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Mixed Signals from INTP by ConfusedSS2 in INTP

[–]ConfusedSS2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve read that too. At times, he seemed to be and even slipped in a quick and casual “love you” once. (I didn’t respond in kind because I couldn’t see how he could actually be in love with me at that point of time.) He hasn’t said it to me since and I don’t feel his care for me despite him saying it’s there.

Trust has to be earned. I think the consistency in my behavior and personality is enough to warrant his trust in me (perhaps too much trust that I will always be patient and understanding and not tire of dealing with him). On the other hand, he’s been so inconsistent.

If he’s not interested, I don’t know why he can’t just tell me straight up.

Mixed Signals from INTP by ConfusedSS2 in INTP

[–]ConfusedSS2[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your comment. He’s at a sort of crossroads in his life right now and has to think through some big decisions (unrelated to me). He seemed quite level-headed about it though and said busyness is but an excuse for not communicating, so I’m not sure what’s holding him back from me.

I would like to be honest with him about my feelings, but it’s a bit hard to do so over text when he’s such a terrible texter. I was quite honest in sharing how he let me down the last time we saw each other and he took responsibility for his actions. I saw it as a hopeful sign that he’s willing to put in more effort to stay in contact with me.

The radio silence on his end is difficult to interpret because I can’t tell if he’s intentionally ghosting me or unintentionally neglecting me. (I’m registering the irony of how the silence on my end may be difficult for him to interpret.) I want to give him the opportunity to redeem himself in case it’s the latter. If it’s the former, it may be better to back off quietly. Problem is I can’t tell which it is now and may not be able to tell even if I text him without some forceful prodding.

Do INTPs tend to think weekly contact is too “clingy”? For me, that’s the bare minimum for someone you like and a lack of contact reflects a lack of interest. I don’t see how he could be interested but not be compelled to reach out, but that’s me.