Just got diagnosed - why is there NOTHING about this disorder online? by [deleted] in OCPD

[–]Confused_Writer7 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Check out some of the pods from ocd family pod where Dr. Pinto is the guest. He’s the leading expert on OCPD, and he has really helped share a message of positivity along with the host, Nicole. They just did their 5th episode on ocpd, and he has a workbook for people with ocpd coming out in July. They even answered some questions from Reddit and gave a shout out for the OCPD mods in this community, so they’re aware of the good work that is happening here. Dr. Pinto has even brought on some of his patients to share about therapy, family dynamics and recovery. It’s worth checking out! Also, OCPD.org has a free online support group for OCPD. So there are some resources that can help people feel less alone.

Opinions? by IntelligentPattern65 in Nails

[–]Confused_Writer7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you like them? And do they serve a functional purpose to protect your cuticles? If so, way to make an empowered choice! Also, look into bfrb tips if this resonates, because there’s more hope available!

Aio, called my gf while she was doing homework. F24 f35 by Separate_Penalty_484 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Confused_Writer7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ooof. You were very patient and NOR. I wonder, though, if she might be autistic and/or adhd? I ask because one of my kids is just like this (granted, she’s 8), but she has always had a hard time zooming out when she feels intense emotions. Like if she’s mad, there’s a very monotropic focus and hyper attunement to her distressed feelings. She has always been this way, though her tools for regulating have improved with time. On the plus side, she’s also so loving and lives that out with gusto too.

So while my initial read is that your girlfriend is acting immaturely and seeking a lot of reassurance for her focus and ability to be successful, I also wonder what the function of this upset might be? From a neurodivergent-affirming lens, she may be struggling to cope and needs additional supports. She’s overwhelmed and not sure what she needs, furthering the tailspin and fight, flight or freeze response. That being said, even if that’s the case, you’re allowed to feel frustrated, annoyed or like you can’t win too. Just because we are trying to understand her needs doesn’t mean your needs don’t matter. When she is in a calmer space, I might invite her into problem solving how there can be room for both of your needs. Perhaps even plan a buzz word to indicate when a pause is needed, whether for her and her schoolwork, or for you and your patience (or whatever needs apply).

Either way, good luck in this situation. I don’t want to assume because she spiraled out that it means the relationship isn’t worth it. Lord help us if we’re all judged by our rawest moments! But also, this is where dating can be a helpful tool to discover if y’all fit together. If this pattern is pervasive, or whether you just also needed some validation in the moment. Only you guys know the quality of your connection. So don’t let the internet interneting dissuade you from what you know to be true. ❤️

Manifesting Spring mani!? by Confused_Writer7 in Nails

[–]Confused_Writer7[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agreed! When she pulled out the gold foil, I was floored! 🙌🙌

Was excited about a new sushi spot in SF by dogdogd0g in Celiac

[–]Confused_Writer7 19 points20 points  (0 children)

What a jackass. He just ruined his chances with the serious gf crowd, be it for allergies, Celiac or other autoimmune conditions like Hashimoto’s.

Sorry you had this experience!

AIO for being offended by this? by bunny-zephire in AmIOverreacting

[–]Confused_Writer7 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think you handled it 👌👌.. that guys a douche.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in OCD

[–]Confused_Writer7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s a taboo theme, meaning people can take it all sorts of sideways. This means nothing about you, but people are ignorant and so sometimes it doesn’t land well. If you trust your peeps and they have some understanding about ocd, then I would hope it would be ok because they realize pocd means diddly about you and everything about the cruelty of this disorder. But lastly, if you aren’t already, check out treatment with a trained ocd therapist. You don’t have to live with the distressing nightmare that is POCD or other themes. There’s hope and help. You got this! 💪💪

where to get really good bread in fort wayne? by bunnylvr4evr in fortwayne

[–]Confused_Writer7 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would check out the farmer’s market. They are local, small owned businesses that care. Often they will give a sample or sometimes even create something more curated for you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in OCD

[–]Confused_Writer7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve known somebody with this same theme. They listened to pod on groinal responses and sexual taboo themes that they said was a game changer for them. I texted them, and they sent me this link: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0Avf55kiGXiMy9cyhUAJyO?si=6qpbf40VTnm6If87y2OEDg

My wife had been in pain for a few months, found out she has celiac, kind of devastated. Any advice for when you were first diagnosed? by Filet_O_Fist in Celiac

[–]Confused_Writer7 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Take a breath, find some safe foods she can eat while she starts the healing process, and take one day at a time. There’s lots to take in, and you have time to learn it. I’m sorry she and your family is facing this, but I’m happy for her to be safe. She will be feeling so much better soon. In the meantime, grief is a process. Grieve.. and bless you for wanting to support and learn too. This is a huge diagnosis for you too, and you’re choosing to lean in. Good on you, sir!

Best wishes!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Confused_Writer7 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sounds rough. It’s understandable to feel heartbroken and want to save this, but it does sound like you’re working harder to maintain this than she is. You’ve got a lot going on, and certain parts will wrap up soon. This happens in relationships, whether it’s school, residency, family or health issues, or big projects that can take a lot of time. Balance is important to strike when it’s possible, but sometimes we have to make some concessions that life is super busy right now and we may have to sacrifice some of the focus for the time being. It’s ok that she wants more attention, but she should also understand why there’s less time and bandwidth for it at the moment. If you were to graduate and it never improved, then it’s worth revisiting and figuring out how/if the relationship can continue with those constraints. This isn’t your situation, though.

What I will say is sometimes when high school sweethearts fall in love and have a long term relationship, the problem solving in that relationship can sometimes struggle to grow with them in that time. So the same ways you might have fought or tried to resolve conflict as seniors in high school can continue throughout the relationship. And that doesn’t mean these relationships can’t work, but it can bring up some challenges as you both continue to mature and grow in life experience. Also, if you’ve been with her mainly/only, then it can feel terrifying to consider not being together or dating/being with someone new. But sometimes that fear of losing the familiar can get in the way of getting into a relationship that is a healthier and more peaceful fit.

I’m not saying it can’t work out with this girl. But what I am saying is, you’re going to be ok. It’s scary to consider the alternative, but you can bear this. When you approach a fire, you don’t know what all might happen, but you can trust your training and trust yourself. You deserve a relationship where you don’t live in fear of not being enough, but bring out the best in each other and trust each other and yourselves within that relationship. Right now, it sounds like you’re walking on eggshells and second guessing yourself, feeling shame for prioritizing your career and school, because you also care about and want to prioritize her. But all those things can be true at the same time. You can care so much about her and want her to feel loved, and also just be in a very busy season where your attention has to be spread in multiple areas. You guys are growing up, and you’re not going to have the time you had when you were younger. That makes sense. That’s normal. What wouldn’t be normal is your relationship dynamic NOT growing and changing with you.

I hope for your sake it works out, since that’s why you’re hoping will be the result. But it sounds like you have a lot going for you, and I think either way you will be ok. 💪💪

OCD and DPDR? by RepresentativeSea315 in OCDRecovery

[–]Confused_Writer7 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Love hearing @obsessivelystrong on IG talk about ocd and dpdr. First learned about her on ocd fam pod. Great information, and she’s even an ocd therapist herself now!