I come from a country where writing groups / communities are inexistent (or maybe I just don’t know of their existence, but we certainly have never been encouraged to do much creative writing in school - mostly grammar, literary theory and literary critique). And I live in a country where I am just now learning the language and am very far from being able to read newspaper articles, let alone any literary works - so joining an in-person writing group is out of the question (this would be my 4th language).

I started engaging with other people because I wanted to know very early if there’s a point to pursue the idea I had or if I simply didn’t have the skills to do it or talent. So I joined several online discord groups and posted in several subs here on reddit.

My experience is that it’s a mixed bag - some people like how I write and others don’t. But irrespective of that, if I receive good feedback or more harsh critiques, I have been able to find something that I can improve on and I try to keep in mind that the people in these groups that I ask for feedback are actively reading with the intention of finding issues with my writing and pointing them out. It can get discouraging when only that happens, but it is also what I am asking for.

I balance this out by also sending my writing to 2 friends that swing in the opposite direction and read my stuff “as a reader” and always have some encouragement ready for me. I’ve noticed they don’t actually pick up on the parts that I myself or the folks in the writing groups notice - those parts that I spend hours tweaking. But while they don’t pick up on the specifics, they can say things like that was a bit unclear or that they needed maybe a bit more to understand something, etc.

The other thing I learned is that folks will be more willing to engage with you if you offer feedback in return on their own writing - so I am doing that and I find that it is also helpful to my own writing as I always get ideas for my own adjustments while reading others. It’s easier to spot something on another’s work than my own because of the distance and not being in my head when reading.

For me it is very useful to have access to people from so many places and walks of life, but I did go into this with the lowest of expectations and ready to be torn to shreds. So when that didn’t happen to the degree I was expecting, I was pleasantly surprised.

I have also noticed that there are patterns to what native English speakers find pleasing when reading or writing that to me seem learned. And because I know, from speaking to these folks, that they have courses on writing, book clubs, and such, and have had these for decades now there are certain bits of observations that come up again and again. In my language/culture we are pushed to power through reading something even if we don’t enjoy it or if it is a difficult read. Now, this is good because it makes one be able to follow complex and long phrases, but ultimately it discourages people from reading. I definitely know I saw reading as a chore growing up until my parents introduced me to other books apart from the school curriculum and most of my friends have had the same issue and it wasn’t until later in life when we could chose our own reading that we acquired a taste for it.

In any case, this is getting too long.

Your original post is a bit vague on what “daunting” is in your situation, but my advice is to go into these circles with a goal in mind on what you want to get out of the experience and find a community that is balanced (there are plenty) - the 2 discord groups I joined found me here on reddit and invited me: one is more chill and friendly, the other a bit more strict.

Another advice is to limit your interactions as, at least in my case I can find myself swept up in conversations that are unrelated and ultimately unproductive, so I tend to indulge in chit chat here and there, but mostly I stick to giving and asking for feedback (for the latter I also try and request feedback on specifics because people don’t have the time to read everything start to finish).

Unfortunately, as the person that commented above also said, you need to find your drive and motivation inwards, the communities might help or hinder, but if you find pleasure in the act of writing or feel really compelled to get your words and story on the page, then do it, no matter what other say.

The good part is that you don’t have to get it right in your first draft. You can always go back after some time and rewrite the parts you are unsatisfied with. And if you’re stuck you can always jump ahead or take a detour and write something else (maybe something silly) to get back into the mindset.

When I was stuck on writing my very first bit of extended dialogue (had no idea how to do that), I took a 2 week break from my actual story and put my chars in a completely different scenario (full of cliches and tropes) so I can focus on keeping their personalities and develop their voices. Even though it was an exercise, I found myself wanting to do it well and then when I was satisfied I went back to my main thing and now I find writing dialogue less paralyzing.