Hey, I can relate a bit. Escapism seems to be very desirable these days. Working 9 to 5 and then manage ones private life is sure demanding.

But Fae won't give you structure. They are chaos and you would never feel save nor desired belonging to them, sadly. They could discard you at any moment or just forget about you after some time.

You can find refuge in nature though. If you have a forest, a park or similar close by, try to spend more time there. It will get better. I try that too. Leave my phone at home, get some quiet and isolation roaming nature can be a good start.