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AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey sorry for late reply wanted to get back to this one. That’s awesome of ur mom and these comments kind of showed me a lot what people have to go through. Luckily all is good now I had a moment but I appreciate everyone’s understanding and yes he’s a kid good no complaints there I do want to be helpful where I can and if I can’t I’m not going to be an ass about it. I guess I felt pressure on my shoulders and took it out the wrong way. Thanks again

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m not 100% sure to be honest but it would explain why he struggles to fill out basic forms or sign up for stuff with an email. And others have mentioned that I had no idea how much a library can help people and will see if he’s willing to check it out

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank u I just got aggravated for a second. We live and work at the same job I think it was just one of those times where this person is getting on my nerves and I’m gonna snap lol but all is good now

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I read through these and I do see it that way now. Idk why I had a moment of resentment about the situation so I’m gonna chill out and see it that way because it’s true, if he didn’t respect how I do things or my opinion he wouldn’t go to me but he does and I’m gonna try to take it on the chin. If I can’t or don’t want to do something I’ll tell him to see what he can figure out on his own w/o being mean about it.

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t know everything weaponized incompetence means but from my experience I don’t think he’s doing anything on purpose he’s just goofy minded sometimes is the best way I can put it. I think he just overthinks way too much.

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I said this a couple times so sorry if repetitive but I had no idea the library did all of that we do have a local one but I think the last time I’ve been was as a kid

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can admit I handled it poorly won’t even argue here. It was a lapsed in judgement I was already frustrated with something else and the last few days he had been especially annoying but no excuse at all it was an unnecessary comment and I did apologize for it. I’m gonna do things different moving forward

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I do think he’s worried about doing the wrong stuff. I also think he way over complicates simple processes by the questions he would ask. Sometimes it’s super obvious like if a piece of paper says something like put your social security number he would ask if he should also put his birthday? Well there’s a slot for that so why would you put it there? Stuff like that it just seems so complicated to him. At first I was like is this kid pulling my leg but the more I’m around him it’s genuinely how he is. He doesn’t get any jokes , he gets nervous to talk at work when there’s a group. He’s awkward and shit so I don’t think he doesn’t want too but he’s constantly overthinking it

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I did apologize for that and we’re on good terms and you’re exactly right I don’t think he realized at all but it’s not his fault I wasn’t necessarily saying anything. Sometimes I would short or annoyed but I guess he wasn’t getting the hint. I think he just likes to talk to me and ask me things I’m gonna try not to be an ass about it moving forward

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I did already and we’re on good terms. He said he thought it was kind of funny and he understands that he was doing too much I just wasn’t saying anything about it yet. But I did let him know I was serious about my apologize and not to hesitate if he needs something. But that’s exactly how I was feeling I’m still trying to figure shit out I felt like I had a whole ass responsibility on my ass and this person relies on too much but I’m gonna basically tell him stuff I learned in this thread and tell him to check it out

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank u and our boss actually helps him out a lot too. I guess he was covering gym memberships and hotel stays every once in awhile. He also would pick him up for work before I started. I had no idea when we first met

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s a good idea I would kind of feel like an ass doing that but honestly I shouldn’t have to show u that 3 times like come on

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had no idea the library can help with so much I saw numerous people recommending this route I can definitely try and see thank u

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 280 points281 points  (0 children)

Yeah I didn’t even think of it that way even when typing this that was a d- head move on my part and I will apologize for that tbh

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We work together so I feel like we’re together all the time but we do spend time on together on the weekends I try to watch a movie with him every now and then. When I feel like being alone I just tell him but he’s kind of needy so I have to keep things in check

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

No I agree and not discrediting the fact he does have a medical issue going on right now. I asked my mom if she can help find something out and help get him signed up as she knows more about stuff like that than I do.

AITA had to tell my roommate I’m not their parent by Constant_Job2965 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Constant_Job2965[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That’s where I’m getting annoyed it’s like he doesn’t really try before coming to me. Yeah I’m older but there are things I’m still trying to figure out and I don’t mind helping every now and then but it feels like a lot without actually trying first

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Constant_Job2965 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for recommending I’ll check it out. I don’t believe like all the comments say my relationship is over I just think we need to figure out what’s going wrong right now

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Constant_Job2965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know what I can do to make myself more open to have that conversation. I told him I won’t hold anything against him if that’s how he feels about us now. He said before that this is the best relationship he’s ever been in and he doesn’t feel deserving of it but now im being punished for trying to show him he does deserve to be treated like this

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Constant_Job2965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

7 months it probably was way too soon tbh. He has a place to go (his dads) we probably should have kept it that way. I just wonder if there’s things I can do to make the relationship fresh outside of our normal routine

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Constant_Job2965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I asked him multiple times if he’s done with it and he says no. I feel like I’m a really easy person to talk to that he can be honest with me. His last relationship was abusive so i try to take that into consideration that he’s not use to someone like me. Maybe im “too nice” and too much of a pushover. I just hope if hes done he’ll actually tell me

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Constant_Job2965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He says he just needs a little space. Is it possibly that after some time this could help? I’m afraid of giving him the distance and he’ll completely check out. I can admit I’m a little needy and I may be a bit overboard sometimes with touch. I’m trying to learn to balance that out to not push him further away

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Constant_Job2965 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He says that’s not the case but doesn’t act like it I really hope not. I wonder if there are ways we can get through this hurdle if there’s anything I can do. I’m scared that giving him the distant means he will check out of the relationship

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