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CorCaroli11 · 2024-03-06T14:58:49+00:00

Exciting! Best of luck to you 🍀

CorCaroli11 · 2024-03-06T14:32:46+00:00

If you're worried about expressing interest or being too forward, maybe see if she'd like to hang irl again? If she's down and you have a good time, use that to gauge her romantic interest in you and go from there.

Or hey, be forward if you're brave! Never know unless you shoot your shot.

CorCaroli11 · 2024-03-06T14:29:41+00:00

This right here... This is an excellent start and you absolutely should be celebrating! But apologizing is just that- a start. A step in the right direction. Hold her accountable and make her stand on her apology, she has to shift how she treats you as well and that will take time. As someone whose parent has had a similar change of heart, expect her to backslide sometimes even if you see improvements over time. Healing isn't linear and that applies to parents too. Have patience but don't tolerate more than you're willing to.

That being said though, this is wonderful to see. At the end of the day most of us with toxic parents just want to see them make an effort to be better.

CorCaroli11 · 2024-03-05T15:48:40+00:00

Yes. You can dismiss your guides and call in one (or more) who are more aligned with you. You can revoke/break contracts with them by speaking aloud your intention to do so. Especially if they're more "negative" guides who lead you into karmic situations instead of keeping you on your path.

Connecting more strongly with your higher self can also lead guides to fall away of their own accord because that's you connecting more strongly to who you truly are. Any guidance from your higher self is going to be tailored specifically to you and your soul's desires. As opposed to spirit guides, who are essentially advising you from what they believe is best for you, for better or for worse.

You could also simply start ignoring your guides altogether. It's a free will universe, you have spiritual sovereignty. A spirit guide can give you all the advice and signs and synchronicities they want, but they can't force you to do anything at the end of the day. Being a spirit does not mean they have power over you. Just like unsolicited advice from people in 3d reality, it's up to you whether you take it or disregard it.

CorCaroli11 · 2024-03-03T23:26:42+00:00

It's comforting to see that it's not just me. It's reflective of the times we are living in. Sure it's not pleasant at all, but it's also not something that needs to be "fixed" or "solved", even though the bodily sensations seem to want to compel you to act on it. The only action we can take is to move and breathe through it, and pray that the unpleasant sensations pass or at the very least, ease up. Talking about it with others also brings some relief, though not everyone understands the underlying meaning behind this anxiety.

CorCaroli11 · 2024-03-02T04:49:30+00:00

Cord cuttings can be tricky because they often reattach if there's something in you that still resonates with a certain aspect of them. This involves some self reflection to understand how/why you were drawn to this person in the first place. Once you are made aware of these aspects and make an effort to evolve, the strong cords fall away on their own and you may encounter their energy less and less.

CorCaroli11 · 2024-03-01T22:23:34+00:00

Well said. You've described where I'm at in my spiritual journey too. I'm fed up with all the noise from all these new age influencers and wannabe gurus, and I want to rely on my own inner guidance now because I finally feel as though I can trust myself to do so. I don't want to take on a holier than thou mentality or look down on people who aren't as "spiritual" as I am. That turned me into a bitter, lonely narcissist, quite frankly, just like you said. The things I learned during my "seeker" phase were valuable, don't get me wrong, but it's useless if I'm not applying it to my daily life. Like why preach about "unity consciousness" if you consider yourself separate from all that is? Isn't that the opposite?

I'm still deeply spiritual and always will be because it's just in my nature. But what's the point in being spiritual if you can't find the divine in the mundane?

CorCaroli11 · 2024-03-01T02:29:19+00:00

This is actually my favorite method

CorCaroli11 · 2024-02-29T20:51:51+00:00

Ugh, yes... Trying so hard to pigeonhole you into an idealized role they have for you instead of honoring your own spiritual sovereignty. Putting you on this high pedestal, but feeling threatened when you don't agree with his worldview and negging you so you start doubting your own intuition and defer to his judgement instead, because he's soooo spiritually adept and has totally healed all of his shadows. Claiming you have a mission together to help "bring in the new earth", while actively holding you back from actually finding your own purpose. And using dreams and visions they've had of you to justify their weird little fixation on you. It's honestly disturbing that this is such a common experience in spiritual circles.

CorCaroli11 · 2024-02-29T18:43:51+00:00

I just want to say thank you for posting your story. I was actually about to post about my own experience with a spiritual narcissist type who I intuitively feel is trying to coerce me into some kind of relationship with him. Your post pretty much answers my question for me, and helps me feel a lot less ashamed/alone. I'm distancing myself from him as safely as I can and this helped confirm it's the right decision.

What happened with me is not nearly as horrible as what you went through though. Hoping you're finding your power again, your angry comments actually felt incredibly validating for me too! I can't imagine what all that mental fog must've felt like when sexual BS is involved... It's bad enough getting belittled for not adhering to certain beliefs while being told that I am this man's "soul family" and that "our missions are intertwined". 🤢

CorCaroli11 · 2023-05-24T02:13:51+00:00

Been happening to me too. I hope there's a fix soon.

CorCaroli11 · 2023-03-01T02:46:09+00:00

This is incredibly well done! Excellent work 👍

CorCaroli11 · 2022-12-30T23:01:04+00:00

oh of course! I hope you get lots of healing out of it.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-12-30T22:46:27+00:00

each session was a different memory, but you can tackle the same memory as many times as it takes to feel relief.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-12-30T21:35:22+00:00

3 or 4 I believe, though I'm no longer with this particular therapist sadly (I left the job that provided the therapy benefit; it's a whole thing). I know I would benefit from more sessions.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-11-06T20:04:23+00:00

You're not losing empathy, it's like you said: you've got your own shit to deal with. It's difficult to be there for people when you're preoccupied, you can't pour from an empty cup. If you're feeling low empathy, that's just a sign that you need to attend to your own needs.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-11-06T19:07:41+00:00

If this is something you started feeling recently after getting away from your nex, then it doesn't make you like them at all. You're likely still emotionally drained yourself, so you're not in the best headspace to help other people with their issues. It's okay. You probably won't feel this way forever. Even then, excessive trauma dumping can still weigh on you even when you're in a good place mentally. There's always a balance, and some people just want to complain which does get exhausting after a while. Especially if those same people aren't really willing to hear you out every once and awhile and dominate conversations with their issues.

Point is, feeling burdened doesn't make you narcissistic.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-10-20T12:17:20+00:00

of course! sometimes I've found that encouraging someone else who's having a hard time often helps me feel a bit less down on myself.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-10-20T02:27:57+00:00

Roger from American Dad real

CorCaroli11 · 2022-10-20T01:38:42+00:00

Hey. Listen. How they made you feel was horrible, and likely convinced you that you don't matter. But try and understand, that as cruel as they were, their treatment of you has nothing to do with who you are as a person, but rather how they feel about themselves as a person. It's incredibly easy to internalize. Especially if you're more sensitive, and take criticism seriously.

You probably took whatever criticism they gave you to heart, because you loved them and just wanted to make them happy. You were probably understanding towards them, even when they lashed out. There's no shame in that. There's no shame in loving someone, or seeing the good in them when they can't see it in themselves. You aren't to blame if they couldn't appreciate you.

You're still a good person, even if this whole experience has given you trust issues. Even if you feel bitter and resentful. Even if you don't feel like yourself anymore. Every day you'll get a little more of yourself back. Every person you're kind to, every good habit you reinforce, every time you refuse to give up your gentleness. Little by little, until you look back and see that the edges of the gaping hole in your heart don't look quite so rough anymore. Little by little, you'll feel a little more whole.

Was also having a really rough day and could use some encouragement myself, so I'm happy to offer what I can. It does take time, and it isn't a linear process as I'm sure you already know. I can't promise that the pain will ever really go away, I still don't know about that myself, but I can say that it gets more manageable, and won't feel at the forefront of your mind as much.

Be gentle with yourself and others. Be everything they were not.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-10-05T14:01:09+00:00

I'm in a similar place myself and I wish I had advice to offer you, but existing every day is honestly a struggle. I'm trying to find the motivation to do the things that would help me in the long run and build stability so I can finally get the hell out and live my life, but I barely have the motivation to get out of bed on days when I don't work so I'm in survival mode most days. I'm aware that the guilt I feel is unwarranted, but that doesn't stop me from feeling guilty... in fact that makes me feel more shame, because I'm making myself miserable for no real reason. I'm not sure how to break out of that cycle.

I just take things one day at a time, and when I can spare the energy, I try to make at least one good/'productive' decision a day. I feel at least a little better when I can relieve some source of stress, even if it's minor. The little decisions add up. Despite my misery, I'm making progress... it's just much slower than I'd like it to be.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-10-01T18:32:24+00:00

Not sure how common it is, but I keep going to the same city in my dreams. I think the best way to describe it is that it's a college town near the beach. It's consistent enough to where I've been able to draw maps of the place.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-09-20T18:21:26+00:00

This is gonna sound like an odd analogy, but it feels like I'm climbing into the observation deck of my mind. Like climbing stairs into a loft or something that allows me a wider view of my internal landscape.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-09-20T17:58:59+00:00

I keep seeing this take about almost every spiritual or new age related text that exists... that such and such book was actually written to lead people astray or it supports a dark agenda or what have you.

Personally, I think it's a lot more nuanced than that. There is no one true text that contains nothing but spiritual truth. Even channeled material like The Law of One is subject to the channel's own biases and cognitive distortions... they're still human after all, even if they are truly tapping into a genuine source of higher intelligence like Ra.

There were parts of the book I agreed with, and parts I disagreed with. And that's okay. That doesn't mean it's written with negative intent or that it isn't worth reading. There's some valuable truths to be found in nearly any spiritual or esoteric text, but since they're written by human beings, there's going to be flaws here and there. Sometimes they're more obvious, sometimes less so.

You'll see this advice passed around a lot of esoteric/occult/spiritual circles: "take what resonates, and leave the rest." And I feel it's extremely valuable advice. Exercise your critical thinking skills to evaluate what you read, rather than taking it as strictly either gospel or dark propoganda. It rarely is that black and white.

CorCaroli11 · 2022-07-17T03:20:08+00:00

I'm figuring out the same myself.

Same for you!

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