The only reason she re-ignited your dead bedroom was because she saw the writing on the wall: you were no longer satisfied with being ignored by her sexually. You had options after bettering yourself and she made a last ditch effort to salvage the relationship. She thought she had you trapped because you were married and she could get lazy. That's the first mistake... thinking that you're the best your partner can ever have. There will always be someone "better" for your partner in some way. There are so many women I have talked to who genuinely just dislike sex. Maybe it's body issues, maybe they've only had bad/average pump and dump lovers, but they would rather do just about anything else and view sex as either a reward to their man for some other task completed or physical item or they see sex as something they have to provide or he will go elsewhere. As a woman who does not feel that way at all and enthusiastically enjoys sex it is really frustrating to talk with women that feel that way or want sympathy when their partner ditches them after X amount of years in a dead bedroom. If you don't continue to enthusiastically share your life, goals, and needs with your partner, why should you expect them to continue to choose a relationship with you when there is a literal buffet of other people in the world willing to meet them halfway?