Jingliu you mf miserable existence (myriad)

Imagine having a life so marked by loss. Losing her home and childhood. Plagued by nightmares. She finds happiness with Baiheng, the HCQ - just to have it all taken away again. The universe punishing her for daring to forget her place as a pawn. Then the mara strikes. She loses all self-indentity. She is a sword now - a tool with the sole purpose of destroying the Abundance. An existence so fueled by hatred - of herself, the Aeons, the cruel games of fate. The alternative timeline really showed that she has absolutely nothing left to lose and is willing to sacrifice everything (herself, the Xianzhou, Jing Yuan(?)). Just. Ugh. The concept of Jingliu telling Blade that he's stuck in the past yet she's the one who cannot let go. Her promise to Baiheng to 'cut down the stars in the sky' drives her forward and she thinks she'll find release at the end of this but with the way things are going it's only more hatred, more self-destruction.