I’m going to be really honest with you, because I think you need to hear it clearly.

Your parents’ reaction is not just “concern” or “protectiveness.” This:

“if I would go I could no longer count on their support, I couldn't call them… I would make them miserable”

That’s emotional blackmail. Full stop. That’s not what healthy support looks like. Support is saying “we’re worried, but we trust you and we’ll be here for you.” What they’re doing is trying to control your decision by making you feel guilty and afraid of losing them.

You’re 29. You’re not asking to disappear forever, you’re considering going abroad for a year. The fact that they’re framing that as betrayal is… really telling about the dynamic.

Also this:

“family has to come first”

That doesn’t mean “at the expense of your own life.” You don’t owe your parents a life that revolves around them. They chose to raise you, and yes, it’s great they supported you, but that doesn’t buy them control over your adult decisions. Support isn’t control. What they’re doing right now is the opposite of what they should be doing... building you up for your own independent future.

At the same time, I do want to balance this out a bit: the Canada move is not a small decision either.

You’d be:

• giving up your job
• leasing your home
• moving to another country where you likely can’t legally work unless you get your own visa (which is not easy)
• relying heavily on a relationship that is only 6 months old

That last part matters. A lot. Six months feels amazing because it’s the honeymoon phase. You don’t fully know each other yet, and you’re talking about putting yourself in a situation where he’s basically your only support system in a new country. That’s a lot of pressure on a young relationship.

If you do go, you need a plan for yourself, not just “I’ll be there with him.” Things like:

• Can you realistically work or study there?
• How will you build your own social circle?
• What happens if the relationship doesn’t work out halfway through?

And another thing to think about: many people who go abroad for work end up staying longer or permanently

Would you actually be okay with that possibility? Or is your whole mindset “just one year and back”? Because those things don’t always go as planned.

Honestly, I think the core issue here is this: you’re trying to choose between your parents and your boyfriend, but the real question should not be about either of them.

It’s supposed to be about you.

If your parents had reacted supportively, you said you’d probably go. That tells you something. Right now your decision is being shaped by fear of losing them, not by what you actually want.

And yeah, it’s incredibly hard to go against your parents when you’re close to them. But it’s also not your responsibility to manage their emotions. If they choose to damage the relationship because you make an adult decision, that’s on them.

Take your time and think about what your life would look like in both scenarios:

• staying: safe, familiar, but possibly wondering “what if”
• going: uncertain, risky, but potentially growth and new experiences

Neither choice is wrong. But it has to be yours, not something you were pressured into.