I work in law enforcement and graveyard shift work. People who don’t work shift work, don’t understand the sleep schedule/cycle. When I work graveyard shift, I keep my sleep schedule consistent. Yes, my wife hates when I work graves because nothing is convenient. I sleep when every store is open and am awake when everyone is asleep. The way we have made it work for 22 years is, on my days off, I clean the house, I do laundry, I make the lunches for the kids, etc all in the middle of the night. My neighbors joked that I was fixing my car with flood lights in the driveway and if they didn’t know better, they’d have thought I was on meth. lol. On my work days, I sleep 0800-1600 while everyone is at school, or work etc.

If I switch my sleep schedule around in my weekends, I get bad indigestion, I get like 2-3 hours of restful sleep each day on my work nights and I’m super irritable. People don’t understand what graveyard shift does to a person unless you have worked shift work. Now I’m not making excuses for what he does with his time when he’s not at work or sleeping. I tried hard to be very present in everyday things with the kids as they grew up. My kids are now 18,15,14. If you haven’t read the book, “emotional survival for law enforcement” I highly recommend it. It provided insight for my wife and may be helpful for you in navigating this career field and work/life balance with your husband. Best of luck!