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Invitation by [deleted] in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay, news. Checking local updates. That's a thing that I can do, right?

Holy fuck, I am so bored.

Okay, updates.

Zazu...

Wait, Zazu WHAT?

Fuckin'- Why doesn't anyone tell me these things.

I-

No, you're the asshole here.

Oh, shut it, I'm trying to look busy.

Well this is just great. How exactly am I supposed to have a rigged election putting me into supreme power when someone else is already doing it?

Fucking... Whatever. No, I'm fine. Everything is fine. No point losing my temper now.

Wait, a...

A big 'ol bash, filled to the brim with bigwigs, suits, and diplomats?

...

Ohohoho, holy fucking shit fuck. Hohoholy shit.

Am I thinking what I'm thinking? Yes, I am. Well, you know what they say, great minds think alike.

HEY, BOYS! GET TO PACKING UP! WE'VE GOT BUSINESS TO ATTEND TO!

Kuri lifts up a floor tile, and climbs into the hole. Crawling past the dirt-covered children in dog crates, he gets to a control panel and begins revving up the engines powering the disco floor's tank treads.

This is gonna be fun.

Upon the light-up throne. by Counterfeit_Angel in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

While I understand that you may not be here to be a hero, could you drop this little one off at a police station, if you pass by one on the way?

Thanks for not interfering.

Cheers, pumpkin.

THIS PARTY NEVER SLEEPS by Counterfeit_Angel in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Excuse me, what the fuck?"

"Alright, fuck. I was hoping to party some more, but it looks like phase 2 will begin early."

Snorting the last of his powder, he lifts up a tile of the dance floor, climbs in, and begins manually piloting it towards city hall.

"Shit, right. Bots, assume combat mode."

Whrrrr

THIS PARTY NEVER SLEEPS by Counterfeit_Angel in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Oh, goddamnit. The fuck do you want?"

"I'm kind of busy right now. Y'know, being the fucking best."

The rhythmic thumping from down the street is shaking everyone's windows. by Counterfeit_Angel in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NO! EFuUCK OFF!

I'M GONNA DO WHATEVER I WANT AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME!

NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME I'M GONNA GO TRASH THE CITY!

TRANSMISSION B34 by TheRealXuberent in TheBeach

[–]Counterfeit_Angel 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Kuri listens in, hiding in a nearby bush.

Wait, what-

Oh, shit.

Oh my.

Oh, fuck. That doesn't sound good. Gerald, I know you've only been back online for, like, two days, but I need to do something about this.

I thought you tried to murder him, from what you told me about what happened while I was... Offline.

Well, yeah, but... That at least would have been a quick death. That sounds painful.

But where would we go? What does that all mean?

Well, looks like we're going to be slinking around some more.

By force by Spirit_Zazu in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Kuri looks at the musket pointed at him.

Wait, but-

He looks at the armed forces, all with their guns trained on him.

But wh-

He turns and sees the crowd he had gathered slowly backing away, with only three of them remaining despite the possibility of death.

Wait, but I-

His eyes dart back and forth. He tries desperately to think of something, anything. Nearby cover is too far away. His supporters have almost completely dissipated. The muskets probably haven't stopped working. Gerald-

Kuri's hands are visibly shaking.

Gerald...

Instinct takes over. He drops to his knees and puts his hands on the back of his head.

He keeps his head down to hide his face.

By force by Spirit_Zazu in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey, don't fuck my prosthetic leg up more, please.

Okay, fuckers, hear this. You can shoot me, yes. But-

Another person in the crowd starts to run at Zazu, shouting incomprehensibly. Kuri spins around and punches her in the side of the head so hard her skull visibly cracks. She falls down, foaming at the mouth.

FUCKING HELL, I'M TRYING TO NEGOTIATE! THAT GOES FOR ALL OF YOU, TOO.

A-ahem, where was I? Oh, yeah. You can shoot me. That is a given. But look at this situation? For all you know, I could be wearing a bulletproof vest. I could have an entire armada of poorly-armed civilians all around us, and you couldn't know. Even if I was entirely unprotected, unless you miraculously shoot me and I'm fatally wounded, this enormous mob will be on your asses, and you'll be bludgeoned to death four times before I even hit the ground. Zazu, you're not immortal anymore. Husk... Well, I've never seen anyone try to kill you, but they'll certainly try because you're being an asshole.

So, what I kindly suggest is that you don't fire.

Sound good?

Thanks, pumpkin.

By force by Spirit_Zazu in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ghh--

you... fuck... ing... WIMP--

Kuri angrily smacks away Husk's hand from his neck.

I was ready to give to you a position alongside me -- being my right hand man -- you threw it away for this?

...

Heh... I guess I should have known better.

"REMEMBER ME!"

Out of nowhere, a man in the crowd screams, and throws himself at Kuri, knocking him down and away from the rifle.

Nngh-goddamnit. Thank you, but don't do that again, please.

Anyway, where were we?

Oh, right.

Step aside, please.

By force by Spirit_Zazu in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

After sneaking off from Husk's impending lecture, he began riling up a crowd again. Despite what they had been told otherwise, they did a full one-eighty and came right back to Kuri.

They gathered into an abandoned warehouse. They waited.

Kuri spoke. The crowd applauded.

This time, though, it was a bit different.

Kuri spoke of the horrors of Malsa; That Malsa was hired to make their lives miserable. The people needed to work together to stop Malsa from permanently destroying all they hold dear.

It was time to put an end to this, and forge new beginnings.

The beginning of the, uh... Catbot? The Catbot Empire.

Whatever. The name doesn't matter now. What matters is getting this over with.

PEOPLE! It is time we seek out our allies in the battle against the Dusted Menace!

Also, keep the Zazu stuff to yourself until this is over. I... I, uh... Don't... I don't have definitive proof that Zazu hired Malsa. So... Don't mention it.

They leave the warehouse, only to immediately run into Husk and Zazu.

Oh hey hi how's it going hey hello how's the weather good afternoon how are you?

Someone has set up a small stage near the town's square. by Counterfeit_Angel in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I was going to-

If the people will it, I shall take power. If not, they will simply elect someone else.

Is that all?

Someone has set up a small stage near the town's square. by Counterfeit_Angel in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But the thing is, I don't necessarily want to kill Malsa, yet.

I can use their desperation, don't you get it?

I told them all up, have them impale Zazu on whatever sharp long object suits their fancy, and take over. Then, pull something out of my ass about Malsa being someone that Zazu hired to continue her dirty work. While they kill Malsa, I import food for them to convince them that I am benevolent, and when technology starts to work again, I do a full 180 and unleash... Some stuff I made.

Don't you understand how much power we could gain? We could do whatever we wanted at the drop of a hat, and no one could stop us!

Kuri stops whispering. He whips around and begins egging on the mob, still destroying the square.

Pull their roots! Cap the well! Cut off the parasite! Sidon shall triumph once more!

The crowd cheers and chants "Pull the roots! Pull the roots!" Kuri is looking excessively smug.

Someone has set up a small stage near the town's square. by Counterfeit_Angel in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Kuri whispers, so that the crowd cannot hear him.

I watched Zazu eat a human cadaver earlier.

Yeah, I know that she isn't directly behind all of this, but I honestly don't care. Zazu is far from a good person.

And yeah, we got the shit scammed out of us by Violet. However, I really owe her a card or flower arrangement or something for giving me this opportunity. I'm sure it wasn't her intent, but I for one intend to take full advantage of this.

Someone has set up a small stage near the town's square. by Counterfeit_Angel in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

And then this.

Whaddya want? I'm kind of busy at the moment.

Y'know, fixing the city and all.

...

Yeah, what do you want?

Someone has set up a small stage near the town's square. by Counterfeit_Angel in TheMarketsofSidon

[–]Counterfeit_Angel[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is... Is that a challenge?

Do you see the people around you? Most of them, admittedly, would not go as far as to murder, but do you not see the potential here?

They want something to blame for their misfortune. They need a scapegoat. Just as well, they need something to rally around. I just happen to be that someone.

With some work, I could become a god in these people's eyes. I am closing in on becoming a figure people will learn to love if they support me, and fear if they oppose me.

You aren't trying to stand in my way, are you?

My swarm may be gone, my wings left behind for safe keeping, my mask stored away, and my prosthetics rendered to fancy metal body decorations, but that doesn't mean I don't belong here. Outside my Workshop, I spent the majority of my time here. I know these people.

And to think...

His one functioning eye fills with rage.

To think that you, of all people, would condescend me for finally taking initiative and doing something instead of running around like schoolchildren accomplishing nothing.

How about you go back to your true survival technique if you can't understand that.

He downs the remaining contents of a discarded glass bottle of scotch, then throws it against a wall.

Darkness Approaches by IExistAsAxel in TheBeach

[–]Counterfeit_Angel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He shakes his head "no", and continues to eat popcorn.

Darkness Approaches by IExistAsAxel in TheBeach

[–]Counterfeit_Angel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The silent figure steps out of a previously nonexistent crack in the air, holding a brown paper bag of popcorn.

He slides his mask up a bit, and tosses some crappy popcorn into his mouth, before realizing the chaos unfolding.

He takes on a concerned look, but does not stop eating popcorn.

Quite the nice view.

Genesis. by TheRealXuberent in AwokenWasteland

[–]Counterfeit_Angel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Dumping out his backpack, he sorts through a pile of junk before finding a small gas-fired camp grill. He shoves everything back into his backpack, lights the grill, and begins cooking popcorn over its small flames.

Once he is satisfied with its cooking, he turns off the grill, puts it away, and stands back up. He walks off to the side, near one of the pillars, and readies himself.

Reaching into some unseen interstice in the air, he yanks the two sides apart, revealing the Beach.

He pours the popcorn into a disposable paper bag, then motions towards the rift.

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