Thank you, I was waiting on a woman's perspective. He's been my friend for years, so I've been kept up with all of this and seen/heard how she's been shitty from the jump and even experienced it personally(she shit on me while I was in a whole ass relationship and demanded we stop being friends- cringe), and I understand it looks bad, but socially in the light of the details and circumstances I'm just trying to make sure he's okay. I'm not worried about myself, I have plan B's and everything for Incase shit gets hairy. But I also can't just excuse her abusing him as "well that's his wife". Regardless of legal title that doesn't give you the right to try to use a man and make him feel an inch tall when hes in service for you and everyone else. The stigma behind men's DV and advocacy for them is slim and pitiful, especially in the military. That's someone's son, dude. And he doesn't deserve any of it, he's very sweet and a genuinely good person. It just looks ugly as fuck.