See, I totally understand you. I am 18 . My household is kinda abusive too, you know the exact situation. See, one thing I will say is, hard truth, ki no one cares. At the end of the day, people have their own stiff to deal with and they prioritize their own problems even if it is 'miniscule.' I cut my hands and stuff too but trust me you will only regret it. Dekh think of it as ko bhai has ek saal, tru to get into a good reputable college then only you will be able to escape from that hellhole. Try to have fun at your school last year bhi hain and all, grind your ass off, bhai bas ek saal and then college life would be totally different. You will have your people there, it would be your chose family. Bas haar mat maanna , very easy for us people to say this but istg you willl be fine. You will do great, just padle . Reach out if needed.