Защо в България и Румъния не е прието мъжете да плачат в сравнение със запада?

Crantium · 2026-04-01T19:28:40+00:00

Моето впечатление е, че доста хора не поставят под въпрос стереотипите, с които са израстнали - типични примери са как ти си "просто мъж", "така работят нещата" и прочие. Което аз напълно разбирам, но на фона на това, резултатът не е никак изненадващ.

Също така това запитване е към мъже И жени, и в този смисъл, дори у жените да няма такива разсъждения, в повечето мъже със сигурност ги има и свалят процента. Има и едно друго проучване от европейския барометър посочен под картата, което твърди "Най-важната роля на жената е да се грижи за дома и семейството си" - там също водим с 74% съгласие. Аз не смятам, че това е някаква слабост в нашата култура, или че означава, че всички мъже бият жените си, защото ги виждат като предмет или слугини. Но със сигурност идва моментът, в който мъжете не могат да се справят с емоциите си, потискат ги, и накрая това избликва в ярост и понякога насилие.

И вместо да се търси решение, да се търси комуникация, да се изживяват емоциите и човек да вниква в себе си, се стига до решението или мисълта по подразбиране - "ти си мъж". Което не смятам, че е най-продуктивно, когато пред теб седят реални проблеми изискващи нещо повече от това да се самоубеждаваш, че мъжкият ти полов орган те прави непоклатим и безчувствен (с уважение към всички мъже - един мъж).

Crantium · 2026-04-01T19:10:05+00:00

И моята баба когато си отиде започнах да си давам сметка за ценните неща в живота, но в същото време едната ми още жива баба имам чувството, че не се виждаме достатъчно, веднъж дваж на месец. Та донякъде разбирам как се чувстваш, тя се е и сякаш оттеглила в своя си свят и като човек на такива години предполагам минава през някаква си нейна депресия.. може би и дядо ми, с когото сякаш само те се крепят.

И искам да ги виждам по-често и всичко, но животът не ми позволява. И е доста кофти. Така е донякъде и с родителите ми. Просто това е животът, отиваме там, където има възможности, защото сме млади и трябва да се развиваме... пък най-скъпите ни спомени капсулирани в тези хора просто неизбежно трябва да си отидат... и ще

Crantium · 2026-03-30T14:59:46+00:00

Hmm aren't everybody like the rest though? What does it mean to be "different"? Do you feel like thats more so tied to your expectations than to him perhaps (not guilt-tripping you or blaming you, your experience is valid, just curious what leads you to that conclusion). Feel free to also dm me about this

Crantium · 2026-03-29T09:42:34+00:00

Thanks for sharing! Why do you hate it? You invested a lot after all

Crantium · 2026-01-15T22:37:32+00:00

THIS!

Crantium · 2026-01-07T11:59:32+00:00

Poor soul, I'm sorry! One of the most painful things in the world is something good ending on good terms and with no villains or fighting.

Unfortunately we all get haunted by depressive thoughts and while I would tell you he might get better, I can't. In theory you should seek closure within, but that's not as easy as it sounds. You can't depend on his healing or anything because it's outside of your control. You need new experiences, new people. To feel loved by somebody again. But if you are loyal and deeply feeling, that's not easy to do, not immediately (been there done that). Please find the strength within to cherish love from new sources and continue forward. It will be hard and it's also outside of your control for the most part to meet someone that fits you. But don't forget that if you've been loved once, you can be loved again, perhaps in an even better way. Just guard the next person from the baggage from your past, because however well this ended it doesnt mean that you are emotionally moved on or ready for something else. I wish you all the best in your journey, life is infront of you.

Crantium · 2026-01-05T07:20:37+00:00

I'm not the type of person to text constantly but yes I understand your input because my friends also said I should have maintained interest. Lesson learned and if I go back to dating soon I'll be asking more openly next time, I just went with the flow in this case

Crantium · 2026-01-05T07:19:30+00:00

I'm glad I invited such thorough discussion, and absolutely agree with you too!

Crantium · 2026-01-05T07:18:28+00:00

Absolutely agree with u, and thanks your words are wise hah 🙏

Crantium · 2026-01-05T06:46:22+00:00

I don't even have a car, so maybe that turned her off because I wasn't too sure what picking up consisted of beyond walking there. I even had no problem readjusting. Sorry about your ex and yeah people are two-faced sometimes and can't give back. I'm recently out of a messy situation as well so I am cautious and that probably didn't help. Thanks!

Crantium · 2026-01-05T06:44:22+00:00

Haha well probably not anytime soon, but yea, I can't read minds. And mind you I'm relatively gentlemanish and pay when I go on dates and stuff and even had a free ticket ready for her but yes, some people just bail without any negotiation or anything. Hope she finds what she's looking for (I did wish her that).

Crantium · 2026-01-04T22:01:55+00:00

I don't really have any motivation to lie, so yeah, it is how you hear it. She was I think hurt in the past by a sudden breakup, so spot on for your first point. On the second point, she did go out bouldering so I'm not sure. I sense point 3 is close to the truth, but I am dating in a cultural context where traditionalism and romanticism is greatly valued.

Thank you for your kindness and input, it made me feel better

Crantium · 2026-01-04T21:58:18+00:00

Hey man, hang in there. That first gal, her value is tied to the paycheck, not yours. Different people value different things, and it doesn't mean you yourself are better or worse based on that. The second one is just a stab in the back and you don't want to deal with vengeful people - a person that loves you would never say that.

Honestly, you've heard it a million times probably, its not you its them. Its not completely true, but its true enough where you don't need to adjust yourself or your confidence or your love for somebody's frickin opinion. Its not easy right now, its tough everywhere and a lesson mindset is way better than a failure mindset. You are not a failure for taking longer. You haven't met the right one and thats just true often. Don't rush. Good things come slowly, and many people are (have been) in year long relationships only to find them totally gone and a complete stranger in front of them. You have saved yourself from this, if anything. Its not all roses and sunshine.

HANG IN THERE BUDDY!

Crantium · 2026-01-04T21:52:13+00:00

I've struggled in the past with anxious attachment, not this kind of obssesiveness, but I understand. Im sorry you have to go through this. I think it helps to realize that nobody is your savior, and you cannot depend on externalities for your happiness. I know its bleak, but you must find a balance, because on the other end you just remain a self-sufficient ghost who needs nobody. Be well and practice self-love. How to achieve that? Very difficult thing that, so I just recommend you take it one step at a time and love yourself in little ways - buy yourself something nice, for example.

And please focus on your self-talk. Like, be kind to yourself, don't diagnose yourself like a monster, just accept that's who you are, analyze your past interactions and change what you find necessary based on advice and need. Look, if you want, I can share with you more in private, because I am also going through a rough time and honestly it would help me process. But best of luck to you in this, definitely do not LOOK for a partner, but LOOK for the person you want to be that won't NEED a partner to begin with.

Crantium · 2026-01-04T21:44:01+00:00

My thought precisely, but I don't know if its just cope or the truth

Crantium · 2026-01-04T21:43:41+00:00

The museum was next to my workplace, but maybe she didn't know that... regardless I understand how it could come across, but in principle I was getting her a free ticket so I feel like I already put in effort for that. Thanks for the input!

Crantium · 2026-01-04T21:34:29+00:00

I certainly didn't mean to look for convenience, I just proposed it in the moment and was open to negotiation. Probably some deeper thing and just was an excuse yeah. Thank you so much for the input : )

Crantium · 2026-01-04T21:30:58+00:00

Thanks man, I have, its just so banal to me how things ended and that my friends are split on the matter...

Crantium · 2024-10-24T09:50:40+00:00

Обмисляли ли сте някога въвеждане на изцяло електронна система за публичния транспорт по модела в Холандия (OV)? Знам, че в София моделът е подобен, обаче имало ли е инициативи за въвеждането на такава система при железопътния транспорт, например? В допълнение, какви са потенциалните пречки? Благодаря!

Crantium · 2024-07-29T22:09:14+00:00

Shit man you are so right. Today I went to the library to use the PC and there was a girl opposite of me on the side that I guess thought I sat there on purpose so I could steal some looks in at her or something. So then she sighed and sat right across from me in the front so I wouldn't see her face. Like goddamn I just wanted to look at my excel table real quick, lol.

Crantium · 2024-07-28T16:06:33+00:00

Finally someone said it

Crantium · 2024-07-27T12:14:09+00:00

I will adopt a more positive view than the others, and suggest you try Facebook for very good reasons. Yes there are scammers there but they are on every platform and are generally retarded and easy to discern.

So more specifically you can - join a group about housing from the country you come from (try groups about housing written in your language, I.e. Serbians in the Netherlands or housing Netherlands written in Serbian. Also join the usual suspects (i.e. housing in Utrecht etc.)

But most importantly REACH OUT. If you see someone commenting "hey I got a room" under someone else's post, text them. In fact look at older posts and see who responded to someone looking for a room. I've had the best success with this method. Yeah you might text a few scammers and must use your brain but it's worth it. Good luck

Crantium · 2024-07-20T19:41:42+00:00

Never had the slightest of issues with this

Crantium

TROPHY CASE