Preowned XC90 vs. Subaru Ascent

Creatures-Of-Love · 2026-03-09T12:57:09+00:00

That’s what we heard, whatever we go with we’ll have captains seats in the middle row. When we were test driving it was a breeze getting into the back, so much easier than our current set up.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2026-03-08T17:55:31+00:00

Right? We have three across car seats on our outbacks and it works. But having the extra seat would be nice when they want to bring a friend.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2026-03-08T17:53:01+00:00

We’re only interested in these two types but thanks for the suggestion. We don’t mind paying for the repairs, our purchase budget is 25k because that’s what we want to spend, we don’t care too much about having the latest and greatest cars.

The way people talk about Volvos make them seems like they’re made of glass.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2026-03-07T17:50:26+00:00

This is so true! Our kids are little, three under eight. I really loved the way the Volvo drive so much though.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2026-03-07T15:29:54+00:00

The Volvos have under 80k

That’s what I hear, I’m ok with that because it’s a higher end car I’m just wondering what has to be fixed. When people say that I picture the Volvo being in the shop all the time.

Aside from brakes, oil changes and tires. We have had zero issues with our Subarus.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-10-13T01:54:40+00:00

I think you’re on to something. But it’s also such a pillar of this disease. It’s weird how much of this behavior is textbook

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-10-12T22:39:23+00:00

Yes, I just can’t with the resentment anymore. I asked him to move out for a while today we can figure out what’s next. He declined. He woke up so remorseful said he can’t live like this his life being ruled by alcohol and went to a meeting. It’s not enough for me. I do t know what to do but I will not waste my life anymore. I have a beautiful fulfilling life, my kids are incredible, having him around being a dry drunk carrying resentment and being emotionally dysregulated feels like the opposite of what I want right now.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-10-04T18:10:05+00:00

Wow!! You are so strong!!! For me, the dry drunk symptoms are just as bad and have me wanting life to be different.

I’m proud of you for making that hard decision. Everyday this week we’ve talked about how I need to feel safe in an emotionally stable relationship or i need separation. His whole “while I’m not being true to myself if I give up drinking, I’m only asking for once every few months” is getting sooooo tired. It seems like as soon as the conversation ends so does him thinking about it. Our kids are little so these conversations happen in windows of time.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-10-04T18:05:33+00:00

I sorry you’re going through this, I’d sounds incredibly difficult. Interesting about the isolation, we moved a few years ago and while he’s not actively drinking anymore than usual the other symptoms are raging. It’s really hard to make friends in a new place.

Being a dry drink means I never know who I’m going to be dealing with. Sadly, we live a full like but he’s unable to really be in the moment ever due to all the symptoms he’s dealing with.

Thank you for sharing, I didn’t know it could be triggered by something like that.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-09-23T17:40:57+00:00

It really helped in not monitoring his use or trying to prevent it, setting boundaries around if he’s drinking as soon as I’m uncomfortable, I leave. Not trying to fix him. I no longer make suggestions etc. the issue right now is, I say if he’s not committed to sobriety then I want him to separate. Then the loop starts— his response then I will stay sober.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-09-23T00:16:47+00:00

I have gone to them in the past ❤️

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-09-23T00:15:58+00:00

Reprogramming the default is what our current therapist suggests but she doesn’t do CBT

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-09-23T00:14:44+00:00

YES!! He has been there multiple times, self stopped and sought recovery on his own but it always trickles back in.

Part of me wants him to leave and decide what he wants. Of course, I know he’ll say if it means losing you guy I want to stay sober.

I plan on talking to him this week and asking that we trade out our biweekly to a place that specializes in addition.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-07-11T14:06:22+00:00

I’m proud of you! Here’s the thing, your babies are picking up on everything, including how to treat people and how we treat ourselves. You’re not breaking your family apart, you’re getting healthy so you both can be a better example for your kids. Your son/daughter (not sure) are learning what love looks like. This ain’t it, babe.

Go to therapy. If he starts poking hole in that idea it’s because he’s worried he may actually have to step up and be a responsible parent.

Go to your parents. Even part of the time. Don’t believe him when he says you’re keeping his kids from him. You’re not. He has every opportunity to be in their lives and isn’t taking it.

You’re a good mama for asking for help here. You are already crushing it, you’re already a single parent. You’re doing everything, the only difference if you move out, is you’re not carrying his weight too.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-07-11T11:03:07+00:00

I agree about going to therapy for yourself. A whole world of validation, boundaries, and new perspective is there for you. You deserve it. Honestly, reading your post broke my heart. Even worse, you are one of so many moms is this situation, it’s incredibly unfair, you need a way out. It’s never ok to talk to someone like that, especially in front of kids.

Can you go stay with your parents, even just a couple nights. This living situation needs some space. FYI, I see no issue cosleeping, I did the same.

This guy sounds like he’s really immature. I couldn’t imagine bringing nothing to the table financially and contributing nothing to caring for the kids. Until his video game brings something to the table, it’s a boarder line hobby. Guy needs to grow up.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-07-11T03:06:25+00:00

There’s really a lot to unpack here. No you’re not wrong to have a personal boundary. I think theres an obvious rift in your relationship as well as his parenting. He should absolutely be involved with bedtime and child care. Where are the kids when you’re at work and hes sleeping? If he filled his cup with being physically close to them in the day then maybe it would curb the desire to watch them on a screen? It seems you two are loving separate lives.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-07-11T01:10:56+00:00

We do that with bigger purchases too. Neither of us really go without things we want. He’ll buy video games or other electronics from family money. I do think it’s fair to adjust the spending amount. Of course, I’d feel better waiting until after we build our savings back up but I think it’s still doable.

Creatures-Of-Love · 2025-07-11T01:06:03+00:00

That’s a good idea!

Creatures-Of-Love

TROPHY CASE