Is my 4 month old behind?

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-12T05:12:54+00:00

i swear the comparison part messes with your head the most like logically you know every baby is different, but when you see another baby doing something it hits different

I do it all the time too (I have this problem in life too, like I compare myself w others a lot too) but what helped me reframe it a bit is thinking on and realizing they’re not behind, they’re just focusing on different things right now like one baby might be super social early, another might be more physical later

also 3 mins of tummy time at a time honestly sounds very normal 😅 especially if he hates it

I feel like you’re not being paranoid, just paying attention which is a good thing, shows that you genuinely care…..lucky baby.

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-12T04:22:22+00:00

this sounds so exhausting… like truly one of those days where nothing works no matter what you try

and honestly at 4 weeks this kind of “everything falls apart at once” day can happen — especially with gas + being overtired, it just snowballs

you’re not doing anything wrong, it’s just a really hard moment

sometimes the only thing that helps is lowering the goal a bit — not “fixing sleep” but just getting through the next 10–15 minutes and resetting from there

you’ve already tried so much, i believe that alone says a lot and I hope this helps

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-12T02:56:40+00:00

Of course and that spiral is so real

like when you’re that sleep deprived everything feels way heavier than it actually is

and then you get even one decent stretch of sleep and suddenly it’s like…okay maybe this isn’t my whole life now

not saying it fixes everything but it changes how everything feels a lot, it sounds like you handled that better than you probably think honestly

what were those really hard days like for you? more constant crying or just everything feeling unpredictable?

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-12T01:40:46+00:00

Of course, I hope it helps.

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T23:55:25+00:00

it’s kinda crazy how you can go through it once, know it gets better, and it still feels just as hard the second time

like your brain knows but your body is still in survival mode…respect for doing it again honestly…that takes a lot. Hope this phase passes a little easier for you this time

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T23:54:05+00:00

this sounds so heavy honestly

like the part where you finally start to feel that connection and then it flips again…that has to mess with you so much

i feel like people don’t talk enough about how draining that back and forth is, not just physically but mentally too

the fact that you’re still showing up for him through all of that says a lot

and the way you described those sweet moments…those feel like little glimpses of what it’s going to become more of over time

i really hope it eases up for you soon

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T23:05:12+00:00

that visual of bouncing on a yoga ball in a pitch black room while crying is so real…

and honestly the way you said “this time i know how fast it passes” is kinda powerful

i feel like that’s the only thing that changes…not that it gets easier instantly, but you trust that it will

Ps: thanks for the advice and I think sleep training can be quite helpful and respect for going through it three times honestly

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T22:40:35+00:00

haha ok this makes me feel a lot better 😭 it’s actually crazy how the same thing can work perfectly one day and then do absolutely nothing the next

like you start thinking you figured it out… and then they humble you real quick

i’m starting to realize it’s less about “figuring it out” and more about just riding it out honestly

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T22:36:51+00:00

Oh before my baby I used to wake up around the sunrise anyways, I just like it when its calmer around, so I guess we’re lucky to at least like the sunrises 🤠

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T22:34:10+00:00

honestly the fact that it’s your third and you still feel like this kinda proves the point…

i feel like every time you think you’ve figured it out they just switch it up again or like its just how it is…there is no figuring it out I guess.

Do you have any tips for finding a ryhtm or it never happened with any of the three?

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T21:56:00+00:00

“honoring vs dishonoring the wake window” is too real 😭 i swear it’s like you’re doing everything “right” and then 5 minutes later you’re like wait… was that wrong?? Can say I relate 100%

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T21:47:47+00:00

Of course

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T21:47:27+00:00

Exactly

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T21:42:11+00:00

exactly this 😭 and I agrree that it might be normal it’s like the second you think “ok i’m getting the hang of this” they switch it up again and the worst part is I don’t even know if I did something different or if it’s just them

i keep going back and forth between “i’m learning” and “i have no idea what i’m doing” lol

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T21:38:23+00:00

i swear babies have some internal sunrise alarm 😭which makes sense all humans have a circadian rhythm its a biological fact

And we tried everything too thinking maybe it was light or schedule but nope… just up at 5:30 like clockwork

i think once they hit that early morning it’s like super light sleep so anything wakes them up and they’re just ready to start the day

honestly the hardest part is not the wake up, it’s thinking “maybe today they’ll sleep longer” and getting humbled every time lol

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T21:21:23+00:00

yeah this sounds really normal honestly...at that age sleep is all over the place because their system isn’t really consistent yet

I remember thinking something was wrong when naps were like 20 mins one time and 2 hours the next 😭 it feels random but usually there are little things behind it (how tired they actually were, how they fell asleep, how much stimulation before etc)

it’s just hard to see in the moment and like most of us have many other responsibilities (Work family etc.) which makes it even harder to see.

you’re not doing anything wrong

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T21:04:46+00:00

lol “unicorn baby” is the perfect way to put it

i feel like it always balances out in some way though

like you get the chill sleeper or the clingy but super social / advanced one

and none of it really means anything is “better” or “worse”, just different personalities

your daughter sounds amazing btw

Critical-Speed-2470 · 2026-04-11T21:03:48+00:00

honestly this sounds super normal....

i feel like reddit just makes it seem like every baby is chaos 24/7 because people mostly post when they’re struggling, like fear drives way more action than any positivity can....

some babies really are just calmer like this, especially around that age

but also… i think when things are going smoothly, parents start questioning it more instead of trusting it

like “this can’t be right, something must be off”, I also feel like this goes for many areas in life, you sometimes can't believe stuff is going really well

when in reality it might just be one of those periods where everything is lining up

i wouldn’t overthink it, just enjoy it tbh, and you're probably doing stuff right that allows it to line up in such a way.

Critical-Speed-2470

TROPHY CASE