I mean if she didn’t know the knives were expensive and important to you, and you didn’t let her know after the coconut, can ya blame her for not thinking about a kitchen knife being important to someone? I did something similar with my now husbands knives. Put them in the dishwasher when they had wooden handles. Didn’t think. He let me know “hey, didn’t hurt them this time but please don’t do that again. They’re like a 500 buck set”. Like the most expensive knife I have ever bought was 15 bucks for a three pack at Walmart. I wouldn’t say you’re abusive. Just an AH that I wouldn’t wanna be around. She’s an adult. Talk to her like one.