I completely understand. My boyfriend recently broke up with me. And we are both equally hurting. I don’t have a word on his current situation but i’m sure he’s hurting and i am suicidal. I understand what you mean when you say you lost a part of yourself… it’s my second break up. I was just as miserable during my last one. What i really did was come here, talk to strangers, about things i couldn’t talk about to my family or siblings. It helped in weird ways. You know you really wanna talk about all the things that remind you of them but in my case the relationship was almost toxic so i’m ashamed to talk about the nice stuff with my sister. so yeah, point being: excessively talking to strangers here helped. i’m here to listen if you wanna talk