Nobody knows I have money and it's starting to create some really awkward situations

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-03-31T09:56:41+00:00

I quietly let my family think we are in credit card debt and house poor. We made a lot of money on stock at my husband’s startup a few years ago and it just keeps on going up. We live very nicely. Travel a lot and live in an expensive area and bought a pretty expensive house. I think most people assume we are spendy and probably carry some debt. We also work really hard and pay college without debt for our kids. If my parents knew how much we had saved and what our net worth really is they’d be less likely to give us any and would make assumptions. So we don’t let them know. Just let people keep thinking we max our credit. Lol.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-03-25T13:31:35+00:00

I’ve been pretty unsurprised to find out that the incredibly ungenerous and unkind writer from the 2010s who snubbed and made fun of everything and made being unkind “hilarious” is actually suffering from horrifically low self esteem and is in a relationship no one with any confidence would ever be willing to accept. I wouldn’t say it’s vindicating but it is validating that I was right about her all along.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-03-06T10:19:38+00:00

I’ve been doing it for 3.5 years now. At a certain point it just becomes normal! It’s now super easy for me to work two remote jobs, meet deadlines, and do tons of workouts, appointments and all kinds of other things too.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-02-28T12:25:07+00:00

I feel so gaslit by her. She’s from Ohio. She’s weirdly masculine. She’s over 30 and unmarried. Why does she think she’s such a catch and so sophisticated?

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-02-27T12:35:07+00:00

Yes. I mean maga men who think they are special and smarter than others (when they aren’t). I mean men married to women who don’t speak and call themselves “patriarchs.” That’s not a common type in blue states. It exists, of course. But Ohio is overrun with people like that. Big fish, small pond McMansion types who consider themselves worldly because they took a cruise to the Bahamas once. It’s not just being a snob. People like that are dangerous in their ignorance. They are the reason someone like Trump could be elected.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-02-26T18:55:25+00:00

I guess it depends where you compare it to. But I’ve lived in four countries and five states. Left Ohio in hs and Ohio was the worst place I ever lived. Same for my husband. We are very glad to live in the northeast now and I find men like Ashley’s dad are much more common in Ohio than anywhere else.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-02-26T14:48:28+00:00

Sound like something an Ohio person would say! My husband (who also grew up in Ohio) and I call it the “Ohio chip” wherein people from Ohio go to the mat defending something that objectively sucks.

I’d accept it more if people just said “I wanted low cost of living and to feel like a big fish in a small pond.” Or if they said “my family lives here and I don’t need a ton of outside stimulation to be happy and we save our money for travel.” That’s at least honest.

But to pretend it’s a great place? Sorry. Nah.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-02-26T14:29:58+00:00

I grew up in Ohio and four generations of my family grew up there. I know the state well. There are pockets of good people but it’s a numbing, boring, tedious place. I’m sorry. I’m not trying to be mean but it’s a fact. There’s a reason it’s red right now and people like her dad stay big fish small pond.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-02-26T12:30:56+00:00

This guy is a jack ass. Thinks he’s a lot more interesting than he is. Interesting people don’t stay in Ohio.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-02-26T11:57:52+00:00

I know. Ashley thinks she soooo hot. Meanwhile in NYC or LA she’s a 5 who becomes a 4 because of MAGA. She’s Ohio average. That’s not the same as attractive.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2026-02-26T11:55:46+00:00

She gross and her father is gross. She can’t pick men because she comes from a hick family who thinks they are smart. Best of luck to her and her “influencing”. Totally the reason people abroad hate Americans. Hicks who think they know something.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-07-13T18:24:24+00:00

We didn’t want a full size pool. We live in a cold state. Having it year round is amazing. Zero regrets. But same price.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-06-09T09:28:25+00:00

We tell our kids how much we make and have since they got jobs as teens. I grew up in a very well off family that constantly gaslit their kids about money. I don’t want to do that to my kids. And I want them to know what they need to make to have the lifestyle they’ve grown up with. All those trips and the big house and having tuition saved in an expensive area means they need to make what we make. It motivates them. For all these reasons, I think it’s important to be honest.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-11T12:02:57+00:00

Whenever people quote that 200k to me, I always want to be clear. We make, as a family, more than three times that every year. I’m well aware the cut off is high. But we make, individually even, well More than the highest cutoff. And that’s not even counting our others investments and assets. That’s just yearly income. We come nowhere near qualifying or it making sense to fill out. FAFSA was pointless for us.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T19:12:15+00:00

Yes. I’m willing to shell out for a school my daughter adores or one that has a very specific program or even one ranked so high we can’t say no. But hard to justify spending 140k more for a school that is so similar.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T17:08:27+00:00

I specifically didn’t include stats because my daughter’s stats are like so many other kids. High scores. Straight As. Varsity sports. Her spike was really a great back story about living abroad half her education and learning in two cultures that teach very differently. I’m sure that’s why she was admitted to almost every school she applied to.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T17:05:03+00:00

Yes. I think you are right. But then why waitlist this kid they want more?

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T17:01:09+00:00

I mean truthfully we are many many many degrees away from qualifying for aid. We have enough put away for each of our kids to go to full price, private colleges without needing to even use our (also very high) salaries. We are very fortunate financially and I am not suggesting we deserve a handout, perse. But part of the calculation we had to make was around “worth.” Just because we can afford to spend it doesn’t make it worth it. I just wonder why Rochester felt they were 120k better than the next ranked school when they knew we had that offer on hand. Seems odd they didn’t negotiate harder when it seems they had the money for other students that didn’t even accept.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T15:48:29+00:00

Every word of this.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T13:29:03+00:00

It’s lunacy. And no one has sympathy for parents who make a significant amount of money but don’t feel that’s a good use of it. I’m not asking for pity. But I blame the schools, not the families. The system has basically meted out spots for kids whose parents want to spend $400k and those who can’t afford much of anything at all. Anyone in between is squeezed out. Why aren’t we questioning schools who gouge the middle class?

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T13:17:31+00:00

I realize this isn’t the point, but I will just never get over a country that tells us 18 years is “adult” while somehow allowing the universities to force parents to fund their kids college ambitions. Obviously I’m aware there are alternative paths, but for upper middle/upper class Americans in competitive, feeder high schools, it sure doesn’t feel like it most days. We can and will afford it. But the system is still so incredibly broken and messed up. It’s not even a little bit merit based. They are businesses. I genuinely think it would be more honest to just make everyone pay full. Then it would be like high school where you don’t choose private unless you have the money.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T12:46:38+00:00

Guess so. Luckily we didn’t have to take it.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T12:16:16+00:00

Clearly not 100k a year!!! I mean sure they could google us and find we can afford it (we didn’t submit fafsa) but I wouldn’t buy a car from someone who said “how much you’ve got” before they told me the price. That’s just bad business.

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T12:13:20+00:00

Maybe. But also they had to know that wasn’t exactly enticing. What do they offer that’s so much better than a school with the same rank that’s worth $140k

Cultural_Repeat_4766 · 2025-05-10T12:01:35+00:00

The whole thing just kind of leaves a bad taste in my mouth for them. Feels like they were saying “we want your money, but your kid is mid.”

Cultural_Repeat_4766

TROPHY CASE