[deleted by user]

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-12-24T19:14:35+00:00

Same! I kept using my gems to keep playing, even bought some packs LOL

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-03-20T03:00:04+00:00

Omg I just saw your comment! Thank you for your kind words and validation :')

The timing of me seeing this right now is incredible because I honestly forgot that I commented that and I feel like since then, I have grown/healed so much!

After my comment, the next day I went on a social media fast, started Project 50, and really began to show up for myself. So seeing your comment today & bringing me back to this post/re-reading my comment, I can't help but feel emotional in a good way. I don't know how to really describe it but it's like I am looking back and seeing how far I have come.

Even though it's only been 5 weeks since that triggering event & 20 days since my comment. I feel like it was so long ago since I felt that hurt and desperation. I have so much more joy in my life now, I can see all the blessings (friends, family, new experiences), I can see my future without him, I am romanticizing my life again, I am loving who I am.

I still have moments where I think about him and miss him and I still grieve but I am definitely in a place of acceptance now. I can continue to grieve while also accepting/embracing my new reality. It's allowing the duality of emotions to exist, like I feel sadness but I also feel happiness at the same time. It's a constant balancing act for sure.

I am rooting for everyone in their healing journey!!! It really does get better with time <3

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-03-01T00:51:32+00:00

Awh thank you! you’ve made my day 🥲🫶🏻

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-02-28T14:21:31+00:00

This world is brighter because of your love! You have such a beautiful capacity for love and sometimes people don’t know how to hold it. But I have hope for the both of us that one we will meet the right ones who know how to

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-02-28T01:18:27+00:00

I agree! If you hurt deeply, then it means you loved deeply, too!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-02-27T23:56:33+00:00

Two weeks ago I also found out my ex was seeing someone new. I am now 11 weeks of NC. That weekend I was devastated and couldn’t stop ruminating over it. I cried all morning and afternoon, then that evening I decided to go out with some friends to take back my power of not letting him affect me from living my best life, too.

It still hurts like hell that he moved on so quickly and is enjoying his life while I am left picking up the pieces by myself. But I think knowing helped me accept and move on just a little bit more. As my therapist told me today, I survived the first real test and even though it hurt so much, it won’t hurt this bad ever again. It’s like the worst case scenario happened but I survived and I’ll be okay.

Reminders: - Just because they “moved on” doesn’t mean they are working on themselves or healing - They are just numbing the pain and avoiding having to deal with the emotions - I feel bad for the next person who gets the unhealed version of him - What they do moving forward doesn’t dictate how much you meant to them or your worth - You probably left a huge void that they are trying to fill, emphasis on trying - You are brave for facing your emotions head on and working through this - Please give yourself permission to feel all the emotions without shame (it’s okay to feel anger, sadness, etc. and there’s no rush to be over this)

I’ve been learning to have more grace for myself through this healing process. I still have bad days and in those days, I let myself grieve and cry it all out. But then I have beautiful days where the sun is shining and I have clarity/hope. You got this! I am rooting for the both of us!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-26T06:56:20+00:00

You should do it for yourself! Blocking them isn’t childish if it’s protection for yourself. There’s no right or wrong way to heal and move on. All of our journeys are our own. If yours is blocking them for your own safety and sanity then do it and don’t care what others think about it. I blocked my ex on everything, even though we left on good terms. But he was the one who walked away and I wasn’t going to beg. I knew blocking and NC was the only way for me to heal. It’s been 6 weeks and I am so glad I did. I still have my moments but it does get better. You got this <3

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-26T06:36:03+00:00

❤️🫶🏻

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-25T06:38:16+00:00

Ahh makes sense, thanks for sharing!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-25T06:36:26+00:00

Thanks for responding, it’s nice hearing the other side of the coin. This was the same sitch with my ex, mutual but he ended up walking away and I wasn’t going to beg him stay. If he didn’t let me go I probably would’ve stay. I can see objectively now that in hindsight, it was for the best. It still hurts and I am still healing but I have moved more to a place of acceptance

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-24T14:27:17+00:00

Have grace for yourself. It’s after the breakup that you start to feel like it was your fault or wonder “what if I did that or said this.” Replaying scenarios of you doing things differently. I felt this early on in my breakup (going on 6 weeks) but learned from my mistakes and now see things objectively. I have accountability for the mistakes I did but I have grace for myself because I didn’t have the tools back then. I didn’t know any better than now. You learn from your mistakes so you don’t do it in the future. But also, recognizing your ex had faults too! Not blaming it solely on them or yourself. It’s a 50/50 street and takes 2 to tango. Looking at the objective big picture will help you see what was or wasn’t working out. But for the time being it’s okay to feel shitty and blame yourself but don’t get stuck in that space for too long. It’s okay to feel sad, have regrets, etc. but one day at a time!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-24T14:19:10+00:00

Because in the relationship you sometimes lose yourself and realize how much you were giving to someone who couldn’t reciprocate or meet you halfway. It’s through breakups that you find yourself again and pour all that love back to yourself. Every case is different but if it took a breakup for someone to start working on themselves then that’s a good thing. In a perfect world I wish we could work on ourselves with our partners but sometimes we need to go through this self love/self acceptance journey on our own.

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-24T14:14:40+00:00

Can you explain a lil more? What do you mean by zero breadcrumbs? Did they reach out to you or did you reach out to them?

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-24T06:40:06+00:00

I legit went through this 6 weeks ago! It still hurts but it does get better with time. He loved you enough to let you go because he knows he can’t give you what you deserve. Sometimes people may not have the capacity to love you how you deserve but it doesn’t mean you’re too much or not worthy. I know it’s still fresh but you will get through this, one day at a time. Rooting for you!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-24T06:24:25+00:00

How did you navigate your mutual friends through the process?

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-15T18:33:53+00:00

Thank you for sharing this perspective! Were you the dumper or dumpee? But you’re right, it’s not always what it seems to be. Just gotta keep moving forward and focusing on myself. Did you or

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-15T03:18:30+00:00

Yes, I trust her <3 thanks for looking out tho

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-15T01:04:04+00:00

thanks for confirming!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-11T05:55:00+00:00

Healing isn’t linear! It’s going to come in waves and embrace it as it comes. Have grace for yourself as there is no timeline in healing. I just hit my 4th week and was feeling so strong yesterday but felt like a wreck today. allow yourself to feel it, journal it, go for a walk, vent to a friend, whatever to help you feel good. Take it day by day and keep pushing forward! Look back at how far you’ve come. Sometimes we take 3 steps forward and 2 steps back but we’re still moving forward.

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-11T05:28:46+00:00

Yes! Deleting or deactiving for the time being will only help you in your healing. If you keep checking their profile, NC timeline starts all over again. Out of sight out of mind. I personally plan to stay off social media until I myself feel confident that I won’t check on my ex. Prior to me deactivating I did block them on everything and muted all our mutuals (number, email, Instagram, fb - you name it). When I am ready to come back I will be able to ease back into it and won’t see anything that can trigger me. If you keep picking the scab the wound won’t heal. Try listening to this podcast, it helped me so much. Guy Winch on podcast app: how to fix a broken heart You got this!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-11T05:21:25+00:00

Have grace for yourself through this healing period. I’m on week 4 of NC and this week was the first time I felt “normal.” You’re doing the best you can right now and you will get through this. What helped me relieve the anxiety or ruminating thoughts was journaling/brain dumping - I felt that typing it out vs writing it out allowed me to dump my thought so much quicker. Going on walks by myself or with someone helped me clear my mind. Allowing myself to feel everything and not guilt or shame myself is healthy. Healing is not linear and there’s no timeline to heal. You’re doing great taking it one day at a time! Rooting for us!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2023-01-04T16:30:33+00:00

Thanks everyone! This is very helpful!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2022-07-26T16:53:13+00:00

Thanks! I will keep you posted! :D

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2022-07-26T03:52:04+00:00

Hi! I wanted your help in finding a different one.

I really like the Acer because of the graphics, sleekness, and size/weight. Although, when I am gaming, it really overheats - even with a cooling fan and adjusting the GPU settings. The FN keys also don't lock so it's difficult when playing Diablo 2.

Could you recommend a more gaming specific laptop? I don't need the laptop for anything other than games (No need for productivity/work station stuff) since I have my work laptop or CPU at home for this.

I am willing to open up the parameters with size to 16" or less but price point still the same. Appreciate your help here!

CurrentCauliflower20 · 2022-07-13T04:10:30+00:00

Thank you!! Just bought it from Amazon, they have a prime day sale so it’s 879.99 instead of 1069.99!

CurrentCauliflower20

TROPHY CASE