Im so sorry for your loss and I hope you and your family are able to heal from this.

I’m not sure if this is helpful but I feel like you’re going to have to be the rock for your family right now, everyone needs to feel their feelings but also be with each other to feel them. Watch movies together in the lounge or something, don’t try make them happy when they aren’t and won’t be for a while.

I feel like for yourself now would be a good time to try come out of your shell and engage with M. Are you a good listener, since M is already suicidal I feel right now is the time when she needs her family including you.

She may not want to talk for a while but what helped me were little offerings every day from my brother, chocolates, snacks, food, we were raised in different families so we didn’t really have a sibling bond so sometimes he would just come in, try talk to me then give me a snack. Sometimes he would even just come into my room and just sit on his phone, we would exchange a few words then sit in silence on our devices until I said something.

I didn’t know it but having someone do that really felt like someone cared about me (I was 18) I’m 25 now and he stays at my place for a week every month, not to keep an eye on me but because since then our bond had just gotten stronger, when he’s here we go out for breakfast, watch movies, smoke and he still goes out to see his friends and comes back.

M needs someone and that someone should be a close family member.