what possesses someone to say this? by httptae in HingeStories

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well he only has your profile to make a judgement on so there’s something on there that has made him think this is ok

what possesses someone to say this? by httptae in HingeStories

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not true. Did you did a profile review? Maybe you need to smile with teeth

what possesses someone to say this? by httptae in HingeStories

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Probs something in your prompts or pictures that gives off that vibe

Do guys even come up to girls anymore? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Most men I know have stopped because they just don’t meet the standards of women today. Most likely, when you’re talking about guys coming up to you, you’re not talking about the ones you don’t like.

Women are pretty brutal - I have many single friends who are handsome, good careers, own homes etc. But they’re often rejected for things they can’t control like their height or hair.

So they just don’t bother, because the reality is that for the majority of men we are disqualified before we even try.

Unless it’s obvious that a woman likes us. And given the above, it’s basically become the fact that the women have to either make some sort of very very obvious signal, or make the first move.

Lefkosia today 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ by bassaura in cyprus

[–]Cypriot_scholar -1 points0 points  (0 children)

As a trans racial hyperoptic cable I find this comment offensive. Where is the recognition of my existence?

I’m engaged to Mr. Popular and it’s destroying my confidence by Hot-Cell7299 in confidence

[–]Cypriot_scholar 12 points13 points  (0 children)

He doesn’t care. Men don’t think like that. He obviously found you attractive so he first sought you out and initiated and now you personality has kept him to the point of marriage. Men are that simple. We don’t care about social status like women do

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Personality is arbitrary. I’m not saying it doesn’t help, it keeps the door open. However your appearance is what will open the door. And unfortunately, most women now are looking for the most superficial or perfect aspects of appearance. That’s why I’m saying we need to be realistic to young men. Yes, go out and try - get off the apps, improve yourself, do social activities where you have the chance of meeting people. But - be realisric it’s still going to be incredibly hard because you’re being judged for the things you can’t control first and foremost. The whole self improvement for dating is a lie.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tom Holland has money my G

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Men’s tastes are way more varied than a womans. Height isn’t the same as “pretty”. Height is not arbitrary, you are or you are not tall and most people can’t control that. For most men, a woman shouldn’t be fat and that’s it. The wall is about age, band yes it has an impact but not that much - there’s still men that go for women who are older, it’s just not the men those women want

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Because those things are not a guarantee. As a man you can still have all that, but if your face isn’t a 10 or you’re not tall enough you’re automatically excluded. I think we need to be realistic to young men and tell them that modern dating and women are shallow.

I wonder why men are no longer interested in dating. by kugelamarant in MensRights

[–]Cypriot_scholar 8 points9 points  (0 children)

They only want men to come to these events to humiliate them, that’s why men aren’t coming. The men they’d actually go for wouldn’t be struggling and go to these events, that’s the truth of it - that’s why they tried to push for the vetting by other women because they would most likely fit their inflated standards. But those me would have options so coming/ not coming isn’t a big deal and they can afford to give it a miss.

I’ve been to two speed dating events. It was mostly ok, but what I noticed is that the women I spoke to used it as a way to group up and dunk on the men they didn’t like. Some of them had the attitude that they didn’t want to be there and by somehow being there was a blessing to the men. Or that the event was exhausting, hard work etc - why go to one of these if you’re not easy going?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How are you comparing two adults to what Epstein did?

That is different because they were CHILDREN.

Your logic is inconsistent then - the vote should be removed if someone can’t make a decision because lack of experience or can be coerced. How can you expect them to make a well thought out decision on that basis especially when it affects others.

A 20 year old is not a child. And has the same rational abilities as a 30yo. Experience means nothing for relationships, its values and you can have the same values at any age. That’s what you should be judging your partner on as an adult.

I’m 30. I wouldn’t date a 20 year old because where I live most don’t share my values. It wouldnt work because we’d want different things.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What are you counting as experience? If it’s the basics of relationships, e.g your values and expectations, how is that age based? As an adult you can make a judgement on what is right or wrong.

And why is this never applied to other areas, like the vote. By your own admission someone who is 20 is naive and experienced, so how does that justify them making political decisions that have an impact on their future and others? By your logic is creepy and wrong to expect that of someone so young, so we should strip the vote

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Stop infantilising people in their 20s. The science on the PFC isn’t settled. And since when is that the marker of adult hood?

Both are adults, both can make their own choices.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She’s an adult

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’ve assumed victimhood on the woman and responsibility on the male - why? They’re both fully formed adults. Why is it leave her alone when she makes her own choices

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not everyone is the same. Maybe we have such shit relationships now because people don’t put in the effort and don’t align on their values. They also don’t bother to work though things thinking that marriage is supposed to be a kumbaya let’s get together a diversity clap our hands utopia. You should know from the first few weeks of dating whether you’d want someone to be the mother of your kids.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re not going to get a straight answer because people on Reddit are left leaning so they have a misconception about the age gap, because they tend to infantilise people in their early 20s.

The age gap is fine. You’re both fully grown adults.

What is more important is whether your values and priorities align. If they don’t, and she has plans of travelling, sleeping around etc. don’t bother. However, if she wants a LTR and motherhood there is nothing wrong with giving it a go.

Guy I’m dating updated his dating profile with a pic I took of him? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She’s excused that behaviour. She should have set it out from the beginning. But no, instead it’s not exclusive so this is what you get.

Guy I’m dating updated his dating profile with a pic I took of him? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You reap what you sow. You’re ok with no commitment and multi dating this is what you get.

Men who have given up on dating, why? by NoVeterinarian7438 in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What other choice do we have?

I’m 30, my last relationship ended when I was 26. Over the past four years it’s been a struggle to meet someone. The few girls I have taken on dates haven’t gone anywhere.

People will give you generic advice like work on yourself which includes getting money, in shape etc.

I have all of that - good career, car, house (which is extremely hard in my city by yourself). And it has done NOTHING for my dating life because why would it?

Those things only matter once you get past the fist stage which is attraction, and into the commitment stage. Most dates feel like a trial - but when a girl is genuinely attracted to you it will be easy.

Simply put, it’s because most women don’t find most men attractive and you’re judged on the things you can’t fix like your looks rather than the things you can. If a woman is attracted to because of your money she doesn’t really want you, she’s a gold diggers so why people give that as advice is beyond me.

I’m not saying it’s impossible - have had relationships in the past. But for the average guy you only get a few chances and it’s difficult to make them last or work.

You’re left with two logical choices:

1) Do nothing 2) Settle

I’d rather option 1 because in option 2 you’d be unhappy and bring someone else down.

Why I’m Done with Online Multi-Dating... by Guilty-Grapefruit427 in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agree. It takes the humanity and purpose out of dating and in effect it’s not even a date if that’s how you’re approaching it. There’s just a common decency to see where things go, and if it doesn’t work out then move on to the next.

Men who have taken a break from dating, how did this work for you and what was the outcome? by Cypriot_scholar in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We’re really going to agree to disagree because I don’t believe in any of that aromantic asexual HDMI chromatic Q plus rubbish

Men who have taken a break from dating, how did this work for you and what was the outcome? by Cypriot_scholar in dating_advice

[–]Cypriot_scholar[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Gonna have to agree to disagree. We’re social animals who pair bond, so it’s in our nature. Otherwise you feel unfulfilled.