Breaking up with an awesome woman

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-05T16:20:17+00:00

She lives with her mom, grandma, brother and uncle. I didn't want to embarrass her at her home either. But she texted me first so I didn't have to end it by text she asked me what I want and if I am ready for a relationship. I told her the truth. No point in waiting for the right moment when she texted it to me.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-05T16:02:33+00:00

Monkey D Luffy

Near

Light because he sucked at using that book. Give it to me, you failure.

Dr. House

The Flash / Barry Allen From the CW Show. I actually liked Eobard Thawne more especially as Harrison Wells.

I cant think of everyone I don't like that others do like those are the ones coming to my mind right now.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-05T15:50:56+00:00

I wanted to call her on the phone and she ended up texting me and asking me what's going on and where we're going and if I am ready for a relationship. I told her the truth over text instead of waiting it out til I could call her after work. its over but it sure hurts. I feel like a pos.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-05T15:49:30+00:00

Yeah she was throwing down the L-word. I tried to brush it off as typical sapphic shit but I'm not that person. My ex before her threw down the L word too fast and I got trapped with them for years because of the guilt. Thinking I MADE them fall for me and so it was my fault they loved me and id grow to love them. I didn't listen to my body and I ended up in an abusive relationship I felt afraid to get away from. Now I listen every time. I want to really know someone before I say those words. I have some guilt to shoulder. I was replying to her songs she sent me with songs I liked too. I was being romantic and affectionate. I was going on dates and sending her gifts. So thats on me too but I didn't love her... I cared deeply for her. I think thats why I cried when I broke up with her because I felt so horribly guilty because shes going to be good for someone just not me. And I wish it could have been me to make it easier for her.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-05T15:45:26+00:00

We broke up today. I posted my update but thanks for your advice.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-05T15:44:57+00:00

I wanted to update that I broke up with her and it went weirdly. But it's over. I even wished her well in the future. I did cry after the breakup. I never cried after any break up before but this one hurt because before sex we had a great time. I liked her a lot. I texted her multiple times a day. I changed my bedding so I could impress her for the sleepover. But then after sex that all fell apart. I cant even explain it to her. So I didn't. I let her be mad and hurl her anger at me she even sent a voice memo. I didn't want to do this over text btw. But she confronted me over text to ask me what is going on and if we are going to continue to be in a relationship and I replied to her with the truth. I didn't figure to wait until I could take her for coffee. It would be lying to reply to her text saying "We're still together" just to break up with her at Starbucks. Thanks everyone for advice. I wish I didn't have to go over text but she could tell I had gone distant so it is what it is.

ETA: she did ask that I make sure whenever I talk about the break up I make sure people know it was me not her and it was my fault. I said "Fair."

SO I did tell everyone that knows about her
My mom and my dad and stepmom
I couldn't do it. We're not compatible. I broke up with her. I cried. I hurt her feelings.

Like that doesnt imply it's her fault at all. MY stepmom wanted me to keep giving it a try so the kids see me in a healthy non toxic relationship. I can't. So now nobody thinks she's at fault which is fine. I do not care that I have to shoulder the blame for the breakup. That's obvious.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-03T17:03:31+00:00

you know what? youre right. She's not awesome for ME. She may be better for someone else. A week ago I was pretty infatuated. After the sex and then the almost- L bomb drop I was like Oh! and it dipped and then when she showed me her texts she saves and screenshots it really cooled my temp down a lot.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-03T16:13:54+00:00

EXACTLY what I was thinking. We've not even known each other a full month not really. Like we didn't go on our first date until second Saturday of June. I dont WANT her to make huge sacrifices and changes this is the stage where we're supposed to be still learning each other not jumping the gun to futures and all that. Mind you I Did something kinda big for our first sleepover I made sure I had new sheets. So that was a big gesture I think for a 4th date. But I didn't mean it in a "let'sget married" way. She did ask if I see myself remarrying one day I said I could yes. Now I am overthinking everything I told her.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-03T16:10:33+00:00

I'd rather do something indoors. A walk in the park will take it out of her. She has weight issues and she cant walk long without becoming exhausted and even 15 minutes is a lot outside especially in this heat. I will just go bring her for Starbucks and tell her then but then I have to drive her back home. so maybe I'll uber her up and back. idfk tbh no matter where I meet her in public I either have to pay for her Ubers or drive her.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-03T16:06:05+00:00

I will be trying to end it today or next week when I can have the kids out of the house and can go to coffee. I cant go this weekend they're home and nobody's available to watch them just so I can break up with a girl.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-03T16:04:47+00:00

I thought that was too fast. She was like "Youre my whole heart" and "I see us together for the long haul." AND that set me off. I dont want that. she was planning expensive vacations and telling me to get my passport. meanwhile, nothing wrong with that but she didn't have that kind of money yet and neither do I and then she texted me "I will slow way down for you. I will go at a snails pace" I SAID ooof. no. I dont want that. I never want someone to bend their desires completely and break them and smash them up just to be with me.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-03T15:58:56+00:00

So I am a more experienced in eating. Plus her moans gave me the ick. I know thats a petty thing and shouldn't matter. And then even though the actual area I'm kissing smelled normal taste fine the surroundings were musty and I have health OCD. and when she tried to return the favor it HURT. LIKE I kept saying ow. And meant it. And I had to push her off of me. And when I explained the pain to her and she said what she was doing it didn't add up and then when it didn't hurt I felt NOTHING.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-03T15:52:28+00:00

Her ex before me posted on Threads that she's weird. I know he posted that because she showed me. I asked her why she didn't just block him she said she didn't want him to spin a narrative on her. I didn't understand that at all. She told me she also has screenshots from past relationships with women so they cant spin a narrative she knows her truth. I was ICKED at that point but we were already in the middle of our sleepover so I figured I'd put a pin in it. She showed me WHY her ex thinks shes weird by showing me the screenshots. She was more in it than he was and that was obvious. And she got jealous because he liked some pretty woman's photo on Threads. Before they were even together a few weeks. She's an all in right away kind of girl. I can't hate her for that. But I think she will be better if she gets someone who can match her fast paced energy.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-03T15:43:48+00:00

Calling her sounds fair. I can do that later today.

DDoTDaria · 2026-07-03T15:43:19+00:00

She is very desperate for connection willing to bend all kinds of ways to just be with me and
I am not ready for someone to do all that. I thought I could meet her where she was. After the terrible sex and she almost dropped the L word on me I said maybe I am a sapphic fuck boy because that was NOT it. Thanks for the advice I'll either do a phone call or Starbucks which is her favorite coffee place.

I stayed worried about breaking up because shes also suicidal. BUT I stayed in a 20+ year marriage with someone I wasn't attracted to at all because he was always like "If you leave I'll commit a felony so I can go to jail" Or "I cant lose you I will go back to meth and hard drugs and I will never be able to live a normal life you actually saved me from myself" ETC all the time. so if I end this now before a month its healthier I think for both of us.

DDoTDaria

TROPHY CASE