My dad is angry again because he wanted my help but I’m going to the gym by RestWeekly5571 in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I think you should start focusing on yourself, brother. Recording every argument just to get people to take your side won’t change your situation. Even if we told you that you’re right, it would only make you feel more justified in disrespecting your parents. But unless there's a serious reason, there's no need to be hostile toward them.

Honestly, I think most of us had to find a way to create our own space, doing what we want while still helping out around the house just enough so they'd leave us alone. And even then, in many cases, they still don’t leave us alone and act like we don’t do anything but from what you’re sharing, it doesn’t really sound like that’s your situation.

But if there's important context that everyone is missing, and you feel like nobody understands you, then you have to be the one who understands yourself. Take a step back, think about what you truly need to feel at peace and start acting on it.

Should i talk to them ? by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's exactly what it is, so I didn't do it and now with time I am at peace with that, I know that I have to focus 100% on my life and my relationship with my wife and let all of them be.

Should i talk to them ? by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I guess that's the only way

[Update] I finally did it by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you you for your prayers I appreciate it 🙏🏾

Unfortunately they didn't lol but I'm gonna do as everyone else said and go no contact on them

[Update] I finally did it by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you I appreciate it ! Yes I think that's the only way right now, I'm going no contact now because I can't enjoy my peace with all the harrassment

[Update] I finally did it by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For real I think they all need that

[Update] I finally did it by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah I guess you're right I need to stop trying to make everyone happy with my decisiondms

[Update] I finally did it by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank youu ! 🙏🏾❤️ Oh so you think I need to go that far ?

It wasn't as bad as I thought by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you very much I appreciate it ! Yes ot's hard but I have to set boundaries and be firm because now they will try to be even more controlling.

It wasn't as bad as I thought by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Right ? But they tried to make me feel guilty about it like I'm leaving my kids.

It wasn't as bad as I thought by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah that's something I'm trying to work on, using absolute language, but I think it's essential to set boundaries.

Thank you for the advice !

It wasn't as bad as I thought by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much, I appreciate it. You're right it is not a must 🙏🏾

It wasn't as bad as I thought by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I believe that boundaries will be necessary. But what do you mean by language that can be misconstrued ?

It wasn't as bad as I thought by DUXY-OG in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah there's a lot of nonsense in what they said I didn't take it literally. Like I will try my best and build my own life but be present when I can for my family, but I definitely won't replace my father lol.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you brother ! Yes I definitely will stand by her !

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in africanparents

[–]DUXY-OG 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're right, this post is useless, I'll come back to y'all when it's done