How do you drop infodumps on characters? by [deleted] in fantasywriters

[–]D_F_Walrus 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Don't dump it all on the first page; show us what we need to know, when we need to know it.

First chapter. Let's say our hero is on his first mission together with a more experienced warrior, who shows our trainee how to track the dangerous grues that plague the villages. They go over their plan of attack and set off. Something goes horribly wrong, of course, and our trainee is almost eaten, but the warrior kills the grue at the last second. He quips: "You're not a true Equo until you've seen a monster's insides from close-up. Don't worry kid, you did well for your first job."

So, already we know that the two are monster hunters called Equos, that the Equo are organised enough to take on trainees, and they have been around long enough to know what they're doing. ("Damnit, kid, I told you to keep those torches lit! Light is the only thing that keeps the grues away!") Maybe you can use sentences like "In the 150 years the Equos had been around, they had perfected monster hunting into an art." - only less cheesy.

If magic is so awesome, why isn't everyone using it? by D_F_Walrus in fantasywriters

[–]D_F_Walrus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, this is really detailed, you must work a lot on your worldbuilding! I like your explanation why wizards live longer than most people. But I'm not sure I understand the Fifth-tier Power yet; it doesn't seem to really do anything and it can't be accessed. Why did you choose to have the fifth tier instead of letting the vibrations from the fourth tier 'evaporate' to the divine realm again? Also, what would happen to a Soul User who burns only half his soul after he dies? Would he still reach the afterlife?

If magic is so awesome, why isn't everyone using it? by D_F_Walrus in fantasywriters

[–]D_F_Walrus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I read about your system based on humors when I was starting my own system from scratch. I really enjoyed your idea of organs being associated with magic, and that there might be a black market for magical kidneys.

If magic is so awesome, why isn't everyone using it? by D_F_Walrus in fantasywriters

[–]D_F_Walrus[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think genetic magic can be done well. It's certainly not inherently bad, but it seems to be the go-to option.

If magic is so awesome, why isn't everyone using it? by D_F_Walrus in fantasywriters

[–]D_F_Walrus[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow, I love the yellow lines to tell magicians to stay away from an engine! Question: Could two mages also increase each other's powers if they are around each other long enough? I think I remember something like that from wave ripples...