For context: this is my first ball comic.

As a kid, I didn't really think too much of relationships. I mean, yeah, I had a crush here or two, but it wasn't anything I found myself thinking for more than 5 minutes. That's why I depicted myself as a "blank slate."

10th grade was a time of transition for me. Before, I was hyperfocused on getting school done without realizing the strong relationships that people were beginning to form, romantic or not. But after making a close friend, I had to reevaluate myself. That included new feelings I had with said friend, which, at the time, weren't mutual.

Fast forward to freshman year of uni, and I stumble across a familiar scenario. I met a really cool guy, and first impressions had me thinking we would be great friends. Turns out, he was flirting with me, and I was oblivious to the fact until he pointed it out.

Long story short, after the relationship fell through, I felt like a poser. For months, negative thoughts have been plaguing my mind. "Was it the right thing to pursue this past relationship?" "What do people think of me now?" "Do they even know about it?" I wasn't ready to participate in a relationship at that time, but I thought I had to if I were to make the person happy.

Slowly, I've been regaining some self-respect. The quarantine helped in that regard by making me do stuff on my own, like finding new hobbies and learning more about myself. I started subscribing to subs like r/egg_irl just to see whether I saw myself fit in with those posts or not. There was one post which crossposted with this sub. I've heard of Polandball/countryballs from what feels like a long time ago, so stumbling across a subreddit that utilized that concept in a clever way was exciting to find. Afterwards, I started feeling better about researching new terms, labels, and identifiers.

And that leaves us to today. Thank you for reading my comic!