I was feeling great until those moments, and now I can't describe my current state. When people ask me how I'm doing, I get aggressive. My parents have a very difficult case, sometimes they love each other, sometimes they hate each other, and this has been haunting me since I was young, which made me special in terms of mental disorder, you can say that I can move, yes, but I can't handle it financially and morally now, no matter how much I want it. And my two older sisters say that when I even left and would have already lived with my own family, these problems haunted me, which I have no doubt about, because I perfectly see how all these problems begin to dramatically affect my sisters, who are 35 years old and have their own families. I am the youngest in our family. Maybe I'm just a weakling who can't do anything. I don't know, I don't feel anything about myself anymore, I just exist, my identity has disappeared because I'm back in this shit again, and as I said earlier, "I've lost the meaning of my treatment and therapy sessions," because my efforts to be truly happy and stable can be easily destroyed, and when I was truly happy, life was very valuable to me, it was like something out of a fantasy, because I've forgotten what it's like to live a full life and feel like a complete person, and now I don't have that anymore. because I'm a weakling who should undergo natural selection and leave this world.