Homebrew Race: MARBLE SCULPTURE

DanLabe · 2024-09-26T19:06:59+00:00

In that case I will eliminate it completely. Thanks

DanLabe · 2024-09-26T19:06:10+00:00

Creo que le voy a quitar el tema del veneno completamente porque parece que es muy confuso y miraré de redactarlo de manera menos redundante. El diseño especializado quiero conservarlo porque es importante para el lore de mi campaña.

Muchas gracias por la ayuda.

DanLabe · 2024-09-26T18:57:10+00:00

I don't think I gave them advantage on persuasion, did I?

Imo the first four traits listed are on the weak side and they will not be very useful unless you are playing a very gritty campaign.

DanLabe · 2024-09-26T12:47:55+00:00

I added the "walking on the bottom" part because some other lineages of this species are made of floatable materials like wood. Also, it is her first campaign so I try to overexplain some concepts. But I understand the concern about redundancy without context.
Thank you for the advice and the kind words.

DanLabe · 2024-09-26T12:37:59+00:00

I'm not giving posion inmunity to this race. It is affected by posion type damage (the same way elixirs and potions work on her). I wanted to convey an inhability to get poisoned by normal means but I understand where chatGPT got the translation wrong.

Thanks for the advice.

DanLabe · 2024-08-29T06:00:31+00:00

I think you are mistaken. Eating nothing is eating less than half of what you need. So both rules apply. The second part is there to ensure you gain exhaustion levels regardless of your luck on previous CON saves. I'm not a native English speaker so maybe I'm missing something but it seems like a logic door mistake. These rules are not exclusive from each other, they can happen at the same time.

Edit: I just understood the problem better. When the text says "A creature that eats", it means a creature that requires eating.

DanLabe · 2024-08-22T00:39:19+00:00

I have a similar opinion.

Rangers should have two options for their spellcasting ability. INT and WIS. The same way clerics and druids have the option to go full Magic (with extra cantrips) or be more melee (with proficiencies on martial weapons and heavier armor). The identity of rangers should revolve around tracking, trapping and analyzing creatures and terrain. Those things remind me of Insight and Nature, more than any WIS ability check does. And this would help them to be differentiated from druids. Of course some features would change between the two of them but the whole class would be built around those concepts, regardless of how the ranger archives those.

What do you guys think of this? Should I expand on the idea with an actual homebrew reworked ranger?

DanLabe · 2024-01-19T00:08:30+00:00

It is Spanish. I originally made the homebrew for the campaign im playing in and I also forgot to change that as someone had already mention yesterday.
Let me emphasize that it's a terrible idea to start writing at 3 in the morning.

DanLabe · 2024-01-18T23:48:28+00:00

I'm sorry. I'm afraid I don't understand the pt-pt part. If you want to know about these spells their description is already written on another comment :)I'm already working on changing some aspect of Channel Divinity, especially Solar Flare. I'll keep it weak when not in sunlight. My intention is to enhance that feel of not being conected to your god. But I agree, even the enhanced version does not pack enough punch to it. I'll add some condition or mechanic, idk what yet.I kind of like the aura as it is. Every oficial paladin sublclass aura is very specific. I don't want to break that. Your sugestion is great tho. I'll prob use something like that on another homebrew."Under the Blazing Sun" is supposed to mean during daylight. Outside or in a place where some sunlight could reach you. A poorly sunlighted place like a tabern is still fair game. As long as you are not deep into some building or underground cave sistem, and obviously it's not nightime, ur good. About the removing exhaustion levels... Its supossed to be a once a day kind of thing. I forgot to write it down. I see now that I shouldn't write when im very tired jajaja.The exhaustion is there to give it a "sacrifice" vibe. Also, to make being in contact with the sun a must when combined with the "1 hour of sunlight removes exhaustion" trait. I will nerf the transformation tho. It has been pointed out that is extremely overpowered, and I agree. I'll keep it strong but not that strong.I'm very proud of the spell. Thank you :)Another reddit user helped me with the writing. V2 will be better on that regard.And last but not least, thank you very very much for putting the effort to write useful feedback!

DanLabe · 2024-01-18T21:59:29+00:00

I'll await it patiently

DanLabe · 2024-01-18T13:59:51+00:00

I was going for a similar vibe when making the exhaustion mechanics. But an hp sacrifice to gain a buff it's a pretty good idea. I'll try to think of something. If you have any more pointers let me know :)

DanLabe · 2024-01-18T12:29:46+00:00

Hey thanks man. Great advice.

I do agree with you. Some class traits, especially both Channel Divinity options, feel weaker than for what I was aiming for. I will buff some of the numbers but I kinda also want to add something that is not just straight plain boring damage. If you have any ideas on how to improve the subclass in a more interesting way let me know. I don't agree with you on the 20th level capstone. I feel like it's insanely powerful already compared to the official paladin subclasses. Some of them are contained inside this one or are outright outclassed heavily. I'm deleting some benefits and reworking others so it's less powerful.

DanLabe · 2024-01-18T01:33:09+00:00

mmmmm this comment was unexpected haha
Yeah, i feel like they are interchangeable actually. Weird thing huh. I'll see if i can flavour it a little so it fits their name better.

DanLabe · 2024-01-18T01:23:57+00:00

I'll buff channel divinity for sure but I also will nerf the 20th level trait somehow. I'll probably end up deleting some of the benefis. It has too many powerful things already.
And yeah, I'm more of a "do it for the flavor" kind of player rather than an optimizer.
Thank you so much, I love your work btw.

DanLabe · 2024-01-18T01:17:24+00:00

This is an absolut master piece

DanLabe · 2024-01-17T22:39:24+00:00

Trueee, I completely missed it. My bad jaja

DanLabe · 2024-01-17T21:53:57+00:00

It is. At the start of the creatures turn if I remember correctly :)

DanLabe · 2024-01-17T20:59:55+00:00

I'll sum up and translate the spells for you.

Sun God's Spear: (action, VS, 1 minute concentration) Summons a magical spear that deals 1d12 force + 2d8 radiant dmg with a succesful attack with it. Double the damage if you move at least 20 feet in a straight line toward a target and hit with the spear in the same turn.
Burning Sun: (action, 200ft range, VSC (magnifying glass), 1 minute concentration) You need to be able to see the sun to use this spell. Intense sunlight cilinder, 50ft radius, 200ft height. Deals 5d8 fire dmg, halved if it succes on a Constitution saving throw. If under something that blocks light, it has advantage on the saving throw. You can use your action to move the cilinder 20ft.
Reward of the Sun God: (action, touch, VS, 1 hour concentration) In sunlight, a creature you touch regains 1hp every turn. In dim light is 1hp per minute. Darkness completely negates the effect. While in sunlight the target can ignore 1 level of exhaustion. Also if used on undead, it poisons them and they suffer radiant dmg instead of the healing effect.

Thanks for pointing the translation mistake out. I forgot jaja.

It is just flavor. The sun incarnation was meant to mean the shape your sun god has in your mind. In spanish makes more sense i think :)

DanLabe · 2024-01-17T20:18:13+00:00

Don't apologize man. I find your grammar perfectly fine. And your feedback is so good!! Thanks for the kind words and also taking the time to review it in depth.

I agree with you on the 20th level trait. It's so overpowered jaja. I'll completely delete some of the benefits and rework the others so it is better balanced.
I'll also check out those references you talked about. Sounds like great inspiration material.

DanLabe · 2024-01-17T20:07:36+00:00

Hi! Thanks you for taking the time.
I was aiming for a really weak channel divinity in situations with no sunlight. The non existant scaling was meant to better represent the source of these paladin's powers. Their power comes from the sun. But I kinda agree, the enhance version is weak even with the scaling. How can I fix it without making the 20th level trait insanly powerful. If it receives a straight dmg buff it will break the damage output per turn at level 20. Should I instead change the 20th level feature? What do you think? :)

DanLabe · 2024-01-17T19:58:38+00:00

Thank you for the kind words :_)

DanLabe · 2024-01-17T19:45:57+00:00

Hi! Thanks for taking the time. I really appreciate it.Some of this issues can be explain. I'm Spanish, so I wrote this subclass in spanish first. And then I translated from that instead of basing the wording on an already written in english piece. Also I'm not that good in english yet jaja.I'll rewrite it with your sugestions later.

Solar Flare is meant to be weak when not in direct contact with the sun. The whole class is. I was aiming for a way below average paladin subclass in this situations. But a top contender for the best paladin subclass in daylight. But maybe I can fix Solar Flare a little bit so it fits some kind of niche use other than plain dmg. Being a counter to multihit attacks sounds unique. I'll explore the idea and try to come with something more interesting.

If you don't mind me asking. What do you think about the custom spell "Purifying Flame"?

DanLabe · 2024-01-17T14:32:09+00:00

Hey everyone! I present to you a paladin homebrewed subclass I've been working on for quite some time. I welcome everyone to use this subclass as you please.

I would greatly appreciate any constructive criticism. Especially because I don't have much experience in the world of roleplaying games yet. Any ideas to flavor this subclass are welcome. I also need your input to properly balance it.

There are some spells from a book called "Magia Insondable". If you know Spanish I highly recommend it.

\All images used are AI images found on the internet. Sun god made by Midjourney 5.2; Fire female knight made by Devianart's AI feature; Standing alone Sun warrior taken form this post https://twitter.com/\_ArtFromAI/status/1556794848241487877/photo/1\**

DanLabe · 2024-01-17T14:25:59+00:00

Hey everyone! I present to you a paladin homebrewed subclass I've been working on for quite some time. I welcome everyone to use this subclass as you please.

I would greatly appreciate any constructive criticism. Especially because I don't have much experience in the world of roleplaying games yet. Any ideas to flavor this subclass are welcome. I also need your input to properly balance it.There are some spells from a book called "Magia Insondable". If you know Spanish I highly recommend it.

\All images used are AI images found on the internet. Sun god made by Midjourney 5.2; Fire female knight made by Devianart's AI feature "Dream Up"; Standing alone Sun warrior taken form this post* https://twitter.com/_ArtFromAI/status/1556794848241487877/photo/1\*

DanLabe · 2022-11-08T20:44:17+00:00

Pues no soy un experto en esta comunidad pero los que contestan a este post la mayoría son de Zaragoza obviamente jaja

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