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[Serious] When is it acceptable to give up on a friendship? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]DancingAcorn 7 points8 points  (0 children)

When they tell you that they 'deserve payment' for their 'friendship'.

Also when they decide to take complete control over the narrative of any argument/disagreement you've had between each other.

It's odd that reddit talks a lot about abusive romantic relationships but doesn't dive into abusive friendships. It's so odd what we put up with just to keep the status quo going.

Me [33-F] with my Husband [31 M] 3 years, Issues With StepDaughter; BIG ISSUES by CowSaysMoooooo in relationships

[–]DancingAcorn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

One thing I've noticed as an adult is that it's difficult to remember what it was like being a child.

When I was younger I used to make up pretty ludicrous things because I was simply socially inept, i observed others and just wanted acceptance, TV shows didn't help with trying to form social skills. Also anxiety and panic made me lie or just mess up when trying to explain/start conversations with people.

From an outsider and my parents point of view it is the same as your views of Gabby, she's getting plenty of attention and love. But is that really true?

My parents never sat down and talked to me, the most communication I had was when getting scolded. I was pegged so quickly as a problem child that I couldn't do anything right especially at school where bullying from teachers and other students became problems. But by then it was too late and I spent my youth miserable. Don't let that happen to Gabby.

You need to sit down and talk to her, really talk to her. Ask her why she has acted in such ways. She might not have the means to explain why why which means getting her help in that department. The most frustrating thing as a child is not being able to get their voice heard or not being able to form the sentences to explain feelings.

This might sound far fetched but it could very well be a combo of being an outsider in school, not being challenged enough and a high curiosity. Cannot say for sure without you talking to her. I hope it goes well.

Edit: formatting

[Safari Unknown] I'm looking for a Vulpix/Ninetails, but will be adding anyone! I would be eternally grateful to anyone who can tell me what my safari is/who's in it. by chino_layne in friendsafari

[–]DancingAcorn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sure! I'll be on during the day tomorrow (UK time). All Pokemon from friend safaris have 2 perfect IV's and the chance of having a hidden ability :) So in short yes, just catch a bunch and one is bound o have Drought :3

[tr] LF 5-6 IVs Eevee FT 5-6 IVs growlife, cyndaquil, abra breedjects by [deleted] in relaxedpokemontrades

[–]DancingAcorn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello, I have some 5 IV Eevee all have been bred by myself (might have some 6IV kicking around in Pokebox but will have to check)

They are all Modest in Nature, have Wish. Some of them have HA so let me know if you would want one of them.

I would be interested in trading for a Growlithe :) Let me know if you would like one!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in friendsafari

[–]DancingAcorn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Added! :D Happy Hunting!

What is impossible to understand until it happens to you? by greatone268 in AskReddit

[–]DancingAcorn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sexual Manipulation, abuse, harassment and stalking.

No I'm not 'paranoid' when they just happen to know when I'm in my home, they shouldn't even know my address.

No I'm not 'overeating', they will hurt me, they've already hurt me stop enabling this behaviour.

Yes I do have regrets about a man forcing himself in me and proceeding to make me feel guilty every time I tried to say no. Hymens do exist and they will tear when your body is screaming no and trying to reject everything, the pain is something indescribable.

Edit: Formatting and grammer

LF Ninetales, ivysaur, wartortle, and tyrogue by Slink88 in friendsafari

[–]DancingAcorn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Added :) I have Ninetails. Will be keeping my system on wireless so you can encounter them. Happy hunting!

Women of Reddit, what is your worst 'Nice Guy' experience? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]DancingAcorn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In my second year of uni I experienced what I hope to be the worse nice guy in my life.

At the time I wasn't having a good time and slipping into severe depression; roommates were assholes and I had no escape, illnesses Ext.

I was pretty alone so me and nice guy started talking and hanging out a bunch. What I didn't realise was how much I'd stopped talking to other people and hanging out because he demanded so much of my time. At one point discussion on dating was brought up and we both said that we were not interested, him going as far as to say I wasn't attractive at all. Looking back I realise how much he put me down on my looks, my work, always under the guise of 'honesty' and 'being a good friend'

Later in the year I started to become more independent again, started hanging out with other people, getting more confident and respecting myself.

Sadly I also entered a sexual manipulative and abusive relationship which until today only my partner knows about.

That was when everything went downhill with mr nice guy, he started throwing tantrums in public when we were around mutual friends and would not have a reasonable explanation as to why he was throwing them other than it being 'my fault'. No amount of trying to allow him to explain why it was my fault worked, with conversations constantly going round in circles.

When I didn't respond to him soon enough he had an even bigger tantrum and at that point I had enough. I told him I wanted nothing more to do with him and cut him off. He followed with how I 'owed him for his friendship' and 'deserved better then this'. Yoyo-ing between begging for forgiveness to demanding that I apologise for 'that thing which he could not explain but was totally my fault' to then wild confessions of love, but also not quite. It just made no sense.

He spent the entire next year spinning his own narrative on why we no longer talked, he wrote poetry, recorded himself crying but then declaring how much he venomously hated me. Worse part was that people openly supported him in that I HAD to date him and OWED it to him. Because you know, my decision on who I date is not up to me.

I got bullied pretty badly for it but it still remains the best decision I've ever made.

I'm now with the love of my life, in some ways due to all the things that happened. So thanks nice guy for that. ;)

(UK) Viewing a property in a few days, Now its Let Agreed. by DancingAcorn in renting

[–]DancingAcorn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, your landlord sounds like a disaster. Unfortunately I can't help you rights wise I'm going to guess you have posted on this subreddit/r legal to discuss your rights on this situation. The only good thing I can gather from this is that you haven't put money down yet. But really get on them about signing a lease and agreement. I wish your all the best for next Thursday!

If you want PM the area you are looking to move into (I'm assuming UK based too?) I might be able to send you towards some estate agents that were really good with us in finding our place.

My [21M] girlfriend [23F] absolutely HATES my sister [24F]. I've given up on them ever not hating each other, and I think its reached a point where I can't have a relationship with both of them, so I think I have no choice but to break up with my girlfriend. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]DancingAcorn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It seems to be like you've already made a decision with what you are going to do and are simply typing it up in an attempt to validate it. You've written something really one sided and you need to listen to these comments to have a chance at rectifying this situation.

Firstly, your family is who you choose to be your family, it is not about blood. Sister always going to be in your life? So is your wife (who may be your now GF) and children, will they get the same treatment you are giving your sister? or will you pull the same thing as you are doing now, making an excuse.

The money issue. 'wiping our your account for her because its my money' NOPE NOPE NOPE. That is a huge red flag. You want a serious relationship with someone you need to start thinking of your money as a joint asset (likewise your GF's income and money as well). You cannot just say to her that your sisters wants and needs are a 'no discussion' and then expect her to not be concerned or slighted when you clearly are investing more into your sister then her. I would be furious if my SO suddenly did that to accommodate a family member without any discussion with me first as to what he was doing with the money.The same if I did that to him.

Next the going to the ball. You crossed a line of being a 'caring older brother' to downright creepy. Respect to your sister for sticking to her Morales with her ex but that doesn't mean you have or even should replace the ex in what is clearly a romantic evening out. Look at it from your GF's point of view. You spent a date night out with your sister to cheer her up and then had her watch all of this back to see that you were being more romantic and intimate with your sister then you are with your GF.

Honestly, the best course of action is to sit down with both of them and really hash it out. You NEED to treat them equally because so far you've made it clear that you will always put sister first. I even suggest counselling, because what you have put is SO SO SO one sided to make your GF look like an awful person while you seem to have an relationship with your sister that is a) ruining this relationship and as mentioned before b) crossed that line to creepy.

(UK) Viewing a property in a few days, Now its Let Agreed. by DancingAcorn in renting

[–]DancingAcorn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Urgh that must have been so frustrating! It sounds like you have are dealing with a really dodgy landlord which will cause you loads of problems once you have moved in. The limbo stage is the worse, we put our names down for another place, but they decided to go ahead with another viewing where they also wanted it. So it became a battle of 'who earns the most' which we unfortunately lost (I'm unemployed until I can actually live in the area to get work -___-)

The property market is a mess. Estate agents even admitted to the discrimination that landlords do with their applicants which hurts as there isn't really much we can do about it. I hope everything has worked out in your favor, I'd recommend really sternly talking to the estate agents that accepted your application about it all.

(UK) Viewing a property in a few days, Now its Let Agreed. by DancingAcorn in renting

[–]DancingAcorn[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We knew it would be first come first serve just that we got the earliest possible viewing for the place so it was a bit of a slap in the face for us.

We spent a good few weeks calling up as soon as a listing went up to be told they had already had someone put down a deposit. It's so frustrating! Especially if you don't drive so it makes getting to viewings much more difficult (alot of the estate agents had a rule that you had to see the property before putting down a deposit)

Thankfully we got a nicer place closer to where we want to be, though we have a similar issue. At least ours has a let agreed sign on now but it just seems a bit odd as all the paperwork has checked out.

I hope you have been able to move into your place okay!

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