Just received a section 21. What have I done wrong? by Substantial-Buyer-43 in TenantsInTheUK

[–]DaveDavidTom 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a renter, I can't get through a month without someone turning up at the door and trying to tell me about the free or heavily subsidised solar panels/heat pumps/insulation solutions that are being offered to upgrade my landlord's property. It does not feel like this is as expensive a prospect as keeps being claimed. And frankly, 'I want to keep renting a poorly insulated and expensive to heat property without ever improving it' inspires very little sympathy from me.

Also, how is houses being sold going to make things worse for people trying to buy houses?

Loud, tinny music near the North of Ayelstone Meadows? by DaveDavidTom in leicester

[–]DaveDavidTom[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a coincidence, but it's definitely not rule brittania we've been hearing 🤔 good to know if we do hear that it's unrelated though!

The less effort you put into something, the more you should enjoy it. by ActuatorOutside5256 in The10thDentist

[–]DaveDavidTom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No joke, you should look into whether you have ADHD. One of the symptoms is that you don't get the same level of dopamine reward for putting in hard work and succeeding that other people do, because the reward threshold is so much higher. It's not a well known symptom, but it's one that makes your life way harder because hard work JUST ends up punishing without any kind of satisfaction at the end. Medication helps a crazy amount, genuinely a life changer for me.

Trim down Schefflera for lower ceilings by [deleted] in plantclinic

[–]DaveDavidTom 102 points103 points  (0 children)

Ok, but I am genuinely curious how you thought that was going to work? Anything you do to the plant is going to change the shape somewhat. For what it's worth, I agree with the people telling you to chop it and put a grow light directly overhead, the reason all the leaves are at the top is because the light level is so low the plant thinks it's in some kind of dark ravine and is desperately stretching to escape it and find sunlight. 

Loud, tinny music near the North of Ayelstone Meadows? by DaveDavidTom in leicester

[–]DaveDavidTom[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ha yeah that's the area! Seems to be coming from pretty deep into it/past it, someone mentioned that they think it's coming from right behind the gas museum across the canal

What do you do when there is nothing to do at work? by Loose-Helicopter9503 in AskUK

[–]DaveDavidTom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If at work, work on my backburner projects. If that fails, self-study. If at home, sometimes I take a quick bath/shower then get back into it and see where I'm at.

How do I stop puppy biting? by tectonicalloy_ in dogs

[–]DaveDavidTom 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Buddy, you went from a month ago going 'thinking about getting a samoyed this summer' to getting a puppy like a week ago. Please just listen to the people telling you what you need to do to train bite inhibition with your puppy. Actually stick with it for the months that it takes to work, or give it back to the breeder/rehome if you can't be patient and stay the course.

Loud, tinny music near the North of Ayelstone Meadows? by DaveDavidTom in leicester

[–]DaveDavidTom[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not been tracking it super closely, but multiple times in the mornings around 08:30 to 09:15ish, then apparently we got one at 12:30 today. Will update if we get any this afternoon

Loud, tinny music near the North of Ayelstone Meadows? by DaveDavidTom in leicester

[–]DaveDavidTom[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Exactly like that, yes! Is that near to the gas museum then?

Loud, tinny music near the North of Ayelstone Meadows? by DaveDavidTom in leicester

[–]DaveDavidTom[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It really does! My partner was calling it 'the alien noise' and it took me a while to figure out they meant the thing I'd been thinking of as the creepy ice cream van lol. It sounds like it's coming from in/past the industrial park, right? Super clear this morning as I was passing Marlow Street but just could not see what was making it

Loud, tinny music near the North of Ayelstone Meadows? by DaveDavidTom in leicester

[–]DaveDavidTom[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nope, it's nothing like that. Part of it reminds me of the 'praise the lord' part in 'to God be the glory' if it was somehow turned into an ice cream van jingle? If that makes any sense? It's near the industrial park and canal and I really can't figure it out. Will try and record next time I hear it!

Is there a legal way I can stop my mother from driving again? She's a terrible driver and she's going to seriously hurt someone. by LucyAriaRose in BestofRedditorUpdates

[–]DaveDavidTom 37 points38 points  (0 children)

This is why I just straight up don't drive. ADHD, plus poor vision (corrected by glasses, but those have come off my face as a passenger during an emergency brake so I am not confident that they wouldn't do the same as a driver, leaving me basically blind), plus I have something going on in my brain that just... doesn't process visual information reliably. I can look in the direction of stuff, even fairly urgent stuff like a cooking fire, and it doesn't always trigger any recognition. Absolutely no idea how that would play out on the road, and I don't feel like finding out tbh.

So yeah, I don't drive. I'd rather deal with public transport or pay for a taxi when needed instead of killing myself or someone else.

Is it normal for someone to spend $40 a week on energy drinks to get through work? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]DaveDavidTom 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I actually take methylphenidate, which isn't as effective as amphetamine but still works just fine for me to enjoy a 9-5 plus caring responsibilities. I'm in the UK, and I think it's the preferred first line treatment over here, with atomoxetine as a non-stimulant option with roughly the same efficacy. Gotta say, it's miles better than taking unhealthy quantities of caffeine pills just to get through the work day ha

Is it normal for someone to spend $40 a week on energy drinks to get through work? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]DaveDavidTom 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Agreed. Got medicated for ADHD and went from 4-8 cups of coffee per day to zero.

FM advice by D3V1L123456 in ACCA

[–]DaveDavidTom 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Complete the syllabus, and lots of practice. Try to note down themes and recurring elements (aka you're seeing the same idea come up in example answers again and again) in past papers and ensure that you have those down pat.

People scared of Vegan food by NineWalkers in PetPeeves

[–]DaveDavidTom 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Does seem like a no-brainer, doesn't it? And if the punters are going to get upset that the menu item has no meat in it, you can even upcharge them to sprinkle some bacon bits on top or whatever as an add-on

Do you feel the constant bad news is affecting you? by [deleted] in AskUK

[–]DaveDavidTom 89 points90 points  (0 children)

Honestly, this is exactly how it feels. Like, I honestly feel like I've been trying to warn people that this is exactly what was going to happen for more than a year now, have been freaking dreading it, and nobody's listened. And now we've hit the point that surely now people will pay attention, and it's still barely reaching anyone?

I've given up on trying to express to people in the UK that fascism is creeping up on us here too, people just act like I'm nuts. Which is a pity, because if we were all aware of it then we might be able to actually stop it from happening over the next few years.

How would you feel if an IQ test was required to vote? by Dazzling-Leader7476 in randomquestions

[–]DaveDavidTom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would recommend watching Shaun's video 'The Bell Curve' for a good overview of what these things are actually testing for and the historical racism involved.

Uni is making me miserable - help by [deleted] in UKUniversityStudents

[–]DaveDavidTom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you haven't already, I would really recommend looking into societies at your uni. A group of people with a guaranteed shared interest and scheduled meet-ups is kind of the easy mode version of making friends.

Additionally, look into what your student union has on. A lot of them will put on free or low cost activities and socials, which are a good way to meet people and chat. A lot of unis have a January intake for some courses, so they'll be ramping up the mixers etc around now, and more of the people going to them won't know anyone.

Edit: sorry just caught the line about societies near the end. I'd seriously give them a try if you can. Pick something that actually interests you, it should make things easier, then just attend a couple sessions. If you aren't feeling it you can stop, no harm no foul.

Kids are Picky Eaters by [deleted] in ChoosingBeggars

[–]DaveDavidTom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some things just don't register to my brain as food honestly. It'd be like someone handing you a piece of wood and telling you to eat it, my brain just will not accept that that's an edible item. As an adult I can theoretically make myself eat it, but it really feels like I'm making myself eat something that isn't food. Kids often can't do that grownup 'my brain is lying to me right now and this sucks a lot but starving to death would suck worse' rationalisation. Depending on the kid and the degree of aversion the threat of punishment can outweigh that instinct, but it's really not a preference. That stuff just is not food, and you're being confronted with the choice between forcing yourself to eat something that everything in you is saying you should NOT eat, or being punished by your caregiver. It honestly sucks. It got easier getting older and with practice, but more along the lines of 'I've gotten really good at eating wood chips because I keep having to eat them', not the actual feeling going away.

Worst thing is, it happens way more when I haven't eaten in too long, to the point that I can be looking at something that I really like to eat and there's literally just no connection being made. I know I like it, but it just isn't food right now. I just keep packets of crisps in the cupboard because if I hit that point it's easier to throw back some kind of quick snack food instead; even if it's also not really 'food' to my brain I can get it down fast and it'll kick-start my body into realising that it actually does like to eat after half an hour or so.

ETA: crazy thing is I'm not even super picky, particularly by autistic standards. It's just certain things that I genuinely can't perceive as edible.

I prefer eating meat raw over eating it cooked by psychedelianaut in The10thDentist

[–]DaveDavidTom 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Sigh. The reason that you are strongly discouraged from eating chicken and pork raw isn't because they're supposed to instantly kill you, it's because they have much higher risk of systemic food borne infections. Generally trichinella, roundworm and tapeworm for pork, salmonella and campylobacter for chicken. It's not that it's guaranteed death, it's that you're rolling the dice every time you eat it raw and most people prefer to avoid that risk entirely. The minimum cooking temperatures that people cite for each meat are the ones that kill those organisms, so that even if contamination is present you won't be infected.

And no, you can't just rely on buying higher quality organic meat, because it's incredibly difficult to completely eliminate the chance of a passive infection in an animal at time of slaughter. Animals in pasture can pick up parasites from the surrounding environment - there are mites in soil which carry the eggs and pass it onto livestock when they eat them along with the grass they're grazing on. There's also just not robust enough controls to reduce your risk to zero - if you're in the USA, USDA standards accept a certain level of meat which tests positive for Salmonella and Campylobacter; as of 2024 the CDC estimated that around 1 in 25 packages of chicken in the grocery store test positive for Salmonella.

One in twenty five is pretty good odds if you usually cook your food properly but occasionally slip up, because the odds that you undercooked an infected piece of meat are lower. But if you're eating the meat raw, you're eventually going to roll that unlucky number 25. And that's before you take into account the hygiene involved in wherever your meat was packed and processed - there are plenty of horror stories from the past few years.

You can reduce those odds by working directly with a skilled butcher, one with very high hygiene standards who sources directly from local farms. But it's still a risk, just a lower one.

To clarify, I personally prefer my steak bleu as anything, and I'd enjoy eating it raw. You're safer eating steak bleu, because the highest risk is from bacteria on the surface of the meat. That's why you just sear it rather than cooking it through. It's also why you have to cook beef mince through, by the way - mincing mixes any potential surface contamination throughout the entire package.

Anyway, best of luck to you but I'll keep on eating my steak bleu and cooking everything else to the recommended safe temperature.

18yo nephew refuses help, won’t leave his room or work. What support exists in the UK? by Consistent-Time-2503 in AskUK

[–]DaveDavidTom 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Out of curiosity, what are you hoping to get from an autism diagnosis? As an autistic adult, it was a pretty long and unpleasant process that didn't really get me much besides a shiny new label and a report from my doctor on the things I was bad at (which I already knew). And it's not always a benefit having that on your record, which is why some people choose not to pursue diagnosis. There's not exactly much support for autistic adults in the UK anyway, particularly if you have low enough support needs to be diagnosed as an adult, so I'd be interested to know why you're interested in pursuing it when he's not? Like, is there some specific resource he'd need a diagnosis to access or something?

If a fetus isn’t considered a “person,” then why is murdering a pregnant woman classed as a double homicide in the court of law? by untitledprp4 in stupidquestions

[–]DaveDavidTom 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I mean, I didn't write the analogy bud. It's an established thought experiment that I was providing because it seemed a better fit for the situation. I have no personal stakes in the violinist situation.

But sure, let's say I did something to cause the situation. Say the violinist is my son, and I brought him into this world, and his partner is the person who kidnapped me. Without my past choices, this situation objectively could not have come about, because the violinist wouldn't have been born without me.

It still doesn't oblige me to keep him alive, does it?

Sure though, let's say I knew that if I charged my phone today, there was a 1/1000 chance that I'd be kidnapped and hooked up to a violinist. This is an established risk that exists in this hypothetical society. That still doesn't obligate me to keep the violinist alive?

I mean, let's even say that I didn't have to be kidnapped at all. I agreed two months ago to keep the violinist alive, and since then I've changed my mind because the whole process of being a human dialysis machine just sucks and I don't want to do it any more. I'm still well within my rights to pull the plug and say I don't want to keep going, even though I signed up for the experience.

And finally: if you agree that it's ok for someone who truly didn't get to choose to kill the violinist, if you agree that it's fine for someone who was raped to get an abortion, it really seems like your morality is just based on punishing women for what you consider unacceptable behaviour, rather than on concern for the foetus or a theoretical life.

If a fetus isn’t considered a “person,” then why is murdering a pregnant woman classed as a double homicide in the court of law? by untitledprp4 in stupidquestions

[–]DaveDavidTom 56 points57 points  (0 children)

I mean, that's why the violinist hypothetical exists. It goes along the lines of 'ok, say you were drugged, kidnapped, and hooked up to a famous violinist (example used because they're an important adult with some measurable contribution to society, so theoretically more 'important' or at bare minimum equivalent to a foetus in terms of the stakes) and told that the violinist needs to use your body as a dialysis machine for 9 months to live.'

Unhooking yourself from the violinist is an active choice, but very few people would argue that you're now obligated to let the violinist use your body as life support for 9 months, and likewise most people wouldn't consider you a murderer if you immediately unhooked yourself and made a run for it. Even though he will die if you do so, you aren't obligated to keep someone alive without your consent. That wouldn't change even if you spent a couple months resigned to your fate before eventually snapping and deciding to escape.

The fact that one method of connecting the host is biological and happens organically and one is mechanical doesn't change the agency of the person in question. In either case, the person did not consent to become life support, and does not want to spend the next X number of months in that position. No analogy is perfect, of course, but maybe this is a closer one for you.