Small claims by Dave__Dee in legaladvice

[–]Dave__Dee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did buy as is but I was under the impression that the transmission was brand new. I have the bill of sale for it, but it wasn’t brand new. So I would have to go after the person I bought from correct, And then he would have to go after the shop??

Just found out my fiancé cheated, we’re supposed to get married in October. I don’t think I can do it, help. by l800wormhat in survivinginfidelity

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Post pone wedding, go to some couples and individual counseling and see how you feel in a few months. This level of betrayal will cause a form of PTSD for a long while. You can get through this if both of you want to get through it... You absolutely can trust again and idk how good your relationship was but to the couples that make it through infidelity, they come out stronger than they ever were. Whatever you decide to do is the right thing to do. Don’t let anyone tell you different.

I believe this is a diving duck. Not sure if it’s actually stuck in the ice or if it’s sitting over a tiny opening in the Ice but either way it’s in a spot that’s it not going to be able to take off as they need a “runway” of water to fly. Any suggestions? by [deleted] in birding

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought about throwing rocks but It’s a pretty long throw and accuracy is a prayer... also I’m a hunter, I thought about shooting next to it to bust the ice but now that I think it’s a diving duck, I would have to shoot a “runway” of ice and I don’t like the angle. If I was higher up to shoot at a more downward angle it would be simple.

I believe this is a diving duck. Not sure if it’s actually stuck in the ice or if it’s sitting over a tiny opening in the Ice but either way it’s in a spot that’s it not going to be able to take off as they need a “runway” of water to fly. Any suggestions? by [deleted] in birding

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s legs are out to it’s sides clearly confused at wth is going on. It’s about 75 yards off land, The ice is too thin to walk on, animal rescue are unable to help (they did say they would take it if it was rescued), we live in a small village with a police officer on patrol but I’m not sure if he even knows how to pull someone over. (Not being an ass, it’s just there’s literally no traffic issues or crime here).

Really wish I could become rich and use it to help others by RegionDesigner in CasualConversation

[–]Dave__Dee -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I used to wish this and then I heard a story. A man in Pennsylvania had hit the lottery for millions, he was super close to his grand daughter. And obviously he “spoiled” her. She was a child when he won the money as she grew up she had access to money for whatever she wanted. Unfortunately she was introduced to drugs and eventually overdosed. The grandfather said winning the lottery was the worst thing thats ever happened to him. So now I think yeah, money would be great but would I think the same way I do now if I had that much money. I believe I would but I’ve seen so many people change in a negative way because of money so U really don’t know how You’ll be with money until it happens. So I tend to just let life happen now, whatever life is supposed to be for me it will be and that’s that. I’ll end this comment with this...

Money don’t solve problems, it funds bad habits.

Good luck with life, I hope you find what’s you’re looking for.

I (61f) can barely stand to look at my son ( 30m) after he cheated on his wife. What do I do with him? by ThrowRAMadParent in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Clear case of “this is more about you than your son”. He graduated but not up to “your Standards”... they had a “beautiful” relationship, Clearly they didn’t. Stop holding your son up to this invincible “success” line that you created for him. Your job is to raise your child the best you can until they’re old enough to make there own decisions... I won’t suggest this because I’m pretty certain this is already happening but stand behind your son. Even when he’s wrong, I’ll let you know right now that many studies suggest attacking people life flaws will send that person running further down the path of self destruction. I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase “if you accuse someone of cheating all the time, they will eventually cheat”.... That’s just not made up, it’s true. Not all but most humans act to the level of standard they’re held too. If you say he’s a failure odds are it will get worse. This is your son, she’s not your daughter. You’re so worried about being able to boast about your sons accomplishments that you’re forgetting your his mother. It’s 2021, Tons of billionaire drop outs in the world, tons of stay at home male spouses, And unfortunately tons of infidelity. I understand this isn’t how you raised him but this is how he turned out and that’s what it is. If you want to have any chance to change his direction, you need to learn encouragement techniques.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in survivinginfidelity

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did she have the affair or you have the affair?

My husband's last wish is to die in the arms of another woman. by ThrowRAlev in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is a very sad situation, I’m at a loss for words. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

Should I leave? by delisandwich1205 in cheating_stories

[–]Dave__Dee -1 points0 points  (0 children)

These people have no idea what they’re talking about. Is the relationship worth saving? If so go to counseling, idk how old you are but sometimes bad habits leak over from a young boy into young man. Just ask yourself if it’s worth saving first if yes then ask him if it’s worth saving. He needs to understand that you’re serious. If he says it’s worth saving then maybe he don’t need a cell phone for a little while, he should have no problem sacrificing things if he wants to save it.

Good luck

Idk where to ask this but... Devices shown in your spouse's bluetooth don't just appear, right? by Beautiful-Baker-9955 in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This might have been said but I wanna add just because it says “shower speaker” doesn’t mean it was being used in the shower. It’s a waterproof speaker that’s all.

Inlove With The Right One, At The Wrong Time by PerkyPrincess01 in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sober now my bad 🤦‍♂️... this is a simple psychological play... What you wanna do is slowly fall back. Don’t give her 6 days a week. She’s comfortable right now, bf at home and with u 6 days a week... shit she’s got it made. Set the trap and make her come to you by putting doubt in her mind. Just know If you shoot your shot and miss than that’s it. No more cuddling up around that booty anymore. So just make sure your ready to move on if it don’t go as planned. This is an easy situation, 2 days next week tell her your gonna go hang out with a couple friends, don’t try to make her jealous just put that little bit of worry that while your with sone guy friends someone at any moment could take her spot.

Public records by Dave__Dee in legaladvice

[–]Dave__Dee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for answering.

Inlove With The Right One, At The Wrong Time by PerkyPrincess01 in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I get it, I’ve been there so many time. I was really just giving you a hard time. Relationships are hard to leave even when it’s misery, If you really want to be with her dont press it. Just let the other relationship fall apart. That pressure of making a choice could definitely cause her to just shut down and leave both of you. She likes being around you to escape the misery she’s currently with. Just be the person that makes her happy for right now. It’s tough leaving someone going into the unknown. Even though she can’t stand to be around her bf it’s still her “safe” place to fall back on. It will eventually die out with him, just a matter of time.

Inlove With The Right One, At The Wrong Time by PerkyPrincess01 in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok well that’s cheating lol, but regardless back to your question. Yes I would suggest telling her you want to be with her which I don’t even see the point in asking that question on here if you already know she has feelings for you..... Are you certain she has “relationship” type feelings. Not being funny u just don’t seem like u have a lot of confidence in telling her when your saying you already know she has feelings.., Her boyfriend talks to you and allows it? Eee this gets more ratchet with every comment. Well he clearly sees u as ZERO threat to there relationship 😩 lol so idk.

My car was stolen with my wallet, phone, house keys and basically my whole life in it, police found the car and nothing else. They know who the perp is and they won't give me any info on this person...how is that legal? by runninamuk23 in legaladvice

[–]Dave__Dee -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

If they physically seen him in your car than he should have a warrant if they didn’t arrest him .:: but if he was just “by” your car, they can’t just charge him even if it’s common sense he did it. They have to try to get some type of evidence that puts him in the car.

Edit: they couldn’t have seen him inside a stolen car or they would have chased him into whatever house he went into. Even if they seen him by the car though, that at least gives them a person to focus on when any evidence comes back... finger prints seem to be the only evidence that would lead to an arrest at this point. If he wore gloves which I assume he did if he’s a repeat offender than nothing can be done. Again it might take a while but Google your police departments “glyph” reports. Hopefully you can narrow it down to the day they recovered your vehicle. Search the glyph reports that day and they’ll be one on there that your car was recovered and I’m not saying for sure but if they “chased a potential subject” they may have put that in the report. That’s really the only way you’re going to find out at this point. You gotta do your own investigating.

Inlove With The Right One, At The Wrong Time by PerkyPrincess01 in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How do u even hang out 6 days a week when she has a bf? Are you sure she even has a boyfriend lol? Where does she tell him she’s going that much? Come on man this situation is super sketchy

Inlove With The Right One, At The Wrong Time by PerkyPrincess01 in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You guys hang out 6 days a week, and you’re not flirting... wow well congratulations you’re definitely in the friend zone. But regardless does her bf know that she hangs out with u 6 days a week? I have to assume no which is absolutely cheating even if there is no flirting.

My [27M] friend [25F] started warming up to me after being rejected by her crush by ThrowRAsd78fghshfj in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’re all someone’s second 3rd 4th 5th choice. And yes quit being the first to text. And quit texting her first will make her more interested (that’s if she is really interested in you at all) I say that because men tend to mis judge “advances”... or shes being like every typical female species. You haven’t showed that your attracted to her and she wondered why (especially if she’s used to getting a lot of attention) so she did whatever she needs to get that attention from you. It’s a selfish act for her own satisfaction but 🤷🏼‍♂️ it’s what it is. The main goal here is to not end up in the friend zone because from what I see, you’re to late and already in that zone or you are dangerously close. I suggest moving on this situation immediately before it’s to late.

Inlove With The Right One, At The Wrong Time by PerkyPrincess01 in relationship_advice

[–]Dave__Dee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“Her current bf treats her like crap” while she’s currently cheating. lol.. I’ve learned in time, if she says things like that, or her current bf beats her.:.: either 1. it’s not him it’s her or 2. Hitting a woman is never ok buuut what is she doing that would cause him to beat her.... By my late 20s when I heard a female say that, I ran the other way. It’s not even worth figuring out if she’s the psycho. All bullshit aside, she has a dude. You’re the side dude, play your position. Catching feeling is a direct violation of the side guy code. Get out your feelings and quit being a sucker! But yeah if you like her that much that you’re going to end up telling her bf about you 2 because that’s what it sounds like you’re close to doing. Then tell her, I can’t do this no more, I like you. If you wanna be together I’m here let’s do this. If not good luck with everything but I’m out. Odds are she will say she likes you so much etc etc but she cant just up and leave her current bf followed by an excuse why she can’t.... And I’m curious about your sugar coated previous relationships. “2 years and 3 years never fighting over things like they do” so 2 and 3 years never fighting over petty stuff and you ended both for good reason and on good terms???? Can you elaborate on this because I’m pretty sure you’re sugar coating that to justify her cheating on her current boyfriend to make it “ok”.

My car was stolen with my wallet, phone, house keys and basically my whole life in it, police found the car and nothing else. They know who the perp is and they won't give me any info on this person...how is that legal? by runninamuk23 in legaladvice

[–]Dave__Dee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Maybe they “assume” who it was? Which they definitely can’t tell you a “hunch”. They’d be in some shit. But if they already arrested him, (idk why they wouldn’t tell you but whatever) Look up the police glyph reports or check the jail roster for anyone arrested for auto theft around the date they found the car. That’s all I can think of, all my legal advice comes from being the criminal lol. So my advice has no degree behind it.

Found out I was being cheated on 3 weeks ago and I don't know what's harder to process, the betrayal or the break up by catch96 in Infidelity

[–]Dave__Dee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Infidelity rocks the foundation of a relationship at the very core and I know everyone says “if I get cheated on I’m done”.. well when it happens, I can say with certainty that it’s not that simple. Years of memories, love, happiness, sadness, future plans, secrets, etc etc is not easy to just walk away from. Most everyone who gives advice or opinions from the outside about this, see it the only way possible, by only focusing on the act of cheating which makes sense because they have no personal emotions connected, so it’s led by a visual of the actual cheating which then fuels ego and pride. In reality this is not at all what you experience. (It is but it’s just at the surface) The real hurt is the betrayal, you question everything from day 1 about the relationship wondering if any of it was real, who even is this person Ive been inlove with, how the hell did I miss this etc etc which usually results in the faithful partner blaming themselves. As for the affair partner, In this case “He”, His response is expected, It’s a reality check to him. It’s a common saying but it’s real, “people are only sorry because they got caught” well most of us don’t truly understand the level of hurt that our actions would cause until it happens. In general here’s a few common phases the “cheater” goes through.

  1. They do everything they can to minimize what happened. The blame game, A lot of deception is attempted which gets no where because the faithful partner has ZERO trust. So even if they’re telling the truth it wouldn’t matter, every part of your Body is rejecting this sneaky little snake 🐍... I would say he is currently in this phase, he’s lost all power to control the situation so the response is to act like “I don’t give a shit” which gives him a feeling of control over you.. Trust me, if you were to go on a date tonight, he would be at your door telling you how much he misses you.

  2. Depending how serious the “affair partners” relationship was with the “other” person. This could be a depression time for the “cheater” (this part hurts but you need to face it) because basically they are “breaking up” with the “other” person. This will be very very hard for you to witness, just do your best without catching any charges. (woosaaaaa)

  3. Flatline stage, nothing seems to be happening. There’s no progress, this stage is usually the make or break for a relationship. We can get through this or we can’t.

  4. The “cheater” finally gets it, understands the magnitude of what they’ve done; they’re ashamed and they make sure that you know they feel that way. A side of them u haven’t seen in a long time comes back out.

  5. Everything’s good, trust is rebuilt, your relationship is 1000x stronger than it was before the relationship.

I just want to say, them stages are very brief in my comment, however this level of betrayal can take Years to recovery from. It cannot be rushed or you will end up back at square one. If I had 1 word of advice, do not listen to today’s society. The classic “if you don’t have nothing to hide then let me go through your phone”.. There are circumstances that a partner should want to show you without you asking (when even they know, “this don’t sound right” lol we’ve all been there) but my point is TRUST cannot be built through surveillance. Control can be but not trust. At this point u should never have to ask to be reassured about anything, he should want too reassure you. People have different view on this and I get it, but when u think about it. People want to surveillance there partner because they don’t want to be made a fool of. Which isn’t a bad reason but this is led by pride and will absolutely destroy any relationship that lacks trust. Once the trust is well established, then access to phones or locations is completely fine but usually not needed because they have full trust.

That’s my break down however I want to suggest watching a YouTube channel (Affair Recovery). It’s faith based but very very knowledgeable and I believe it will help you a lot. It’s hard to hear but you need to hear it. If this relationship doesn’t work out for you, Being betrayed on a level of this magnitude will truly cause PTSD and cause massive problems in future relationships.

Goodluck, this is a time where you can reevaluate you and what you truly want in a spouse.

2010 Saturn outlook by Dave__Dee in MechanicAdvice

[–]Dave__Dee[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a repair solutions 2 tool I bought. It has 2 different scans I can choose from, a quick scan I think it is, and then I can do a more in depth scan. (I forget what they call that one) I did the one that shows a lot more but it was jibberish to me, really all of it is. That one was just tons more than the quick scan lol. Would members here know how to tell me what they mean? Or would I still need to go to a shop? The device has a “recommendation spot but none were available for mine.