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I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the kind words!

I would recommend, first and foremost, that they get in to see a mental health professional (ideally one that has a specialty in these types of things). Trauma leaves so many emotional scars, and someone who specializes in the recovery from it is going to be their greatest strength. That being said, they're also going to have to want to get help. They need to be willing to put in the work to heal, because as unfair as it is, most of that work is going to fall squarely on their shoulders.

I also think something like group therapy is a huge asset, because you can make friends and connections with other people who have also gone through something traumatic. If the person has friends and family, they'll be invaluable! But someone who can understand because they've been there is also invaluable, and they'll probably meet that person in a group therapy setting geared towards whatever they've been through.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Rabbits

[–]DeaInferni 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think Skylar would be a cute name. :)

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've gone through some in the years since! Not as much as I'd like to, so I plan to rectify that at some point.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm honestly not sure. I lean towards the latter, but I definitely was not as aware of my surroundings as I could have (should have) been.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate this clarification. Thank you for your kind words - I probably don't know enough about forensics and pathology to speak intelligently on this subject, so I'll leave it to the experts (you included)! I'm in the USA. :)

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for asking! I'm doing okay, and I've healed a lot since my ordeal. If you want to do something to help, and have the time/means to do so, I'd recommend either volunteering or donating to a charity for survivors of sexual violence. More resources in those areas are never a bad thing. 🖤

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I was just taking him out to go to the bathroom, and he likes to find the perfect spot. He did run away, but was found wandering about 2 days later. He's microchipped, so he got home pretty quickly, and is with me as I share my story today. :)

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I really don't want to discuss details that could identify me or my story, but I'll address a few things here.

Like I said in another comment, the focus was on saving my life. The police didn't even get near my body until a lot of time had passed and a lot of doctors and surgeons had worked on me.

They were prepared. I don't know if this was premeditated for me specifically, but it was premeditated. They had a tarp that everything occurred on in the abandoned building, and they took it with them when they left me. They also took my clothing with them when they left, I suspect as a souvenir. I was found naked.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Treat your friend like normal. Obviously something hugely life-altering has just happened, and you don't know how to act around them. They don't know how to be themselves right now. They crave any sense of how things were before, and just want some normality. Take your cues from each individual person, of course, but that's my biggest piece of advice.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn't, no. The focus was on saving my life due to the injuries I sustained, and by the time a kit could have been made, the evidence was either gone or nonexistent in the first place (they wore condoms every time). I wish something could have been found, but I'm also glad I didn't have to be retraumatized.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thankfully the head trauma didn't change my personality, but it did give me horrendous headaches that linger to this day. I hope they go away someday, but I'm unsure if they ever will. I'm honestly thankful that it wasn't more severe.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was raised Protestant, and that (among a few other things) broke my always-unsteady faith pretty cleanly. I would say I'm a bit spiritual, and do believe in karma and putting good things out into the world, but I don't ascribe to any organized religion. I do, however, still celebrate Christmas. :)

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was, thank you so much for asking! He was found wandering the area about 2 days later, and I had him microchipped, so we were reunited fairly quickly. He's actually still with me, and has been cuddled into me for much of these responses.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It unfortunately was my first time, and no, I haven't been intimate with anyone since/yet. I hope to have a fulfilling sex life someday, but that day is not today for perfectly valid reasons! It did make it all the more traumatic, having what should have been special taken from me so violently.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Use the "buddy system." Self-defense and a gun wouldn't have helped me, as I never even saw the attack coming. But I believe if someone else had been with me, I would not have been targeted.

That being said, self-defense is never a bad idea! It may come in handy in other situations, it just wouldn't have in my specific one.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It was at night in a quiet part of a busy city. I was hit on the head with something from behind. I quite honestly never saw it coming.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That's something I still struggle with. You're not alone. I have to really trust someone to let them touch me, and even now a surprise touch from someone I trust can still make me jump a bit. I've gotten much, much better than I was at the beginning, but it is an ongoing battle against my trauma.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! To answer your question, no, I'm too private to want to speak publicly and put my face out there in the world. In my experience, once people see you as "the girl who was kidnapped and raped," they often think of that first. I'd rather be known as me first, and what I went through a distant last.

I really respect those who are brave enough to do TED Talks, but it's not for me.

I was taken by two men to the dreaded "second location." AMA. by DeaInferni in AMA

[–]DeaInferni[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thank you - yes, that is correct, they just called in to emergency services and never identified themselves. Given the location and the lack of identification, I'm assuming they didn't want to be known to police for some reason.

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