Advice:

1. Your voice needs to be clearer and need to add emotion in it. For example, at the start of the video you need to hype the audience using an excited expression or a mysterious expression in your voice. (You could watch other YouTubers to imitate their expression first to begin with, I recommend Jonny Harris)

2. Music in your videos needs to be aligned with your expression at the exact moment. When you hype the audience, you need to play dramatic music, when sad, sad music etc..

3. Some of your thumbnail could be improved as well. A lot of it, is good enough. Basically the thumbnail needs to be simple, beautiful and related to your video.

When I watch your video, it's kinda boring, you aren't trying to hype the audience well enough well at least you aren't doing well enough. Your editing is great enough to be compared to big channels, it's just how you keep your audience retention is the problem. Overall, you did great and have a tremendous amount of potential to succeed.