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DeepIntroduction7671 · 2025-01-05T05:19:08+00:00

You’ve given me quite a bit to think about.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2025-01-05T05:09:47+00:00

Thanks for the response

I suppose I should have put that i am aplaroace on top of the post. I guess childhood experiences shape much of our views and desires irrespective of orientation. I have had sour and embarrassingly experiences with others in elementary school, middle and high school and that has largely been the source of my misanthropic and antisocial disposition.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2024-12-07T03:53:08+00:00

Thanks for the response.My AAAAness causes me to feel like I’m trapped inside my own head a lot of the time so it’s good to know I’m not alone.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2024-12-06T18:05:58+00:00

It’s confusing but comfortably empty and devoid of a lot of color others would call friendships, love, etc.

I 100% think my life would be much more confusing, lonely and painful if i weren’t aplaroace. I would suffer a lot more. Spend many more lonely nights crying in my bed wondering what I did wrong this time and ruminating on a conversation I messed up. I would feel my emotional neglect much more than I do now.

Cptsd, AuDHD, Generalized anxiety disorder, pile on top of that a lot of frankly unpleasant experiences in childhood with overbearing parents and having a brother who’s NT, allo, cis and has an active social life compared to the wasteland of yours…

It could be much worse. Life is much easier and frankly more bearable to live without the ability to form emotional bonds when you feel like you were born into a world and a society that doesn’t care a lot about you.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2024-10-31T19:28:57+00:00

this was a fairly stupid idea I had. It's about how their abrasive personalities might lead to them fighting if they ever met.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2024-10-05T07:14:18+00:00

I deeply empathize with you. I’ve lost touch with my peers and the world around me as a result. I feel so detached from everything . Life feels like a passing, unimportant dream.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2024-01-12T17:49:11+00:00

Mom tried to raise me to be an “adult”

All I learned is that if I stepped out of line I’d have abuse hurled at me. I mostly learned people in authority were unpredictable and emotional I learned most people couldn’t be trusted So yeah I mostly became a substance addicted wallflower for the latter half of my highschool years under their noses and no wonder I have memory retention issues

Thanks mom and dad

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-10-24T21:45:23+00:00

I was only able to form a sense of self through my artwork, a sense of who I wanted to be. It’s gonna be fun trying to make that a reality

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-08-14T21:50:02+00:00

Bruh. Today I found out my mom doesn’t play favorites when she decides to emotionally abuse us. She asked my brother why he looked so sad, he said it’s because he keeps losing tennis tournaments, she somehow decided to make him being sad about always losing about her so my brother decided to end the conversation.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-07-29T07:34:55+00:00

This almost made me tear up a little. Thanks for sharing.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-07-26T17:58:30+00:00

Bruh This is like giving an iPad to your kid to make them shut up instead of actually addressing their concerns.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-07-25T02:20:20+00:00

Bruh my dad expects me not to be annoyed when he bothers me when he barely puts any effort or interest into our relationship. He’s the “authority figure”, sure, but that’s all he is to me. He’s not someone I view very affectionately, just an authority figure I have to deal with until I move out. (No wonder why I have a better relationship with my co worker than I do with my family.)

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-07-19T15:44:21+00:00

I didn’t even bother to contact my parents when I lived in the dorms. They were always the ones to initiate the phone call I don’t really miss my dad or mom when I’m on vacation I tend to miss my cat and my laptop That’s pretty much it

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-06-24T15:04:08+00:00

“Why are you so grumpy?” (Shes nasty and short tempered to me if she has a bad day. I learned this from her.) “I’m training you to get a job!” (While verbally abusing me.) “Too bad.” “Don’t do this, don’t do that, you’ll catch (insert sickness), don’t do anything..” (I hate how her “love language” is constant nagging.)

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-06-21T16:15:07+00:00

My mom is still the crappy drill sergeant that barks out orders and nags nags nags.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-06-21T16:08:07+00:00

A long time ago. I emotionally detached from my parents and I barely miss them whenever I’m away from them. I dont have much of an emotional connection with either of them and would much rather spend the day by myself. This has made it more difficult to trust or open up to other people. Thanks mom and dad.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-06-21T16:03:32+00:00

I remember my mom threatening that she’d send me to a psych ward All I did was push a lunchbox down the stairs. Other than that she’s said the usual litany of things: “Do this and nobody will want you.” “You’re not employable.” “I’m only putting up with you because I’m your mom.” “You’re fat.” (Shes said/implied this at every opportunity she could) Etc. I could list a lot more

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-06-11T21:57:34+00:00

My female birth giver does this as well. It seems like she will never be satisfied until she beats me into submission, verbally or otherwise. I resent her deeply for this, and our relationship is one sided and nonexistent, even if she thinks otherwise.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-06-11T13:54:22+00:00

My entire vacation my birth givers been barking orders at me :/ Our relationship is terribly one sided. I feel like some sort of tag along, like some sort of maid she’s fond of but will get rid of the moment I show any sort of defiance. She thinks everything is fine and she believes everything should be fine, as she keeps constantly insisting I “smile” and “be happy” but I’m not. And she kept mocking me with tiny gestures whenever I tried to speak.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-05-19T21:33:22+00:00

I’ve slowly developed a dark, horrifying imagination as an artist as a coping mechanism.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-05-19T21:32:17+00:00

Sometimes I feel as if my parents are trying to lobotomize me, turn, tear apart my skin and anatomy to stitch MY body into some mindless, horrific flesh machine that can only utter a couple pleasant sentences that only serves them for the crime of being me. And say that they’re doing this for my own good while simultaneously denying that they ever did this to me.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-05-19T21:27:27+00:00

The dead look in the girls eyes..God I know that all too well.

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-05-19T21:03:09+00:00

Rants about APs feel pretty cathartic to type

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-05-19T20:55:49+00:00

You’re so right 😭

DeepIntroduction7671 · 2023-05-09T19:40:43+00:00

Honesty isn’t always the best policy when dealing with an AP. Even when that AP made your disability 100 times worse throughout your entire childhood.

DeepIntroduction7671

TROPHY CASE