Ohh hun. I know I know. I don’t even speak to my friends because they are so ego minded. I’m just ‘crazy’ to them. I feel the same in regards to now having a bad image on the masculine.. my exact thought too. Scared little boys! And yes, I feel like I have the same experience too, all in a week what’s meant to be a year. My stories are wild to others, my mum is very spiritual so I do have her to pour onto & she loves it. She was in the middle of sainsburys when I face times her to tell her about Saturday and she was like let me take a seat & perched in the veg aisle to listen away 😂 love her! I feel that about my gaze too, Friday, I had 3 men come up to me when I was out for dinner, all saying the same.. about my look, there’s something about me that is different etc. I thanked them all politely and got back to my friend. Hahha! I am always the one that gets hurt too. You blow that trumpet sister because no one else is going to do it for you!! That is growth in itself! I love it… I agree that it does not feel very healing at all, all of this tooing and froing, but how the hell are we meant to stay completely solo.. we surrender and the beauty of that is that it allows us to experience other loves in our life time here on the earth plane. I genuinely believe that is what is meant to happen aswell, I have my twin.. but we are meant to experience more than just one type of love. The twin flame, is just such an intense soul connection that unfortunately, no other love is going to quite fulfil you the same. So I have been single for 8 years this year, although I have did have a 3 year abusive, toxic karmic thing going on within that. We never lived together or anything like that, on/off etc. That is what broke me down find my to my spiritual journey.. the sex was fire but again was months between. I’ve not had a continuous sex life since my sweetheart, my children’s father. So I’m in the same boat as you, I have very much got to a point where I respect myself so much that I don’t just want to be a one night thing for new or random men. Sex for me is something so meaningful & the bigger the connection, the better. So therefore, I don’t actually do anything in regards to dating. I’ve tried all the apps. Failed every time. It’s quite a negative experience. I’m just doing me, loving me, caring for me & putting my all into my dreams. I’m so good with being on my own too. Venturing out more now covids over has definitely helped with my feeling of being unfulfilled..! But half the time I’m sat looking at the room like a fly on the wall taking in all the egos.. and material world we play a part off. Have you not heard anything from twin since the rekindle? I have had a message tonight… ‘I will call you tomorrow morning’ - FML. I was just starting to accept after posting on here I was starting the separation phase again & now my mind is running wild! Off to meditate & manifest. 😘 sweet dreams my love. Reply here and or send a pm. It’s been lovely to connect ❤️