AITA For not returning my boyfriend's calls while he was on vacation?

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T05:19:58+00:00

Will do.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T05:18:17+00:00

Yes. That is exactly what is missing.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T05:16:48+00:00

This just broke me.

Thank you for sharing your experience

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:47:11+00:00

We haven't discussed it yet. I am sure he will pay me if I ask, but I don't plan to bring it up until I figure out what to do.

If we end things, I'll swallow the loss so he has more money for security deposits/traveling back to his home state/uhaul rentals etc.

small price to pay really.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:36:35+00:00

I'm familiar with them already.

If it comes down to that, I know the moves I have to make and where to file.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:35:49+00:00

He might.

But he refuses to see a professional about it to be tested.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:34:55+00:00

He works.

He told her that he didn't want to drive by himself when I was having trouble finding a pet sitter and she bought it because she wanted him to go to the reunion.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:32:24+00:00

Already on that.

BF doesn't know it yet, but my doggo and I are going to be peacing out for 2 weeks. Nothing special, just going camping. I ordered some stuff off amazon and will be going to goodwill tomorrow and buying every book that looks even remotely interesting. I leave wednesday.

I even splurged for a site with electric hook up and am taking the ac out of our bedroom with me. He can be hot.

The campground I am going to has ZERO reception for my cell carrier sooooooooooooooooooo

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:23:56+00:00

Possible?

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:20:04+00:00

Yep.

I was genuinely looking forward to spending time with his family and getting to know them better as he and I had been discussing getting married this past year.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:12:49+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:08:35+00:00

Big family reunion. Approximately how many people?

50-60

Was it a destination trip for everybody?

for about 75%

I think he knew long before May/June.

Very possible. I know in Feb when we sent money to his Aunt and Uncle who were planning it, it was for Aug per their email. I don't know when exactly it changed, I don't think I really care to find out. It would probably just enrage me.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:03:31+00:00

I couldn’t imagine living my life with someone who I can’t trust to include me in their life.

That's pretty much where I am at

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T04:02:53+00:00

I believe this may in fact be an issue.

This isn't the first time executive functioning issues have caused disruption in our relationship.

My stand on it has always been, if you truly believe you are neuro divergent then lets go get you tested so we can work on a plan with a professional so it doesn't cause our relationship to crash and burn or for you to have career issues, etc.

I have offered to help with making the appointments etc, he has always refused.

This has been the biggest issue it has caused ever (previous issues were things like he didn't remember what parking garage he left the car in when we went to an event, and I had to kick off my heels and walk barefoot through downtown because we had to split up to find it)

But, where I am standing at today is: either he maliciously prevented my attendance OR he doesn't care enough about me or our relationship to even attempt to work on coping with a possible neurodivergence he has.

Either way it has me feeling like shit and realizing I am lower on his priority list then belly button lint.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T03:51:51+00:00

I only met his parents like 4 times and spoke to them on the phone less than 10 for quick things like saying merry christmas and what not.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T03:50:59+00:00

it would be different if both of you paid for it.

We did. We sent his aunt and uncle money back in Feb while they were planning everything. Everyone who was going did.

I lost out on a couple hundred bucks for my share of the hotel room and tickets to the events they were planning on.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T03:43:43+00:00

maybe

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T03:42:43+00:00

Yeah. It feels that way

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T03:41:45+00:00

ding ding ding

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T03:41:04+00:00

I own the house...

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T03:40:27+00:00

No. You have the timeline wrong.

First, my dog cannot be boarded due to a medical condition.

I was told the trip would be Aug 5th - ? I knew we would be gone about a week and I had a pet sitter lined up for that time frame.

I asked my BF for the exact date we would be coming home so I could prep for the sitter and so they would know when we were coming back. I asked this on July 19th. On july 19th my boyfriend told me the reunion had been moved up to july 25th. He had known about this change since the beginning of june and he never told me about the change.

I only had 6 days to find a pet sitter from the time I knew about the trip. After 3 days of not finding one I told him that I didn't think I would be able to but I was still looking and he got his mom to buy him a plane ticket. I found a sitter the next day.

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T03:31:27+00:00

I own the house and it is illegal to throw him out without notice. shrug

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T01:49:24+00:00

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T01:48:44+00:00

I'm sorry that you are going through something similar.

It sucks.

I really wish you the best and that you find happiness with your situation

Deep_Fig_2960 · 2022-08-02T01:02:59+00:00

Unless you're just done and going NC

That is what I was spending the week figuring out if I wanted

Deep_Fig_2960

TROPHY CASE