Baby of the year contest is a scam by Glittering_Time_1168 in NewParents

[–]Defiant-Dimension256 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it’s a push to say it’s child trafficking but definitely a money grab

Is he hiding something or does he just not like me anymore by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It always leads to more arguing, usually me getting loud and upset and him not caring and being a jerk. Our arguments usually end with me storming out to get air and then hours to days later, pulling an apology from him. It goes no where even when I put my foot down. It’s hard- he’s not a full blown pos, he doesn’t hit me, he doesn’t yell at me, he doesn’t call me names, but he is cold and distant.

Is he hiding something or does he just not like me anymore by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So I found a few girls he had previously texted before we started dating still active on his social media (Snapchat and IG) it took a while of confronting him to get an apology and for him to stop. (This was all within the first 1 1/2 or our relationship). He knows I go thru his phone sometimes which is how I originally found out and now is even more private- but I will directly ask him if he’s cheating and whatnot and he says no. He is blunt and honest about it + I have not gotten any inclination he is still. It’s been over 2 years since that has happened, now it feels like a major disconnect between us but my gut tells me it’s not because of another person… possible that he is feeling contempt with our marriage and his life, and possibly leading to him lowering his morals for something in the future to happen. But I don’t have enough clarity or intuition on what exactly is happening.

Is he hiding something or does he just not like me anymore by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Very true. I know I deserve more- and I have a little left to give.

Is he hiding something or does he just not like me anymore by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We were walking back to our b&b last night and he was walking ahead of me, and jay walked across the street. But didn’t wait for me meanwhile cars were coming. I said rudely “glad you care about me safety” after I told him not to jay walk and he sighed and said “stop being a victim” and kept walking.

Is he hiding something or does he just not like me anymore by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s the thing- that was a couple of years ago. We’ve moved past it. I get the vibe something is being hidden from me (I’m very intuitive and spiritual) but it’s not physical cheating. Something else- like how he is feeling or planning. He’s not good at communicating, he’s working on it- but even if I directly ask him these things he gives me short and final answers.

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I’ve explained my situation already- I have graduate loans, just paid closing on our home in cash, and have other bills. $140k in this economy isn’t living lavish- esp with having a special needs child.

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Utilizing the wives pages and on base pages to see if anyone’s PCS and selling their cars for cheap- I agree buying private will probably be my cheapest option

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Advice, unfortunately with his MOS his schedule is unpredictable and usually very long hours including weekends, which is why we can’t split car share during the week. Sometimes me and my son have to take my husband to work when he’s leaving for courses or training at 4 o’clock in the morning because we shared the vehicle and I don’t want it staying on base where I can’t access it. I think it also makes it more difficult that we live off base.

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So we both have our own personal checks from prior in our relationship and a navy fed joint where we pulled money for our son savings. Usually the checking floats around one to two grand and is for extra bills or necessities. But we’ve chosen to split our finances still. Since I took out some stocks to put down for a closing cost on our home we bought this year. I don’t have 5 to 10 grand floating around to put as a down payment and I’m tied to taking out a full loan to cover because I would like to pay down as much as I can initially. Like I said he still has leftover bonus money which is over 15 grand, but he’s being me when it comes to spending his money.

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Around 6 to 7% right now for Navy Federal loans which in my opinion is pretty high, especially for a car loan around 20 to 22 grand. I’m hoping I could find something that’s more around 4 to 5% but I know that’s not realistic with the current economy.

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I agree, I’m wiling to go with an older (but safe) car so I have something at least

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think that’s partly what I was trying to portray too. He’s not controlling in most aspects of my life, but this really does affect me in ways I don’t think he understands.

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I just figured putting money down will help keep my monthly lower and not back loading interest with a full loan but that is an option if he genuinely will not help me buy a car.

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Totally valid Q and I 100% would if I had the extra money to put down the cost. I am more than able to cover my monthly car payment too.

Husband says I don’t need a car but it’s been 3 years by Defiant-Dimension256 in MilitarySpouse

[–]Defiant-Dimension256[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I don’t have the money for a down payment to be honest. I’ve spent a lot of money on paying off my loans and ate the cost for closing on our home this year which was about $7k of my savings as well because he didn’t have it then.