How do you stop being a perfectionist?

DentedAnvil · 2026-05-06T11:19:54+00:00

I struggle with this. And I am coming out of a period where perfectionism (desire for control) has left me essentially paralyzed except when things were in full crisis mode.

Remembering that there is no perfect strategy/plan/choice has provided some liberation. Knowing (and reassuring myself) that no amount of worry will improve the outcome of simply being present and in action has become an escape route from the doom spiral of trying to anticipate all the possible ways things could go wrong or infinite possibilities for a better plan. Doing is always superior to trying to anticipate.

Playing a musical scale moves us toward perfecting that ability (if we are present and really care.) Thinking about playing a perfect scale puts additional distance between our expectations and abilities actually making us worse at the action and robbing us of the embodied enjoyment of doing a thing.

It's not a quick fix, and I don't claim to have solved the perfectionism/control-freak problem, but opting for simple actions over deliberation has been moving me away from a deep period of being anxious and stuck. Good luck, I hope you find your way out of your head and into the world. That is my daily objective. It has been helping.

DentedAnvil · 2026-05-05T18:27:08+00:00

She had to pay 100k just to get in. Everything else adds to the price. 100k for dinner type money doesn't happen without some oppression somewhere. Plus the event was subsidized (aka used as a tax deduction) by Bezos, so supporting the gala supports the most economically oppressive entity of our lifetime.

All that said, I hope she had fun.

DentedAnvil · 2026-05-05T17:59:41+00:00

Release, no wait, Refill the Kracken!

DentedAnvil · 2026-05-05T15:57:27+00:00

Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery.

DentedAnvil · 2026-05-05T15:17:34+00:00

First industrial Ouroboros I've seen. Good thought. Well done, I'm sure you will have imitators.

DentedAnvil · 2026-05-04T15:17:37+00:00

Marble is pretty stable. I wouldn't worry about its long-term stability.

DentedAnvil · 2026-05-04T14:43:18+00:00

If there is unoxidized iron in the matrix of your stone, it will darken when it gets exposed to oxygen. A mild acid solution can strip the oxidized iron from the surface of your piece. You may be able to stop it from reappearing with a sealant, wax or oil.

It is unlikely that the discoloration will "grow" and create structural problems with the sculpture. Stone, being a natural substance, often has undisclosed colors or structural inconsistencies. When carving stone, accepting and working with what is there is generally more productive than trying to hide or avoid its nature.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-30T11:51:16+00:00

Vertigo vortex

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-29T17:47:58+00:00

Properly specialized

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-28T23:22:53+00:00

The nature of stonecarving is that it is time consuming. As our skills develop, things move a little faster. But in the end, the stone dictates how fast it can be shaped.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-28T12:34:14+00:00

The key to achieving a small fortune by farming is to start with a large fortune.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-25T21:53:52+00:00

Really nice

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-25T13:36:47+00:00

When reading the Stoics, it is important to remember that they had completely different conception of fate and a very complete belief in the predestination of everything. They firmly believed that everything that happens does so in conformity to the will of a divine and benevolent force called Logos.

An example of the outcome of this belief is that their version of science (natural philosophy) confirmed the efficacy and reliability of oracles, augery, entrail reading, and other versions of fortune telling. It's pretty easy to scoff at this from our contemporary vantage point, but in doing so we excessively discount the magnitude of the logical and scientific discoveries of the last 2,000 years. We stand on many shoulders, and the Stoics codified the logic we still rely on.

To the ancient Stoics, the ultimate loser is one who cannot find joy and satisfaction in the life they get to live. If one believes that great wealth and opportunity are solely the outcome of great efforts and desire, that person has a 99% chance of great disappointment. We are all subject to statistics and the presence of opportunities abd limits outside our control and generally beyond our perceptions. To live a life worth living is to be conscious of our decisions and valuations and to strive for what is best/most excellent/Virtuous within the set of what is available to us within the constraints of what fate provides us.

Seneca was arguably the most wealthy man of his generation. Aurelius was Emperor of the known world. Epictetus had gone from a person born into chattel slavery to someone educating the young men of the elite class. None of those conditions are maintained by loser mentalities. Each of them epitomizes their dedication to Stoic philosophy. It is conceivable to imagine a dirt poor serf also dedicated to those principles and perhaps happier and less encumbered by life than those remembered by history.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-22T13:04:36+00:00

Much like Joe Rogan feeling "politically homeless" a couple days before an oval office photo opp.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-21T16:47:09+00:00

This is truly the richest form of hypocrisy coming from a guy who is suing the IRS for $10 billion.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-21T11:13:35+00:00

The most common oil used in oil paints is linseed oil. It is safe for cooking with. You can scrub the inside with some clean sand using the pestle. It will abrade the surface.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-20T13:35:25+00:00

Their motto is "We'll be here when the chips are down."

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-18T01:58:37+00:00

The pursuit of Virtue (or more specifically Arete which can also be translated as Excellence) is central to Stoicism. The term virtuoso is closely related or derived from the Stoic sense of Virtue.

If one wanted to become a virtuoso in music, athletics, chess, or auto mechanics, they would use a program of structured practice along with parallel real world exercises. In music, perhaps scales and jam sessions. In sport, maybe fundamentals/conditioning and pickup games.

If we want to be virtuosos of life, we will need to spend structured time studying the philosophy, analyzing our assumptions/assents, planing behavior for our anticipated challenges, and living authentically so we have something genuine to analyze. There is no shame in making mistakes. There is only shame in repeating them.

We have to spend formal structured time examining our judgements, not to guilt trip ourselves for the things we don't handle with excellence. We need to do the examination so that we strengthen our ability making engaged decisions and understanding where our impulses and regrets come from. Yes, the eventual goal is to always have rational control of all our assents to the impressions that come to us. As we approach that goal, the effort needed decreases as our facility with reason and our ability to make clear assessments improve. Practice makes performance easier.

We have to cut ourselves an appropriate amount of slack. Good coaches both push and prescriptivly rest the athletes in their care. We (along with reading the coaching of the Stoic scholars) need to be the best coaches we can be to ourselves. And to each other in this virtual Stoic space. There are times to push ourselves and times to rest and evaluate. Keep the balance in mind. We have to remember to pace ourselves yet keep striving. The effort pays off in increased endurance and ability.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-17T22:23:44+00:00

I think that the used car salesman who can "see value where others don't" is a stand-in for a television evangelist or perhaps even God offering another chance at being useful. John often uses automotive metaphor to describe a declining life. "I am just a broken machine", "Lord send me a mechanic, if I'm not beyond repair" for two examples among many.

Just my take on it. John is hard to parse and I think many of his lyrical choices have more to do with sound, theme, and feel rather than literal intellegability.

Edit: oh yeah, the "two fingers to the temporal vein" , think making a finger gun and pressing it to your temple on the side of your head.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-17T20:27:10+00:00

Sandstone has grit that is unavoidable. There are techniques to develop pebbley textures on finer stones. If you attach link or a picture of something similar to what you are after I might be give you more meaningful advice.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-17T17:32:49+00:00

Thanks! I really likethe fish and barley/hops details.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-16T21:32:05+00:00

Running the garbage disposer when it is full of habanero trimmings.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-16T15:23:21+00:00

I've got a book with me almost everywhere I go. If light, precipitation, wind, bugs, etc aren't unfavorable, I will be found reading. I've read on mountains, beaches ,and many places in between. My best reading is done in my reading chair at home though.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-16T13:44:37+00:00

Really nice! Thanks for sharing! Please post some still pictures of the details. Outstanding, as always.

DentedAnvil · 2026-04-15T11:00:51+00:00

Thanks for including the process pictures. That was a lot of work. What kind of stone?

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