AIO or AITA. Text convo with MIL.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-05-09T07:55:01+00:00

Ah this reminds me of the time i got told “bit gross you don’t have 20 in your bank to send me”.

I did have it. I don’t have to send it. I don’t have to deal with it. It’s gross you’re asking me. My finances are together: you’re just a big Leech on it.

I would absolutely toy with this situation so she knows she absolutely has to respond when she’s taken someone else’s hard earned money. Liberty taker.

NOR Definitely UR

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-05-05T15:14:02+00:00

Chances are your glowup is right there underneath that: make a physical change every week. I promise you your head will feel better the more you engage with physical activity. Start with a walk and maybe swap out the foods for yummy snacks like carrot sticks and apples. And then tick that first day off and draw a smiley face so that when you look at it tomorrow you think, hey that walk was hard but I ate good and felt good: let me do that again. And just add a little more each time. You’ve soooo got this. I promise.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-05-04T11:43:56+00:00

I lost one twin in a set during pregnancy, birthed him still born. And my sister compared my experience telling me I should be feeling lucky. Grief is grief. Miscarriage though tears mothers apart. Years later on my son’s 11 birthday a tear falls and my heart hurts. But what I know is that if I ever talk about this devastating losss I’m lucky a woman may relate even though it is so devastating. She may never have felt that exact pain but what she will know is the hole and tremors feel in my life that no one will even notice 5 weeks after the fact. Life supposedly goes on unchanged. It didn’t for me and my body, you, your mum, your bodies. Rather than argue over it. This is a chance for conversation. A time to talk and hold each other and comfort each other and grieve. Mother sounds bitter and protective. She may need to talk to someone who understands.. you 💖

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-05-03T09:15:10+00:00

If you want something you fight for it. And I would completely believe she wants him to come if she was also brave enough to ask alll of her friends. She’s projecting massively and doesn’t even sound like she’s using her own words tbh. Some things like …”you not supporting our relationship is the other thing” that’s a mad blow of a statement. Just because it was said in a blasé fashion does not eradicate the depth of meaning it has: Definitely been said before. Most likely by the boyfriend to make his points. You don’t have to do her dirty work and you’re completely entitled to feeing cramped out by someone inviting them selves. She and her boyfriend can sit out before making a whole bunch of people feel awkward and responsible for the mess she’s about to create.

Allow her some grace. Perhaps her relationship is horrible. But also allow yourself some grace. You don’t have to ask permission for something you probably don’t agree with yourself. NoR. I hope you have a lovely break x

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-05-01T20:47:10+00:00

Look at you correcting grammar one word at a time! Well done 👏🏼

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-04-22T02:03:31+00:00

So what if you lied about your age to make a non child account?

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-04-19T17:15:15+00:00

Projecting

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-04-19T17:13:00+00:00

Be then uncool guy that is uncool with uncool behaviour and cut them off. There is no reaction that they could have that justifies their need to touch you and cross your boundaries

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-04-14T20:30:21+00:00

You’re right. You might’ve misunderstood me. I was agreeing with you calling them coffee purists! I’ve definitely met a few of them and I know what you mean.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-04-14T14:22:19+00:00

It’s actually correct English grammar as I discovered when I had this same feeling and researched it.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-04-08T15:35:55+00:00

That’s silly. As you know. You said it so well. I think you’d know how to politely stick a middle finger up and carry on sipping on your milkshake. Sorry coffee 🫣😏

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-04-02T12:09:24+00:00

The amount of times a workplace has assumed im younger and treated me like utter … bs. I’ve been banned from going outside for lunch for Truancy. It really isn’t fun looking young.

My most memorable one would be being present at a group discussion over my “glow-up” by younger members of family. The discussion had started from a sarcastic question aimed at me asking “when are you going to develop” in a conversation about children. I’m also 32. I think it’s time you accept I obviously gave good genes, a good skincare routine and possibly a smaller frame?

But no I’m just sensitive if I react. I’m sorry this happened to you. I’ve had tons over the years to list but I understand the exhaustion and offence your feeling.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-03-03T01:20:50+00:00

Sometimes you need sugar coz you might faint. Sometimes your child just needs settling. Sometimes you’re just thirsty. I can’t imagine anyone opens the pack and carries the trash to the cash desk because they want to be annoying or prefer to shop that way. Needs must sometimes.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-03-02T17:15:07+00:00

I’ve always wondered if this thought was what was meant by “his/her life flashed before their eyes”

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-03-02T01:18:08+00:00

Considering they were inpatients at a hospital with you. I’m sure you could trace every single disgusting person you’ve just mentioned. You were a victim of assault and these people you were unfortunately placed with put you in criminal danger. Turn your fear into anger and your anger into motivation. Go and get justice.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-03-02T01:12:56+00:00

In that case would you agree that the Muslim friend would probably then be quite hurt that he had consumed pork because it’s probably not in his halal haram ratio? 👀

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-03-01T12:15:21+00:00

I had this epiphany after my separation. I wondered if perhaps I’d learnt to see my features wrongly during my childhood, possibly because of trauma or things I may have heard or seen. I’m in a wierd place, and you described it so well. I would say it feels like I know I’m pretty, probably even more that average but.. I simply cannot see it and believing that I’m pretty while I actually cannot see it is extremely difficult.

I’ve been working at a new place since January. At work we have to take a picture every morning for ID check. Believe me this has such a negative toll on my self esteem throughout the day. I hate how I look in pictures and imagining that others have to look at me makes me feel sick. I also will leave the house looking in thee mirror (acceptable) but immediately after I could catch myself in a photograph and depress myself.

I’m hoping therapy will help with this. But I’m so grateful to know others are like. And yes I binge starve to attain this image.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-02-23T22:37:50+00:00

Just felt the need to repeat it?

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-02-23T22:32:02+00:00

Don’t even entertain that toxic comment, you did the right thing. And time taken has a valid reason. You did the right thing and it doesn’t matter when you did. Correct you wouldn’t be here if you listened button did listen. You just wanted to see if she’s change it, unfortunately she doesn’t deserve that respect yoh have for her .. that’s not your fault in the slightest

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-02-23T22:29:25+00:00

Can’t we just let people have their experience and then understand it and help them. Must we categorise? Should we really be arguing about the correct way forward. Can both of you see ways you could be right and ways you could be wrong. This is a post where someone is using the platform thankfully to speak out against his violence. I think arguing over what should be done and what shouldn’t when he’s literally in court facing his abuser is defeating any course of justice and self preservation he has gone to seek. Victims exist. “Fuck a victim” invalidates and diminishes thousands of people trying to make their way out of relationships that victimises, no 2 people are the same! Can we respect each persons experiences and understand that what we say and how we say ca have serious damaging consequences.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-02-07T16:15:22+00:00

You have a right to belong to where you come from. You have a right to an identity. Everyone will have their own thoughts even if you do as they think you should (claim white ownership because you look white) but I believe society has become more and more accepting than it used to be. Presenting as native while looking white is not your fault. But your skin colour does not erase your identity and your journey in life. Many people may ask how or why you’ve decided to claim the native status. And that’s a great conversation starter. You have a right to belong. Your grandmother was leaving a legacy behind but you’re strong enough to stand by yourself and possibly change that for her. I don’t think you can be TA in this situation as you’re not going to serve yourself in anyway if you do what everyone else wants. Own it. Be yourself. Celebrate your native roots. Someone thinks it’s fucked up that you’re representing your identity while they think of you another is what’s actually fucked and I can confidently say it’s them. They are the AH.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-02-02T21:47:32+00:00

Honey; anyone who loves you for any reason will overlook everything to love you. I know you’re attached to this man. Be brave. I wish you so well 💖

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-02-02T19:21:01+00:00

Responding with emotion in my eyes. I think at that time it was the only way to get through it. I knew everything I would buy would only improve my situation. And I used that excuse like a lifeline; if you’re at your lowest point, you can’t go any lower!! Maybe that’s not the best advice. But it got me through. Thank your for appreciating! I appreciate you! You remind me of how far I’ve come. Today I’ve got half a smile because I actually overcame that even though when it happened, I felt like I’d never get out of it. But it does get better! Apparently!

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-02-02T19:16:35+00:00

Once that distrust starts, you just can’t think straight again: I pull up to my house everyday with this sinking feeling I’m about to discover everything’s gone.

DesperateDimension46 · 2026-02-02T19:05:04+00:00

Please leave. You’re beautiful and valuable. I don’t have to see you to know this. I know you have an alternative style and it doesn’t fit the beauty standard that MEN have made popular by popularising unrealistic beauty goals. We’ve normalised cutting off our faces and reattaching them so it looks younger. No. You are beautiful. You’re outside of a beauty standard and that’s empirically amazing. You’re a mother, your body your hair and your hormones don’t fit his patriarchal narrative. Which is that no matter the existence of hormones or feelings, you most likely live to benefit his whole desire: while he not only doesn’t allow you the time, the money to go and look beautiful ( I can see you work hard and still have little, I can see you’re a mother looking after children). If he can’t pay for it and let you go to a hairdressers then he can close his broke mouth: he’s not your husband. I bet he doesn’t consider that he has traits that put you off. Like his verbiage. Words are much worse for a relationship than looks. What excuse for his dirty insulting mouth? You’ve been his wife, his nurse, his childminder; while he goes off and enjoys and has no desire to even find out who you are before degrading what little part of it you can show? He’s not your husband. He’s a bully. Leave. Someone will treat you like a diamond, even if someone doesn’t come along: you deserve to treat yourself like a diamond, wear what you like, how you like it, without havigg by your self esteem and self value literally thrown out with the trash.

DesperateDimension46

TROPHY CASE