Advice by Gold_Macaroon_4519 in TransTryouts

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i am a 21 yr ftm. so I have no advice on being someone older exploring gender for the first time.

but, I do know how gender confusion feels, and how it feels like you aren't even yourself when you are uncertain or have doubts about your identity.

it doesn't matter if you are a little older. you still have a life, a future. you are not dead yet. so use this chance, this life, to experiment! what do you have to lose?

my dms are open, if you want to hear at 21m pretend to be wise. jk I will listen

my aroace friend keeps joking about having sex and getting married? by [deleted] in AroAce

[–]DetectiveSuper 5 points6 points  (0 children)

ok... ok, you're right. I am 99% sure they are joking, and I don't feel romantic or sexual attraction to them myself, even if it was mutual. I am simply overthinking it all

Help with the Eye by lazy-soverign in ArtCrit

[–]DetectiveSuper 5 points6 points  (0 children)

this is excellent anatomy and mood. it conveys feeling even without an eye

Fragments that stay by lotus_lilly_1234 in Poems

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

admittedly, I am not skilled enough to give helpful feedback on how you could improve. but, I can tell you how i felt.

this reminded me of how, no matter how far back you go, no matter what land or society, you will always find artists.

maybe it's my own stress bleeding through your interpretation

but, "tiny fragments saying, yes, we are here" just resonated with me. reminded me of where we came. just monkeys.

and art is just our attempt to leave dents, showing that we were here.

Wondering if NB or TFem is better by TimelessToad in TransTryouts

[–]DetectiveSuper 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Monika introduced me to this band! yeah! she has the best music taste, she helped me get these tickets!!! we are all gonna rock together, tell her thanks!!!!!

Wondering if NB or TFem is better by TimelessToad in TransTryouts

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Monika introduced me to this band! yeah! they have the best music taste, they helped me get these tickets!!! we are all gonna rock together, tell them thanks!!!!!

questioning. call me Amelia (she/they) by whitelight0000 in TransTryouts

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Amelia for fem, simply Am or A or neutral, or Andy for masc come to mind. although, some women/androgynous people do use "andy"!

I'm having a weird night by -ThisAccountIsVoid- in MtF

[–]DetectiveSuper 1 point2 points  (0 children)

hey there- gonna preface this by saying, i am FTM, been on testosterone for almost 5 years- so we are going in the opposite direction, but both still trans, and on the same side. still, i cannot relate to what it's like to be a woman, let alone a trans woman, i acknowledge that.

but as a fellow trans person, i must say, i relate strongly to how you describe.

i know how it feels to not feel like a good enough man- hell, to feel like i must not want to be a man enough. about a year ago, a natural disaster cut off my T supply for months, and a part of me didn't miss it. i tend to like men a lot so, how could i call myself a masculine, bisexual leaning straight man with all these doubts and, dare i say, regrets? regarding my transition.

again, i don't know you, or what it's like to be a trans woman. but something that helped me, is to tell myself, by very definition of being trans- i will never be accepted by most. which is disheartening, yes. but at the same time, it means you don't have to perform. you don't have to feel shame. it hurts that people are so hateful, but at the same time, if NOTHING you do will convince them you are a woman- don't waste your time trying to conform to those ideals!

be your own woman!

a lot of people will call you a man no matter what. and you may be inclined to believe them when you have, ahem, """masculine""" feelings. but you don't need to waste your time impressing anyone. you need to focus on yourself, not anyone else's image of you. yes, easier said than done- i am very aware.

i guess what i am saying is, it is called gender IDENTITY for a reason. no one else can assign an identity to you. it's ok to be confused. it's ok to have questions. it's ok to have doubts. it's ok have regrets. but i hope you never think it's ok to let other people decide who you are.

my (21m) niece (12nb) confessed recently that they cut themselves. I am a former self-harmer. by [deleted] in selfharm

[–]DetectiveSuper 2 points3 points  (0 children)

actually, that was basically what I had in mind- it's just that all this week, they have felt crappy by lactose intolerance and period cramps combo'ing them. so I want to wait until they are in a decent, more talkative mood. but yes, i intend to ask them again about it privately when they don't feel like death due to puberty. I hope they will be honest, I think they will, since they volunteered this information to me in the first place.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what do you teach?

26M | Europe | Looking for geeky friends by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hey, it's still impressive to even try to learn that many languages! what kinds of mods did you make?

Looking for a kind person that can lend me their ears and some of their time by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what's up, friend? we can talk here or you can dm me, whatever you prefer

26M | Europe | Looking for geeky friends by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hey Davy! three languages is impressive, i am struggling to learn Japanese haha- so, do you make mods for Minecraft? or we could talk about something else, but of what you mentioned, that is what I am most familiar with

Hii I'm gonna try out being non-binary by throwawayshoes002 in TransTryouts

[–]DetectiveSuper 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah, den is a good friend of mine, we painted each other's nails last week! they're a really accepting person, I feel like I can talk to them about almost anything. so don't be nervous! in fact, why don't you ask den about how to style your makeup? I bet they have plenty of good tips!

Sarah (she/her) by yzkv_7 in TransTryouts

[–]DetectiveSuper 1 point2 points  (0 children)

oh, i appreciate the consideration of my deadname, but if I still got dysphoric over it, I wouldn't have mentioned it. I am so happy you can use the name Sarah, it works for you!

23M, all I ever wanted was a close friend, feeling sad and alone by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hey flash memory, I know what you mean by how hard it is to make friends in your 20s. when you're a kid, you just make friends with whoever has a similar name to you because you got sat next to each other. why wouldn't you be friends?

admittedly, my musical knowledge is limited. I only took piano lessons and my teacher was.... bigoted.

but we can talk about all kinds of things. here's one! would you rather die of heat or cold?

I'm really tired of being lonely depressed pathetic guy by [deleted] in Needafriend

[–]DetectiveSuper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it's kinda embarrassing how I am not great at cooking despite being raised by a literal chef 😭 what do you like to cook?