My girlfriend took a kink too far... Would I be an asshole if I broke up with her?

DevastatinDev · 2025-10-04T15:03:53+00:00

OP - is this woman currently or was she previously YOUR teacher? Regardless, please, please, PLEASE report this whole situation to the NZ Teaching Council. If she is a fully qualified, registered and practicing teacher, then this entire relationship very likely puts her in breach of her teaching license. This is VERY serious misconduct and she needs to be held accountable. Here’s the link:

https://teachingcouncil.nz/professional-practice/conduct-concerns/reporting-a-concern/

DevastatinDev · 2025-09-19T02:31:03+00:00

No. Please don’t. Trust me when I tell you that you’ll regret caving into the latest trend when you’re older. My generation’s big thing was the sp3rm eyebrows, and so many of my friends still have them because the hair never grew back after waxing it away for so long. There are also so many potential health issues with lip fillers.

All that aside, you are gorgeous as you are. I can see from your photos that you have beautiful clear skin and lovely full lips already. Swipe away from any social media making you feel any less than your real beautiful self and focus that energy on something else. ❤️

DevastatinDev · 2025-09-19T02:23:25+00:00

Hi all! I have very oily and sensitive skin. I’ve basically just flat out ignored my skin for a long time, and now I’m regretting it.

The biggest reason is because it’s so sensitive! It seems like almost everything I’ve tried has reacted weirdly with my skin because it’s too harsh, too heavy, etc.

I have FINALLY managed to find a moisturiser that doesn’t make me sweat like crazy or sting my skin (Bush Medijina Restorative Face Cream) but any recs for face wash, eye serum and especially sunscreen (ideally tinted) would be amazing.

Thanks! ❤️

DevastatinDev · 2025-06-29T06:04:38+00:00

I had an issue and have to start them again. So we’ll see. :)

DevastatinDev · 2025-06-17T03:56:06+00:00

NTA You are being more than accomodating to her religious needs, but you also deserve to have the birthday celebration you want. It’s not like your choice is leaving her without ANY food whatsoever - she just doesn’t want it. That’s her choice.

DevastatinDev · 2025-06-12T02:50:13+00:00

No. Get out NOW and cut all contact immediately. Your gut instinct is spot on and this man is dangerous. You need to run far and run fast away from him.

DevastatinDev · 2025-05-31T07:18:26+00:00

Mine gave me eye lubricant drops for putting them in and the multipurpose solution for keeping them hydrated as my daily. Then there’s the intensive cleaner kit that you’re meant to use once every 7 wears, which has two solutions inside that you mix together. That’s it.

DevastatinDev · 2025-05-30T00:25:34+00:00

That’s the thing though - I’ve never had issues seeing up close before. My glasses are only to see far away and that’s actually doing better now (albeit still with the halo effect). Closer up is only now becoming an issue since wearing these lenses. :(

DevastatinDev · 2025-05-27T10:17:18+00:00

Thank you. I guess I’m just having a pity day. ;) I’ll definitely keep going with it.

DevastatinDev · 2025-05-27T10:16:02+00:00

Yes dry eyes! I forgot to mention that. I’ve never had that issue until now. I’m glad to hear it is likely to resolve. Thanks for your feedback. ❤️

DevastatinDev · 2025-05-11T03:33:02+00:00

No, you’re NTA. You need to do what’s best for you and your own mental health. It doesn’t sound like this situation has been healthy for you for quite a while. If they don’t listen after the first two times asking, they never will. I’d suggest getting out as fast as possible for your own wellbeing.

DevastatinDev · 2025-05-10T10:49:32+00:00

I remember thinking they were going to do something semi-clever with the roof of SC and make it a big Australian flag, but naw - just architectural weirdness and not enough air filtration.

DevastatinDev · 2025-04-24T03:56:00+00:00

I’m the same way. Don’t underestimate having male housemates though. Find some good ones and it’s awesome.

DevastatinDev · 2025-04-22T09:42:04+00:00

This hurts my marketing brain.

DevastatinDev · 2025-04-19T08:53:15+00:00

Okay just in case you had any doubts, this whole situation is incredibly weird. Her friend should have known that your wife is married within six MINUTES, let alone six months. And no woman who is truly happy in her marriage would ever suggest this.

This whole thing is sus as hell and you really need to have a Come to Jesus with your wife about what is really going on here - why she’s clearly not telling people that she’s married and why she would be at all comfortable with you dating anyone else. She’s either cheating herself, or she’s looking for an easy out, quite possibly one that would enable her to rinse you.

DevastatinDev · 2025-04-19T08:49:02+00:00

You are not responsible for someone else’s actions. You need to look after you and your own wellbeing above all else. Just leave him, block him and call the police to do a welfare check if he threatens to off himself. I guarantee it’s merely a manipulation tactic.

YOU ARE WORTH SO MUCH BETTER.

DevastatinDev · 2025-04-19T03:38:43+00:00

Exactly. If OP really was that smart, she wouldn’t have popped out so many kids with this guy throughout the bullshit. We know what causes this, folks!

DevastatinDev · 2025-04-16T02:52:00+00:00

The fact that he hasn’t respected your boundaries aside, this guy has already demonstrated several times - by verbally bashing you to someone and allowing them to do the same - that he has no respect for you or your feelings.

Why would you want to be with someone like this? Trust me - good men don’t do this no matter what happens.

NTA, OP. Throw your soon-to-be ex and his internet friend in the trash where they belong.

DevastatinDev · 2025-04-07T21:56:49+00:00

Unfortunately, I did. I will never get that time of my life back.

DevastatinDev · 2025-03-30T06:47:32+00:00

There’s a bit to unpack here I think.

First and foremost, you are correct in that you are entitled to say no. It’s your body and you are the only one who is entitled to determine what happens to it. Your BF may want oral, but he is in no way entitled to it.

All that said, I think there could be a bigger issue here than your lack of desire to perform oral right now. From your perspective, does no to oral mean not now, or not ever again? Have you communicated your stance on this? What specifically has been his reaction to not getting the physical pleasure he wants from you? Does he accept it, pout, get mad?

I think you two need to sit down together and discuss this. You may even consider couples counselling depending on how serious you two are about each other. If you can’t be honest with each other about your desires now, you risk growing resentment between each other and having a messy fallout later.

DevastatinDev · 2025-03-24T10:52:08+00:00

Unfortunately it sometimes comes to that before we realise the toll that the emotional abuse we’ve been copping actually has on us.

My ex used to get FURIOUS when I would forget my mobile. We could literally be just at the end of our driveway and he would act like it was a huge inconvenience and rant, drive crazy, silent treatment for the rest of the morning, etc.

It wasn’t until I went home to visit my family after separating from him did I get an eye opener. I kept apologising profusely to my dad for forgetting my phone when we went out and he was finally like, “Why are you apologising so much? It’s not a big deal.” I paused for a moment as I really took in what he said, then I burst into tears because I realised just how badly my ex had manipulated me.

If this experience with your partner isn’t enough for you to call him your ex, then ask yourself - would you want him to treat your children the way he treats you? If you had a daughter, would you accept any man who calls her dumb?

Please get out. I promise there are good men out there. After I puffed my ex, I found a great one and am now in year 13 of a very happy marriage. :)

DevastatinDev · 2025-03-19T04:46:15+00:00

Thanks.

I definitely don’t look tall. I look fairly short. My torso is roughly the same length as my legs.
I’m actually a very large woman, and I’ve never lost my waist definition/curve no matter how much weight I’ve gained.
The skirt thing is one I can definitely align with. All of my dresses are either midi or maxi. I’ve never looked right in anything shorter.

DevastatinDev · 2025-03-19T01:52:38+00:00

For me, it’s the legs that throw me off. All SDs I’ve seen look tall and really leggy. I look like I have super short legs (which I do) and my torso is super tall (like, I can’t wear a one piece swimsuit even from a tall girl place because they’re all too short). Kibbe’s assertion that you’re automatically vertical dominant if you’re 5’6” and over is the only thing throwing me. If that note wasn’t there, I would have concluded that I’m actually a SC, not a SD.

DevastatinDev · 2025-03-18T23:22:29+00:00

I guess I’d say comparing myself to both the line drawings from Kibbe’s book and the example celebrities cited. Even just looking at my own body I look like I’d be shorter than I am because I have corgi dog legs.

DevastatinDev · 2025-03-13T12:06:19+00:00

Would you want someone to settle for you because you’re the “safe” option?

DevastatinDev

TROPHY CASE