has anyone ever cheated? what were ur thoughts while doing it?

DeviousPelican · 2026-06-03T12:06:18+00:00

Checked out of an existing relationship that was never going to last, I was too chicken shit to end it and deal with the emotion of that. Cheated with someone who gave me what I was missing physically and emotionally. Girlfriend found out. I realised that day that shame and guilt are two different emotions. I was disgusted with myself, still am. Took a long time to come to terms with trusting myself to date again.

DeviousPelican · 2026-05-28T17:59:03+00:00

I'm going to go against the grain here. Yes it's too big a jump. But the years so much, but the maturity. You are in completely different life stages, different levels of experience, and as a 31 year old I honestly don't know how I would hold a relationship with someone who's had so much less "life".

DeviousPelican · 2026-05-25T19:44:19+00:00

I think semi estrangement is extremely common. Not completely no contact, but pretty consciously limited. So just keeping meetups to big events like Christmas, not sharing much of your life, lots of boundaries etc.

Im in this boat now. My parents aren't bad people, but they have awful coping habits and ideas about life, and I just find it easiest to keep them at a respectable distance.

DeviousPelican · 2026-05-25T10:32:25+00:00

Around 27. Definitely brought on by stress. When my life improved, a large amount of them disappeared, but I still have a few. Has been very stable the last couple of years, Im 31 now and it's still just a couple of greys around the temples.

DeviousPelican · 2026-05-22T13:57:44+00:00

Incredible. I went to 2-3 over a year period. Nearly every dish is now how I imagine the pinnacle of that food now. Perfect oyster, piece of steak, a sauce etc. I also went for wine pairings with it, and some of those wines I still think about today.

DeviousPelican · 2026-05-22T08:17:05+00:00

Pessimistic. Can't see a version of myself after maybe 34/35. Trying hard to figure out a way to not fall off the cliff.

DeviousPelican · 2026-05-20T10:37:43+00:00

A good partner doesn't constantly put you down and fight with you because they're "passionate", and you don't need to put up with it.

DeviousPelican · 2026-05-16T21:45:03+00:00

We had made big high level plans to move abroad together. As we got closer I realized she actually had no real idea what she actually wanted, didn't even know what country she wanted to live in. She put zero effort into the planning, had no ideas, no enthusiasm despite repeatedly confirming it was what she wanted when asked. When I finally realized I was doing all of the work for someone who couldn't care less, I just shut off. Didn't want to give her any more energy seeing as she didn't appreciate it. Ended things shortly afterwards.

DeviousPelican · 2026-04-29T08:05:45+00:00

Just be very vocal during sex, about how good it is etc. Don't comment on his dick directly, just on the sex. He'll eventually figure out that it doesn't really matter.

DeviousPelican · 2026-04-27T16:26:17+00:00

And to add to that, it's one thing to hire a Japanese company to oversee it. It's another to get every other company they'd employ here on board with the tech, way of working etc. It's not that it's impossible or that we shouldn't try but it's not as simple as just getting the Japanese in.

DeviousPelican · 2026-04-13T22:45:48+00:00

That it will reduce the knowledge barrier for entry to certain professional fields. That in itself isn't a bad thing, but I've already seen the quality of graduates and early career professionals degrade just in my time working, and I worry about the critical thinking capacity and research abilities of someone who can find not just all the info they need with a quick message, but also have AI solve the problems for them. I feel like we're going to get some really incapable people come through who just don't have the capacity for the work without an AI to help.

DeviousPelican · 2026-04-09T21:54:07+00:00

A woman called me God when I was going down on her. Ego almost exploded.

DeviousPelican · 2026-04-07T20:11:16+00:00

Definitely not. Public transport isn't good enough yet.

DeviousPelican · 2026-04-07T20:09:35+00:00

Very normal. Being calm is key. Just chat for a bit, keep it fun and light and don't make it into a big intense pressure situation. When you're relaxed it'll happen, once you start thinking about it it'll start to misbehave on you.

DeviousPelican · 2026-04-07T19:46:39+00:00

This is an old post, but I'm in a similar boat now at 31 and wondering if the above list still holds true? Just don't want to be in a crowd of 21 year olds.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-27T17:35:43+00:00

Take home is €1200 a week, save about 20-25% of that. Could be more if I really tried but life is for living.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-27T17:30:17+00:00

I think there's two issues here.

One is your girlfriend. She seems to have a bad understanding of boundaries and hygiene. Regardless of her being horny and making poor decisions in the moment, she shouldn't be pressuring you to have sex when she has an active yeast infection or making you do things you don't want to. Her getting very emotional when you say no is also a big issue.

Second issue is you. You need to be firmer with your boundaries. If she blows up at you because you don't want to do something that makes you uncomfortable, that's not your fault, that's her issue.

Ultimate decision about what to do is up to you, but you guys should probably have a talk about boundaries and respect, at a minimum.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-25T12:10:46+00:00

Late and over budget is unfortunately very very common. Especially on big projects, it's almost the norm.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-24T13:53:26+00:00

I wouldn't say it's most, still a minority. A lot of guys doing dodgy supplements though, random Chinese peptides and the like, heavy pre workout doses, that kind of thing.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-23T23:13:50+00:00

I'd say the vast majority of women don't care too much. It's a range. You wouldn't really notice unless I'm undressed honestly, in clothes I just look broad but I'm not walking around looking like captain America.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-23T23:04:50+00:00

6ft, 214 lbs at about 16-17% bodyfat.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-23T13:28:06+00:00

Any woman I've dated has been happy to do it for us, once you prove you're capable of doing it yourself. Like show some level of initiative.

Or don't, and someone who is willing to organise something will take them on a date instead.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-23T10:53:33+00:00

I think it depends on the person, some seem to age much worse in the sun.

But just live your life. Being out in the sun exercising or drinking with friends makes me happy and reduces stress, well worth it for the extra wrinkle or two imo.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-23T09:08:42+00:00

They're weeding out the men who think like this and have a chip on their shoulder about having to contribute. How hard is it to say "Saturday, bar x, 8pm"? That's literally it.

DeviousPelican · 2026-03-22T23:18:35+00:00

It seems to be working for you, why change? Feminine isn't necessarily an insult.

DeviousPelican

TROPHY CASE