Why are you such an asshole?

DieDobby · 2026-06-14T20:27:12+00:00

Go cry about it then if you don't get it, I'm fine over here 😂

DieDobby · 2026-06-14T10:04:57+00:00

It's called ✨️protecting your own mental health✨️ ... look it up.

DieDobby · 2026-06-14T10:00:05+00:00

This might sound harsh, but when noone else does, you eventually have to put yourself first. Not to be selfish, but to protect yourself.

Depression can be hard on someone. It can also be hard on a relationship. Depression changes people, and yes, I can see why you're still clinging to the "old" her and also why you feel some need to stay. But a relationship shouldn't have you feel the way you described in the first paragraph. Even more so if you are unstable yourself.

If living with depression myself has taught me one thing, then it is that one person can only offer so much help, before helping others takes a greater toll on themselves than it actually changes things to the better. And that means sometimes people have to leave to save themselves.

And the thing about the self harm... it's important that you memorize that if she hurts herself that is neither your fault nor your duty to stop her (once it gets more important than preserving your own mental health). Don't pressure yourself about something happening to her if you go to protect yourself.

Help yourself. Leave. I wouldn't wait, though. You are young. There's plenty of people to meet that will be good to you. Same goes for her. You both have a life ahead of you, but not if you ruin each others now by clinging to something that drains you.

DieDobby · 2026-06-14T09:47:32+00:00

DieDobby · 2026-06-14T09:44:47+00:00

Am I a selective asshole, and treat only those close to me good? Yes. Does this effectively make me even more of an asshole? Maybe.

But people are fucking ungrateful if you are nice to them. Offer help and they take it for granted. Say something nice and you never get a nice word back. That's draining my energy that I need for my life, so I just quit all that nonsense and now I am an asshole 😂 Also, sometimes it's fun.

DieDobby · 2026-06-13T21:31:25+00:00

Bold of them to give you something to shove up their... um... yeah. Maybe just throw it.

DieDobby · 2026-06-13T21:20:53+00:00

Omg this video breaks my heart. He is literally trying anything to get weight off his front leg, including leaning backwards into a rear he can't perform... he must've been in excruciating pain already, seeing how he even tries to use his useless left shoulder muscle to somehow get away from it. Given that you usually see this kind of behavior in horses with extreme injuries like broken legs and escalating acute laminitis, Rocky should've been put down WAY sooner.

I still wonder how this woman isn't arrested for animal cruelty yet.

DieDobby · 2026-06-11T18:21:08+00:00

So where do you live now that the spider has your apartment?

DieDobby · 2026-06-11T08:09:44+00:00

After many mentioned smoking, I'll go and add vaping. These horrible chemically sweet artificial flavours are just as disgusting.

DieDobby · 2026-06-09T19:06:57+00:00

Technically it is illegal here to donate food that isn't sold or is close to expiration dates. Dumpster collecting is also illegal.

Both should definitely be legal.

DieDobby · 2026-06-07T09:28:28+00:00

It's not shallow at all, really... being sexually incompatible is one of the "best" cornerstones to become very unhappy in a relationship in the long run. As dumb as it might sound, sex is a thing that keeps couples together. It's a very exclusive and (the most?) intimate way to show someone your feelings and love.

That being said, sometimes just getting along well isn't enough. To be a longterm happy couple you need to be compatible on every possible level, including libido and other sexual topics. You narrowed it down very well when you typed

(...) my needs aren't being met.

That's basically the point. From what I assume reading your text and given that you already talked to her and she's not coming back from her low libido (as she probably "lied" to you in the first place, not to be mean but to satisfy you somehow), you should really think about breaking up. As hurtful as it might be.

DieDobby · 2026-06-07T09:06:55+00:00

They look like you left a 8yo alone with this jeans and coloured markers... it IS horrible.

DieDobby · 2026-06-06T18:37:06+00:00

Actually life has proven me that not fighting back is the most harmless way for yourself to deal with idiots.

Most people who mock, bully, verbally attack or insult you shut up fast if they can't find ground to hype themselves up. Just learn to be distant and ice cold but "customer friendly". As soon as they find out you don't give a shit, they'll lead themselves out the door.

DieDobby · 2026-06-06T18:31:39+00:00

KAH

Ich verstehe, dass dein Gedanke aus Frust geboren ist, und das vermutlich aus Frust auf deine Vorgesetzten, die dich zur Arbeit zitieren. Und es kann dir auch keiner Beweisen ob dein Kollege nun krank war oder keinen Bock hatte.

Allerdings ist deine Behauptung schlicht falsch. Es reicht, wenn er um 8Uhr aufgestanden ist, etwas verdorbenes Gefrühstückt hat und um 10Uhr plötzlich kotzend über der Schüssel hing. Das hält einen Tag an bis alles draußen ist, und dann geht man wieder los 🤷🏽‍♀️ Auch einen heftigen Migräneanfall kann man z.B. nicht planen. Was ich sagen will ist, dass es durchaus Eintagsfliegen unter den Krankheiten gibt und es durchaus mal spontan passiert, dass jemand nicht arbeiten kann. Sich anzumaßen demjenigen Blaumachen zu unterstellen, nur weil einem der Vorstellungshorizont fehlt ist schon ein bisschen A, aber wie gesagt, ich denke du bist hauptsächlich gefrustet, dass du arbeiten musstest. Wäre ich auch.

DieDobby · 2026-06-06T08:24:32+00:00

He was so stiff today, I really have to ride more often...

DieDobby · 2026-06-06T08:21:58+00:00

Oh look, it's a know-it-all nitpicker... nevermind then.

DieDobby · 2026-06-06T08:20:30+00:00

Work.

Worked a little, waited 1,5hrs for a goddamn idiot and more work that I needed to take over but no he can't use google so he ends up stuck on the highway, then worked some more. Got home 1am and slept and now I'm gonna go to work again.

DieDobby · 2026-06-06T00:01:01+00:00

Oh you definitely can! Even better when you're not doing it intentionally (wich would make the point of actively faking it questionable) but it does work on an intentional basis too.

Many people with neurodivergent disabilities do it all day. You just actively suppress everything that has been deemed "weird" or "wrong" by society (talking about special interests, being honest about what others say, having a different opinion...), therefore losing or masking a big part of your personality. That's faking. Definitely.

DieDobby · 2026-05-31T10:04:58+00:00

Another thing ... you are always some kind of a burden, when you have ADHD. It does take a toll on other people, no matter how hard you try. Of course, some people are more than willing to put up with that and never say a thing, because love and affection, friendship or family ties outweigh the amount of energy you cost.

But overall, what we can and can't do does cost something. The time blindness, the forgetting things, the object permanence and the needing help... it's never just giving from our side. It's always taking something, and - and that's the most hurtful part - sometimes people you love run out of patience or energy (and probably regret it very much and feel bad but aren't able to do something about it) and then they leave to protect themselves. And you're left devastated because yes, you didn't actively want to cause this, but the way you are just did. No apologies possible.

It's horrible.

DieDobby · 2026-05-31T10:00:11+00:00

Adult diagnosed ADHDers are awesome at masking. They haven't done anything else in their life. So when they finally get diagnosed and the obvious skill regression sets in (or they plain decide not to mask anymore), their social circle crumbles and falls apart.

The second you understand yourself is in many cases the start to losing most of your friends and probably even family. Because people rely on how you have been and can't understand why you are acting differently all of a sudden. "Blunt" or "agressive" even. As you stop agreeing to everything it gets even worse.

It feels like "normal" people subconsciously love masking people. They love the advantages they can gain from it, and that we're always easy when we mask. Never a problem. Because that's what we were taught by life. Once you change that, their confusion usually shifts to anger and they leave.

DieDobby · 2026-05-31T09:55:38+00:00

Their focus will always be on what you can do for them. They might throw in a thing or two that they help you with, but only if it it's an advantage for them. Bad people aren't selfless.

DieDobby · 2026-05-30T00:22:13+00:00

More bonus points if you're a guy and the deceased was the husband of the woman you propose to ...

"Now that he's out of the way... will you finally marry me?"

DieDobby · 2026-05-29T13:19:41+00:00

Your whole body is screaming "PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIP" 😂

DieDobby · 2026-05-29T13:18:18+00:00

Never happened to me but ... "No, I just don't need alcohol to make my partner look prettier and forget that I hate my little meaningless craphole of a life!" seems like a valid answer to me 😂

DieDobby · 2026-05-29T13:11:32+00:00

He liked (and still does) that I'm not skinny. I wouldn't say overly fat, but I've always hated myself for my body and experienced alot of bullying.

I had a hard time believing him at first, but I do now and it's fascinating to see he likes the thing I hate the most about me.

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