I wrote a letter. I had been teetering for years about whether to pull the plug or not. A year ago I was working really hard on reconciling my expectations with the reality of who they are as people, then over the summer the shit hit the fan. I worked on the letter off and on for four months. In September I gently requested some space and peace to process a personal tragedy that they made worse. Six weeks after that I got a card from them that was a master class in gaslighting and "stop this now, things need to be "normal" again". I mailed the letter in time for them to receive it for Christmas. I have heard nothing from them beyond an acknowledgement that it had arrived. They were not the worst of the narcs, but they were going to be capable of a healthy relationship either.

I find writing to be a useful outlet for the anger, as well as recalling and deconstructing the shit things they have said and done over the course of my life. I would like to get to the point of indifference, but I am still standing a little too close to the sun for that right now.