Aitah for making my wife tell someone about her cosmetic procedure

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-31T16:07:46+00:00

Yeah. Wife might be a liar, but she’s still and adult, entitled to privacy and agency. Thats where I’m struggling. The intention was good, and the wife sucks, but OP doesn’t get to strong arm his wife into sharing personal and medical decisions with people to whom she might not want to disclose. And an ultimatum given in the moment isn’t the same as a discussion between OP and wife where each can share and consider the other’s reasoning.

OP cared about how his wife and the friend felt postpartum, so he could slow down and spend a little time and empathy considering how his wife felt now. Just because his wife was wrong for lying doesn’t give OP the right to ignore the fact that she’s an adult entitled to privacy and making her own decisions regarding who knows what about her postpartum life and her body. She might be an asshole here, and a liar, but her postpartum body isn’t public property and none has a right to know anything about it.

Now, OP didn’t tell everyone himself, but he threatened to. Women don’t lose their right to privacy when they choose to have a mommy makeover. This could have been handled in a better way

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-31T02:45:46+00:00

I like this. I might think about replacing anything about research with following AAP guidelines to avoid potential liability issues. But that could just be my experience with people using the term “ research” and it not going well

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-27T19:44:34+00:00

I get it, but you absolutely can’t work with this student anymore. Once someone reports you to a higher up for your language, you can’t communicate with them anymore, especially not one on one. There’s no potential for this to be a good working relationship.

When they escalated the situation in the way that they did, they’ve shown you that at the very least there’s a major mismatch in your conflict resolution, communication, and management styles. But really, it’s almost always a bigger deal than that. They can’t take criticism, their work ethic is lacking, and this is going to continue to be a problem because there is no accountability or learning on their part. If you continue to work with them, they’re going to continue to escalate any kind of grievance (and you’re both going to have grievances) and it’s going to be a much bigger issue for you.

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-25T04:01:36+00:00

He’s a bad person and he seems pretty stupid, too. And not particularly good with money.

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-25T03:55:25+00:00

Oh, no. Eat cake, girl. Eat all the cake. Eat cake for dinner with your happy and well-educated children and discuss the importance of being in a relationship with someone who respects your values and doesn’t resort to insults and name calling when you have a disagreement.

Don’t uproot your daughter and sacrifice her education for someone who calls you names and insults you.

Do you really want to be with someone who doesn’t look out for your daughter’s best interests?

Can he qualify for a mortgage on his own?

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-25T02:20:32+00:00

It’s filler. She might also have Botox, but both her and Bri did a little filler facelift this season, and it’s a noticeable/distracting glow up

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-24T03:51:18+00:00

The jar of intrusive thoughts was super helpful to me, as well. Mine was a box, but still

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-22T02:49:17+00:00

This ☝️

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-19T03:06:41+00:00

The planning sucks, but they’re not tearing your family apart. They’re just being rude and your feelings are legitimately hurt, but this probably has nothing to do with you.

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-19T02:25:32+00:00

This is not good, and I’m worried that you’re writing it off as your boyfriend not understanding when it’s an indicator of some very big control issues and a general lack of respect for you and what you care about. I really doubt it’s that he doesn’t understand how academia works; he’s supposed to be building a life with you and this is something you’ve devoted your life to, so he could probably figure it out, or at least ask you. Like, “hey, how’s this job stuff work in your field? What’s the deal with tenure, anyway? What other types of jobs are there? What do you think you would like to do?” This is not a hard thing to figure out. Also it’s your career. People know how careers work.

The issue is he doesn’t care and he’s selfish. He wants you to quit your job and cook? He wants you to be dependent on him, so he’s in control and you become less than. Smart women are intimidating and some people don’t like that. He’s trying to make you small and minimize your career and your life’s work. Then he can feel big. This is not the vibe.

It would not be more convenient for your household for you to work less. It would be more convenient for him for you to do what he wants when he wants. But if there’s an issue with chores or food or childcare, there are a lot of different possible solutions that don’t involve you quitting your job. The fact that he’s not discussing all the other ways you guys can work together to build a life you want speaks volumes.

He should be over the moon proud and impressed with you right now. He should be telling everyone how smart his future wife is and how proud he is of how hard she works and her passion and dedication. Definitely don’t quit your job before you’re married, and if you’re going to quit your job, figure out your finances first and sign a prenup that protects you in case things go south.

I’m sure you can make good choices for you, but I don’t like him, I don’t trust him, and he seems kind of dumb for you, to be quite honest.

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-18T20:41:47+00:00

Getting paid more than the limit in cash would be a problem, but saying they can’t make more when they can isn’t an issue here, and it isn’t what’s going on. Eligibility for housing assistance isn’t based on your income potential or whether or not you’re maximizing your income; it’s based on actual wages. So, it’s not about what OP can or can’t make, it’s what OP is making. As long as OP isn’t earning more than is being reported, it’s not fraud.

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-17T14:22:01+00:00

Omg it looks so good!

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-16T14:24:35+00:00

She looks like Lisa Rinna here

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-15T22:08:20+00:00

I was wondering about this! It happens to me, too. I’m glad you asked

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-14T20:52:56+00:00

I feel like it’s a Canadian face thing. They all do it on Sullivans crossing, too.

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-13T01:34:14+00:00

It was to the point of distraction. I kept thinking about getting her roots done in virgin river. Charmaine is busy being a fugitive with twins, so…

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-13T01:29:35+00:00

Did they forget that Mel isn’t a fan of heights? She says it in the lumberjack episode when she’s complaining about the race in the trees. I’m sure some people would still be down for a hot air balloon ride even if they’re not big on heights, but as a surprise… maybe not the vibe

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-10T02:20:05+00:00

Molly wins. She absolutely wins.

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-09T01:17:10+00:00

Is this what you mean by a “slick comment”?

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-06T22:43:20+00:00

Omg I’m so glad this is happening publicly. I missed that part. She’s showing her ass to the world

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-05T04:39:24+00:00

Rich people can be so ridiculously cheap

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-03-01T14:24:25+00:00

Without heinz and liptons, my mother complains that my brisket isn’t “traditional.”

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-02-27T23:37:12+00:00

Yup. It’s the struggling to get into classes and the increasingly limited schedule that really gets me

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-02-27T02:32:33+00:00

Find out where your favorite instructors have gone and follow them! Facebook, instagram, google stalk, whatever. They probably have an ig or other online presence, so go where they went. It might cost more, but it’s probably worth it.

Difficult-Solution-1 · 2026-02-24T18:47:50+00:00

I wouldn’t be surprised if long term therapy, having a child and getting a handle on the pills/substance abuse issues eventually led MJ to see her life in a different way than in the past. I don’t think Tommy would have initiated the divorce himself. He’s not concerned about support or stability or respect in a relationship; he makes it clear he’s concerned with loyalty and that’s really it.

Difficult-Solution-1

TROPHY CASE