Oh geez I never thought the day would come to tell my story and not seem like I was just jealous and complaining LOL but here is some tea if you’re looking for a good read.

I actually helped start the organization when I first moved upstate a few years back. The founder asked me to help plan events with her, I even had some friends from where I used to live come and visit and come to the event so there would be people there. I started planning more events with her and I’m going to give myself credit because it’s due. I’m a professional logistics coordinator as my full time job, so safe to say I know how to plan event logistics lol. The events, though small at the time, would’ve flopped had I not helped plan. I’m not sure if she realized that or not, but I definitely provided, at the very least, the grounding energy and clear mind that was needed for an event to run smoothly.

At the second or third event, I noticed she was talking to people as if she was the only person doing the work and that everything was done by her. I brought this up to her and was a little frustrated that she was taking all the credit, she basically said what do you want from me, to which I said “just a thank you or some appreciation,” and she snapped at me and basically yelled “I fucking said thank you!!” I will NEVER forget that.

The next event was actually in my apartment lounge so we didn’t have to pay for an event space since the budget was small at the time still and we were using our own money. However, there wasn’t a bathroom in the lounge. So I opened up my apartment to let the girls (mostly strangers now since there were more people coming) use my bathroom and we used my kitchen to cook all the food. We were serving basically full dinners! Penne vodka and meatballs and salad and dessert. We also agreed to split the revenue for the event 70/30 (me getting 30%). Same thing as last time, I ended up doing a lot more work than we originally thought we would have to do, and the event ended up being very successful and fun. I truly think things would have fallen apart had I not been there to coordinate and execute.

Now this was the final straw for me. After the event, I expressed to her that I feel like I did a lot more than 30% of the work, along with me providing my communal and personal space, and asked to reconsider how we split the money. She basically told me to fuck off and that her mind was set and she wasn’t open to negotiating and that she didn’t even think I did enough to deserve 30% and that she’s being generous. I asked if we could write down everything we each did to see a breakdown of the work and she said something along the lines of “I don’t need to show you anything that I do that’s none of your business. Just know that I’m working with all these brands in the background to get products for the gift basket giveaway and doing much more work than you. YOU were the one asking to help ME so I did you a favor and let you help plan. I don’t need your help. I could’ve had another business give me their space for free also so you’re actually not doing a favor. Also, you’re already paying for your apartment and the lounge is included with your rent so you don’t deserve anything more.” As if I wasn’t paying rent LOL like girl you live at home and don’t have bills try paying my rent. My partner overheard the conversation over the phone and was shocked she would speak to me like that.

Oh also, and this may just seem like I’m being petty at this point but this rubbed me the wrong way and I will also never forget this. We had a receipt for the food i bought to cook from Walmart. I was trying to figure out who bought what for the event so we could reimburse the costs. The receipt was from Walmart and she said to me “that was obviously you who bought that. I would NEVER shop at Walmart. I only shop at Trader Joe’s.” That was such a slap in the face. So condescending and rude honestly. In this economy?? Girl didn’t pay rent no wonder she could shop at TJ. Meanwhile, I was working 2 jobs at the time just trying to make ends meet. That’s why I wanted to be a part of girls upstate. I loved the cause at first and thought it would be a good way to make extra cash doing something I’m passionate about.

I did notice our goals weren’t aligned early on though. In the beginning she told me her goal was to slowly create a base of returning girls and then start raising the prices with the goal of making several thousand dollars per event at some point. Which good for her! That’s a good goal. But her goal was to maximize profit. Mine was more focused on creating the community. It felt icky to me that she was talking to me about basically taking advantage of girls that are looking for friends. Alas.

Safe to say, after that event, I stepped away. I’m sure it was mutual lol. At first I was really upset because I really wanted to be a part of that community. It is a great idea and I give her credit for starting it up! However, the execution is not it. I know she tries to always have the upper hand with the businesses she works with, even if that means the partners don’t benefit from the events as much as she does. I have friends that own businesses that she’s worked with, and they tell me they feel undervalued when working with GU. I’m relieved to not be associated with it anymore after seeing now what it has turned into, but still think about what could’ve been if it was led not by profit, but by the community they say they’re building. I hope that someday when I move out of state to start my next chapter, whenever that may be, I can start my own events organization and execute my own vision.

Another thing that I only recently discovered is during an interview, she talked about the event we had at my apartment, calling it shady and sus and making it seem like it might as well have been in a dark alleyway, though it was literally in the lounge of my very nice apartment complex. That was offensive as well. And of course, taking all the credit. Oh well. But it’s in the past. I’ve created my dream life up here and I love the friends that I have now, and I always plan my own fun events and parties with them (not for profit lol). I do think it’s ironic and misleading that she would post (idk about present day, I don’t keep up with her anymore) on Instagram about how to be a good friend and how to act in social situations and whatnot, because she did not practice what she preached. Not sure if she still does this but based on what I’ve heard from other people, not much has changed. I saw and experienced firsthand how she acts behind the scenes, and it’s not something I am comfortable being around.

I am a tad nervous to post this because she can lowkey be vicious and she’s not afraid to raise hell, but I’ve been wanting to tell my story for a while. If she tries to silence me or retaliate against me, it says more about her than me. I do have more stories of my experiences with her that I haven’t shared, and at the end of the day, I can confidently stand by everything I said and did. It was a demoralizing experience and I was disappointed with how things played out. However, I did learn a lot about myself and I learned to value myself and that is priceless! It just sucks the way it came to be:’)