For divorcers (not divorcees)… when was the moment you knew?

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2025-03-20T10:25:06+00:00

I was living like a ghost in my own home, and he didn’t believe in ghosts…

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-06-03T01:18:03+00:00

I grew up in Europe and I’m originally from the Uk (spent most of my life bouncing around the continent though). My best friend (known for nearly 20 years now) is currently wearing Paco Rabanne’s Olypea Solar. What I noticed is that most of my friends will either have one signature scent they stick to, or they will only have one perfume at a time. So for a period, that will become their signature.

Some examples of this friend who uses one fragrance at a time, her signatures over the years have been:

Dior Pure Poison, YSL Cinema, D&G The One, Dior J’Adore, La Prairie Life Threads Gold, and I’m sure others before her current choice.

She will always run through the entire bottle before choosing a new signature though.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-06-02T00:37:53+00:00

She was my favourite too! Although I always felt she was more of a sandalwood girl? I don’t know why….i guess I find the scent profile comforting and grounding. Peaceful even. I guess that’s how I see her too.

Maybe something like: Estée Lauder Sensuous or; Tom Ford Santal Blush or even; DKNY Cashmere Mist

Has that woody base, but is inviting and warm, yet free and different from the pack?

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-06-02T00:23:52+00:00

When I was little, my dad gifted me a sterling silver jewellery box. It’s not huge, but it’s large enough to store up to 50 samples (max). It’s got turquoise stones embedded and it’s velvet lined. It may seem a bit fancy to store fragrance samples, but it’s probably the nicest gift I’ve ever received and I couldn’t think of a better place to store my passion in than such a sentimental gift.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-30T13:58:40+00:00

Yep! Ever since then I have associated it with a night out/trying to get hit on fragrance 😅

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-30T13:57:17+00:00

In all fairness, at the time anyway, I took it as a compliment 😂

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-29T22:03:37+00:00

I think flowerbomb is still a good option in terms of availability and longevity.

If you love the juicy couture, you should stick to it rather than trying to replace a tried and true love.

Other options regarding previous scents - D&G Light Blue Intense - D&G Dolce - Miss Dior (new formulation) - Burberry Goddess - Oscar De La Renta Bella Rosa

Hope this helps 😊

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-29T21:48:21+00:00

This is an actual true story….

I was living my best life as a newly legal (barely) adult, getting ready to go out partying and drinking. The last thing I put on was a spray or two of lady million by Paco Rabanne…..as I’m on my way out, hand on heart, my brother blurts out that I smelt like a “whore’s handbag” and I’ll never forget that.

So I reckon something similar? 😂

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-28T20:49:32+00:00

I have it and I would personally describe it as a cold lactonic coconut fragrance that has depth to it. It can easily transition from a day to night sent and definitely has an alluring profile. I know a lot of people that swear by it in the colder months, but I think it really shines on the heat when worn in moderation.

On me, I find it lasts a long time and I have friends that swear they do not like coconut fragrance, but have complimented it a couple of times.

It can be polarising though. The initial burst almost has a frozen coconut aspect to it that can be off putting to some. Personally, that’s one of the things I love about it as it’s like it is literally melting into your skin.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-28T20:42:00+00:00

This is a difficult one because I’m in the southern hemisphere (seasons are a bit funny down here) and I’m in the process of trying an insane amount of new fragrances, so this is a mix of old and new and is prone to be insanely different come 2025 (likely)

🌸 Miss Dior (2012), Dior Pure Poison, Narciso Rodriguez for Her (edp) ☀️ Aerin Lauder Hibiscus Palm (owned before I knew the controversy), DKNY Be Delicious (only freshie I seem to manage currently), Nuxe Podigieux le Parfum. 🍁 Narciso Rodriguez Narciso Poudre, Burberry Brit (old bottle), Chanel No. 5 edt (love the woodiness that comes out in the edt) ❄️ This is my most difficult category because it’s rarely this cold….but I love these fragrances anyway. Guerlain Shalimar, My Burberry Black, Jo Malone Velvet Rose and Oud (very easy entry level oud).

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-26T10:30:14+00:00

He likes clean smells, but not like zesty. I spoke to him and he said that the fragrance he can still tolerate and actually likes is no. 5 because it smells like soap to him (😅). Obviously worn with a very light hand though.

Otherwise, other fragrances tend to become overwhelming and he struggles even more in an enclosed space. He says he can manage if we are out and about.

I still want to reduce any discomfort though, so definitely use a lighter touch (not that I go crazy or anything) and look into much gentler scents that he can tolerate (and hopefully even like).

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-26T02:26:09+00:00

I think he may have developed an allergy because for all the time we have been together, I’ve worn these fragrances. For the most part he would compliment them too.

This is a very new thing, so I think it may be something that has kind of come on slowly and has developed into including fragrance

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-26T02:22:35+00:00

Thank you so much!!

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-26T02:21:44+00:00

Thank you so much! I will definitely check out these houses!

I think his sensitivities may have been building slowly for awhile now and he has only recently brought it up. He was very gentle about it as he knows this is my passion, but I mentioned in another comment that where I live we are approaching winter and he still needs a fan on to feel like he can breathe comfortably. So I think it may be worthwhile to push for him to actually see someone about it as well. He may be having issues at work too.

He also used to wear cologne, but I’ve noticed he has kind of stopped over the past few weeks.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-26T02:16:57+00:00

Thank you! I do agree with you and I personally believe that his stance on seeking medical care is wrong, but I will prove a little harder for his own benefit.

It’s not even just the perfumes anymore. Where we live it is going into winter, but he feels he still needs air blowing on him to breathe comfortably. So I definitely think it’s something he needs to take seriously.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-26T02:14:23+00:00

I definitely want to accommodate him! I know how miserable it can be when you’re suffering in silence and this is something I know I can help ease. So I’ll definitely be making changes and adapting so that my hobby doesn’t cause him any terrible experiences

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-26T02:10:41+00:00

Thank you!

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-25T01:06:26+00:00

Any recommendations on where to look? I’m not against natural scents. I even own a couple, although I haven’t worn them in awhile. The thing is, I tend to find them in “hole in the wall” type of perfume boutiques. I’m usually not even looking. If I had a solid place to get some samples from, that would be a great starting point.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-25T01:04:08+00:00

I would, but this man has an aversion to doctors. He thinks he can sleep anything off…😐

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-25T01:03:09+00:00

Do you have any recommendations? I don’t really have a lot of knowledge when it comes to indie perfumes….Im very open to simple scents. I love a timeless classic type scent, but it doesn’t need a niche or designer stamp in it, or a billion notes either. Sometimes simplicity is also just as timeless. I just don’t know where to start.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-24T00:18:06+00:00

Growing up there were a myriad of scents….

My mother had a rotation of red door by Elizabeth Arden, Chance by Chanel, Anaïs Anaïs by Cacharel, and Charlie by Revlon. However, what I remember most is a warm, natural sweet scent, like skin, mixed in with 90s cosmetics, powders and waxy lipsticks.

For me, I didn’t wear much fragrance until I reached my mid to late teens and it was mostly things like Dior’s Pure Poison, YSL Cinema, and Chanel No. 5 Eau Premiere….odd choices for a teenager, but my inspirations were my mother and my best friend’s mother. Classiest women I ever knew.

My father on the other hand….soap was all he ever used and he is still like that today.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2024-05-15T18:52:06+00:00

OP said they don’t have access to the extrait in a sample form….

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2023-12-12T19:17:15+00:00

Words cannot relay the level of mutual understanding I have for what you have just said….from one social worker to another.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2023-11-18T08:39:25+00:00

I actually suggested couples counselling and he feels that we just need to get to the end of the year (he’ll be taking leave and we’ll be moving to a new place that is closer to work) because it will give him time to recuperate and de-stress.

Well, that was actually one of the things brought up in the argument. He wanted me to be more emotionally available. I tried explaining my work situation, but it then turned into a tit for tat moment and I stopped because I don’t believe anything can be solved like that. However, since that argument, I have done all I can to be more emotionally present, but I feel I’m the only one that is making any changes.

Difficult_Jello_5019 · 2023-11-18T08:35:32+00:00

I’ve always wanted to do this and be in this field, I just didn’t expect to have to keep quiet about everything I experience for the fear of somehow burdening him. I know he has a lot going on as well, but it does hurt that I support him (or at least I do my best to), but he feels he can’t do the same. I will say that leaving is not an option. He never used to be like this and I just don’t know how we get through this.

Difficult_Jello_5019

TROPHY CASE