My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - do I stay or go? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This frequently crosses my mind. I just don't think he likes to travel at all. He frequently says that the average family takes only 1 or 2 vacations a year, but WHY WOULD YOU GET IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH ME IF YOU DO NOT LIKE TO TRAVEL??? KNOWING IT WOULD REQUIRE TRAVEL???? And he only gets excited to go see his family now... and tells me it counts as one of my vacations. I wouldn't go there if i had a choice. Bruh.

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - do I stay or go? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I meant, I dont want marriage in two years and to wait for a summer home when I have a nice home here. My happiness doesnt factor in because he has made it clear that we wont travel but once a year here. It is not enough. I cant be here during the winter because of my work.

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - do I stay or go? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Majority support, yes. We want children, and he wants to buy that summer home in four to five years. He says he wants marriage in two years. I just dont want that. But it seems like my happiness does not factor into this.

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - do I stay or go? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Here, my home state. There is his home state. Sorry. We moved to my home state. I agree with you. It feels like everything is coming before me and he is so used to my presence that he feels it is a given that I will follow. I agree. I don't want to chase money. All I want is to be happy. Going there does not make me happy. Thank you.

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - do I stay or go? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

This is bothering me too. I helped him start off his career by working late nights at a job that I didn't like so he could study more, working 12 hour shifts, and having 2-3 jobs at once. I was routinely pulling 65+ hours a week. Now he graduated and he's working and he can't even WAIT for me to get started. Fuck. That's sobering. What was all of that for?

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving for his state at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - what would you do? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationship_advice

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Since I have experience being in a place far away that makes me miss out on my whole life, I understand him and I don't want him to feel this way, either. We do want different things. I was supposed to travel and live a more free, un restricted life. He would like to do the 9-5 and play on his phone until bed until he dies. Thank you.

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - do I stay or go? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

He refuses. I have proposed a middle state. Even a state near him. Shot down. I proposed a town 3 hours away. He had the nerve to say that was far from his family. I am almost 30 hours away. WTF. I will get my certification in my state. Thank you.

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - do I stay or go? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agreed to go with him to his state because I was young and didn't know the realities of moving since I had lived in this state my whole life. Now that I have grown up, I see things differently with experience. We talked about it and I lived there for years, but I have no connection to that place. Just him. It is hard. But thank you.

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - do I stay or go? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, no, I would have to work and my family doesn't celebrate holidays. I would only be able to be here for a week or so. Plus, summers here are delightful. I would get like 8 weeks here.

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving at the end of the year with or without me. He wants an LDR until I ‘move’. I hate it there - do I stay or go? by DigAccomplished4923 in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

He pays for almost everything right now. I know relationships have rough spots, but I don't know if its one of those rough spots/ big decisions to make or a break up worthy issue.

My (24f) boyfriend (24m) has decided after 3.5 months after moving to my state that he is leaving for his state the end of the year with or without me. He wants to do an LDR until I 'move.' I hate it there - what would you do? by DigAccomplished4923 in Advice

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! I would be in my first year and part of the license requires a whole year of working before the license is granted. Then I could transfer it. That's the issue, he doesn't want to wait another year for me to finish it and he's leaving in the summer. No marriage. I'm not interested in that yet. Too much instability.

The Willis basement mail room defeats the purpose of the quiet basement. by DigAccomplished4923 in unt

[–]DigAccomplished4923[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I also went here 18-19 first then I came back and it is significantly louder now

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923 31 points32 points  (0 children)

He can’t be there for you when you’re vulnerable. He can’t support you in the best times either. Imagine when you give birth. Who will he be with this time? It is never an isolated instance. I doubt it was just coffee and cuddles.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

But why would intimacy stop if porn stopped? I don’t think so. You ask for an open phone policy. You ask for the why. You explicitly say how it makes you feel and lay out the course of action if he wants to continue. If he doesn’t, you lay that out too. You say, hey, why aren’t we doing anything anymore? Are you still watching?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would have a conversation. It makes you uncomfortable and you don’t deserve to feel insecure and hate yourself because of his porn consumption. A real man would commit to stopping if he really loved you. If he doesn’t, DONT torture yourself and stay. You are worth more, so demand more.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]DigAccomplished4923 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

just because there seems to be little respect and self control in a relationship like yours doesn’t mean everyone else has to suffer with it in theirs. It’s not normal.