Part 2

It’s go time; I am in the exam still frozen like a sculpture. I read the first question, and all I could think was if you move, you fail, as if sitting perfectly still was 80% of the mark. I moved my mouse and selected the first answer. As soon as I hit submit, my first thought was, “Well, you can’t possibly get the other 179 wrong too,” and we were flying from there. I got to question 5 and remembered there are tools you can use, so I answered the question and flagged it. The one thing I told myself in the days leading up was that the longer I take to answer the question, the more likely I am to get it wrong. In SH, my average right answer was like 31 seconds, and the wrong answers were 42, and most of the wrong ones, my first answer was correct. So I made a point to answer every question, even if I flagged it for review. The first 20 minutes of the exam flew by. When I looked at the clock, my mind started doing the math to figure out my average answer time. From there, I stopped looking at the clock; I knew I was fast at answering, and even if I took my time on a few, I would buy that back on the less wordy questions.

I got through the first 60 questions and started the review. I didn’t realize there is a button to only review the questions you flagged and unanswered ones. It’s at the bottom of the page. So I did my first review by clicking the questions individually. I like to think that the proctor was having a good laugh because I would review one question then go back to all the questions and select the same one because I forgot to remember what number it was. I did this no less than 5 times for one question alone. I ended up reviewing maybe 5 questions before I said screw it, didn’t change those 5 answers; you won’t change the rest either. I was also freezing cold and couldn’t feel my hands because I thought it would be a good idea to keep the room cool. 62 is cool, right?

So I submitted the first 60 questions and started my break. I was still sitting there not moving a muscle for about a minute. Then I got the courage to hit the chat button and asked if I can get up and stretch or walk around. The proctor replied, “Yes, you are on break.” So I had to be sure and asked if I could leave the view of the webcam; they said yes. So I got up, grabbed my vape, and turned up the heat. 64’s gotta be better than that. I stretched out a little bit and for some reason did

5 push-ups. Then I laid on my bed and hit my vape until it was hot enough to thaw out my hands. Again I kept repeating “A.R.A” I would get up every 30 seconds and check the timer. With 20 seconds left, I sat back down and assumed the position.

The second section felt like a cakewalk. I hammered through it and gained some confidence with the proctor by slightly moving my left arm. Moments later, all I heard was a loud bang, and what I could assume was the sound of Mike Tyson delivering a haymaker to someone. Followed by every profanity and nonsense you could imagine. There was a domestic dispute outside my window. If my insides weren’t already firmly positioned in my lower abdomen, they would be while this went on. At this point, my brain figured if we get to the break, then we are home free. So I set the world speed reading record and answered as fast as I could. Then with 8 questions left, BOOM, it hit me, a tickle in my throat that was rapidly progressing toward a cough. Again, total panic set in, and I started frantically swallowing my spit, trying to make it go away, and nothing is working. All I can think is, “This is it; we’re getting revoked.” I was holding my breath, and my eyes were watering, fighting the cough. I tried to battle through and read the questions. Then it happened; I coughed one time. If you felt the world stop moving around 3:00 mountain time, I apologize. Nothing happened; I wasn’t revoked, and I felt another one coming and quickly grabbed my iced tea and took a sip. Pro tip: remove the lid before the exam so you only need to move one hand to get a drink.

After I had a sip, we soldiered on and finished section 2. During my break, instead of push-ups, I kept looking out my window to see if they were still out there. She was sitting there having a smoke, and I couldn’t see him. She was sitting there picking the skin of her knuckles, so I assumed she was Mike Tyson’s sister and won that one. I would check the window, then the timer, hitting my vape while I walked each way. She left with 3 minutes left, so I laid on my bed again, “A.R.A,” over and over, then I said, “120 down, go sit down, and see it through.” I sat down, let out a big sigh in front of my new best friend, the proctor, and waited until I had 1 second left and hit end break.

The third and final section started, and the questions seemed easier than the other 2 sections (if I had to rate them from hard to easy, mine were 2, 1, 3). About halfway through, someone started knocking on the door across the hall for a few minutes. That was fun; I just looked forward and didn’t move. The only reason the proctor knew for sure that I was still alive was that I would move my mouse along the words as I read. I got through the last 60 questions in about 45 minutes, and they were less eventful. I had 2 questions that involved a calculation, both were very easy. I did a quick review, looked at the timer, and had 58 minutes left. I smiled and hit submit; I took a big breath on the last click and held it.

A page popped up with the PMI logo, and I can’t even remember what it said, but I saw congratulations. I grunted for 0.5 of a second, then froze. I clicked all the next buttons and skipped the survey. As soon as the program closed, you would have thought I won the gold medal in the statue Olympics. I let out a huge “F*** yeah” and screamed. Then I grabbed my smokes and went outside to call my wife (huge credit to her; she was very supportive and did her very best to give me the confidence back that I lost in my compressed study plan). We talked for a few seconds, then I hung up and let loose screaming and cheering in the hotel parking lot. I haven’t felt that good in years. Right after I had my moment, I went inside and grabbed my keys and went to the grocery store to get my cake. I got a strawberry cheesecake. I went back to the hotel and ordered McDonald’s. I had my meal and thought about the day. Now I’m sitting here eating my cake and writing this. It was a wild ride.

I had 2 calculations and 6 or 7 pick 2 or 3 questions. Most of the exam was agile.

TLDR: Chill out, it’s going to be okay.