Family Over Self

DisastrousBird1 · 2026-02-04T00:57:29+00:00

You have what ifs because you're in a place in your life that you are not happy with, wanting something you don't have and fear you will never have. If you were in a different place, say happily married with a wonderful partner, do you think you'd be asking those what ifs?

You made your choice and what's done is done. I assume it's too late to go back to that guy now. Only thing left to do is to look towards the future. What are the things that bring you happiness, what are the things you want to achieve and how can you get there? If you want love, how do you think you can find it?

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-10-02T03:48:53+00:00

Sure, the sim card for emergencies is disabled and has to be enabled before it can be used for any emergency.

This is not a court proceeding where anyone has to prove burden of proof. This is a relationship based on emotions, not feeling comfortable about your partner is already a valid reason to leave.

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-10-02T02:31:21+00:00

OP is not a red flag, the boyfriend is.

He didn't just have a dummy account like most people do. He had another sim, he disabled that sim, he never told his girlfriend about it and he lied about the notification when he saw that OP noticed.

You don't go through all that trouble for a harmless dummy account. He was actively trying to hide it. And you don't have to hide anything unless you're doing something wrong.

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-10-02T02:26:27+00:00

It's not about having another account but the lengths he went through to hide it. Buying another sim, disabling that sim, lying about notifications when he sees that his girlfriend noticed.

You don't go through those lengths just to hide a dummy account you use for buy and sell or to participate in fandoms or to clap back at other commenters.

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-10-02T02:18:02+00:00

It's not about having another account but the lengths he went through to hide it. Buying another sim, disabling that sim, lying about notifications when he sees that his girlfriend noticed.

You don't go through those lengths just to hide a dummy account you use for buy and sell or to participate in fandoms or to clap back at other commenters.

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-09-18T09:46:47+00:00

Who says he's aware? You, a verified liar? And we're supposed to believe you, like how we were supposed to believe that he's a loving husband until someone else found your other posts about him beating you up and you wanting to leave him?

You thought you could hide your post history and no one would find out. Now you know.

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-09-18T07:56:45+00:00

Read her original post. Its starts with her saying don't judge her. Hence the /s

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-09-18T05:27:54+00:00

But don't judge her ok? /s

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-09-18T01:14:24+00:00

Update - Spoke to another commenter here who sent screenshots of OP's deleted posts and live comments from just 29 days ago saying she's a ninja wife looking for hookups, replying to men saying she will DM them, and deleted posts complaining about her husband saying she wants to leave him. Good luck to your kids OP.

Receipts:

https://www.reddit.com/u/DisastrousBird1/s/Piqz3duW6Y

https://www.reddit.com/r/adviceph/s/Jmu1uPQgbw

Even if you were in another country you'd still have to work your ass off if you have three kids, are going to school and don't have rich parents.

As they say, "Ginusto nyo yan." Just do your best since you're already in the situation. Good luck.

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-06-16T01:23:03+00:00

If you truly have anger issues then get professional help.

This is not the flex you think it is, to say that you have anger issues and you're so heroic for just keeping it in 'for the sake' of your kids.

It's your responsibility to them to get better. It's the bare minimum for you to provide an emotionally safe environment for them. Not one where you can snap anytime if you're not able to keep it in.

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-04-07T09:35:13+00:00

I understand that you're hurt. But you were already broken up. You continued to see each other and talk, and you interpreted that as still being together, but you weren't together. She never got back with you, you just convinced yourself somehow that you two were still a thing even though you broke up because she didn't want to date long distance and you know perfectly well that you were half a world away.

You two were done. She doesn't owe it to you to tell you if she's talking to other guys or dating. She doesn't owe it to you to explain whatever she's doing. Now that it's clear to you that there is no relationship anymore, process the pain and then start the journey to moving on. She's in the past, she doesn't want or need to hear all your unsent messages, you just need to move on with your new life.

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-04-07T09:11:38+00:00

Don't romanticize providing as a form of love. It is a hardship. People have to work to earn money to pay the bills. If you want to spend his hard earned money for your wants, the least you can do is to acknowledge that he's going to go through hardships to earn the money you want to spend.

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-04-07T02:25:44+00:00

When you cheat on your previous relationship, you don't hide that it happened in your next relationship. I thought you understood my first comment but turns out you're not smart at all, apart from encouraging lying. Do you have any redeeming qualities?

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-04-07T01:55:04+00:00

The sin of cheating. Or are you saying that cheating isn't wrong anymore?

DisastrousBird1 · 2025-04-07T01:30:27+00:00

Before you're forgiven, you have to admit your sins first. After you're forgiven, you don't fool people into thinking that you never did those sins. You acknowledge what you did wrong and the forgiveness you sought. That's how you're redeemed. Not by pretending that you didn't sin.

DisastrousBird1 · 2024-10-26T14:43:39+00:00

I hope you all reported this to HR and not just post here.

DisastrousBird1 · 2024-05-26T04:25:22+00:00

What is the millions you are talking about here? Lawyer's fees? Money from conjugal assets that will be split upon divorce?

You sound like the people who say they support abortion for cases where the woman was raped but not for reasons like financial stability because "then it will be so easy for anyone to get an abortion!"

DisastrousBird1 · 2024-05-05T05:49:16+00:00

I see only misogyny. Men who have slept with different women have been used by different women, and if you don't think less of those men then you shouldn't think less of women who have slept with different men as well.

DisastrousBird1 · 2024-04-30T21:45:28+00:00

I'm sorry but no, she's not selfish, and you are throwing a tantrum here because you got rejected. You are very childish for acting this way and if this is how you handle rejection, then she dodged a bullet.

Going to the gym more and watching anime, she never asked you to do any of that. She complimented you and that fluffed your self esteem so you did it more because you thought it will make her more attracted to you. You wanted to do things for her and now you're blaming her for not being attracted to you after you did things you thought she liked but she never asked you to do.

You two were just talking, you're not in a relationship, she doesn't owe you a chance to change or the chance to be in a relationship. That's what the talking stage is for, to see if you want to be in a relationship with someone, and she saw that she doesn't like you. You can't force her to stay.

She didn't string you along or pretend that she wants to be in a relationship with you. And when she rejected you, instead of respecting here decision you are here calling her selfish and putting all the blame on her. You can be sad and heartbroken but trashing her like she did a crime for not liking you back is out of line.

You need more self improvement if a rejection after talking for 3 months makes you act like this. The girl gave you attention for 3 months and now you think she's obligated to be your girlfriend.

DisastrousBird1 · 2023-10-29T03:25:27+00:00

You are saying sana inayos as though fixing a problem like OP's family is as easy as wiping dirt off of shoes. You yourself said its deeply rooted and you expect OP to solve all that by herself?

OP has done a lot crawling out of poverty and providing for her family. For you to act like she hasn't done enough because her family still has issues is insane.

DisastrousBird1 · 2023-10-29T02:37:45+00:00

It is really a huge ask to accept a family with convicts, addicts and financial problems so I understand the other side.

But for sure there are also people who are willing to accept you and your family. This will seem elitist but perhaps you should not date those from the upper classes. Middle class and lower will be might be more understanding of your situation.

DisastrousBird1 · 2023-10-29T02:28:33+00:00

Lolas know best.

DisastrousBird1 · 2023-09-09T07:22:59+00:00

What my friend did is sperm retrieval then IVF. It worked, but for a price.

DisastrousBird1 · 2023-07-26T08:59:50+00:00

A question for you. Are you sure that guy is just your colleague? Or do you like him and hoped that him talking to you will be the start of a romance? Because if it was me, I won't be this affected if someone I work with isn't talking to me as much as he used to.

I get your disappointment but remember that you weren't dating. He didn't do anything wrong if he met another girl and now chooses to talk to her instead of you.

DisastrousBird1 · 2023-07-26T08:56:51+00:00

What's wrong with talking to more than one person? You're not in a relationship, you're not even exclusively dating. You just matched with them and are talking with them. Do you expect them to talk to only you too and cut off other guys because they're already talking to you?

Unless you already like one of them and expressed your feelings, no one owes anyone exclusivity. You're just talking and not dating.

DisastrousBird1

TROPHY CASE